To think social media has made average people chronically dissatisfied?

[RealityCheckQueue]

People compare everything - looks, houses, parenting, careers, to curated illusions.

AIBU to think this is why no one feels “enough” anymore?

I think it's made people chronically daft to think that it anymore reflects real life than anything that is highly curated/choreographed.

Yep, I read some advice egarding that, something like 'Stop comparing your life to someone else's highlight reel'

It struck a chord with me

I think years ago we didn’t have as much insight into how other people live. You’d go to your friends / family / colleagues houses etc of course and go on holiday and see beautiful people and homes in magazines and on tv etc but now we have all this access to what people of all income brackets are doing and everything is preened and smoke/mirrored to perfection for the internet and it can easily make people feel dissatisfied with what they have.

I think it has made people competitive when they might not naturally have been, which has led to them being dissatisfied when they can’t compete with the filtered, staged photos. I also think it’s made people quite gullible - people will buy any old shit if they’ve seen it on Insta.

Who knew that careers/livings would be made by being an influencer and people would believe that what these influencers would say must be true

Obviously loads of it is fake and people just want to sell shit but I do think there is an element where before people wouldn’t necessarily see how others lived & now can feel something is lacking. Bragging/showing off was also frowned upon, it still is in real life but not on SM.

I like to look at the influencers lives on instagram etc, but it’s MN that makes me feel not good enough. I don’t earn anywhere near what some people on here do, I don’t have the amazing holidays or have the highflying, meaningful career.

Absolutely! I compare myself to women on SM. Yeah, yeah, thief of joy - know.

I know SM is packed with lies, but it's still hard to remember when the whole world is seemingly better off than you.

I remember posting pics of DCs first holiday. The pics were gorgeous and the scenery was beautiful. The holiday it's self was horrendous. I hated every minute of it, but the photos told a different story. I wasn't trying to fool anyone, I just posted the photos for memories. That's when I realised it isn't all as perfect as it seems.

The other side of it is the moaning and woe is me posts - seeking attention and validation. And people actually getting something out of 'likes.'

Apart from being on MN, I don't do social media anymore, and my life is so much better for it!

Why do you think nobody feels 'enough'?

I feel enough and so do my friends and family. We're all content and comfortable being ourselves.

I agree that some people compare and feel less themselves, you see that on here all the time, but I certainly don’t think it’s true of everyone, whether that’s down to individual personalities or someone’s friendship group I couldn’t say.

I have never compared myself to anyone who was a lot taller, prettier, thinner, richer or cleverer than me, as what would be the point? I might compare myself to someone I think is similar to myself and is doing better than me in any particular area of life, but it would normally come down to them putting more effort into whatever it is than me, and whether I could be bothered to do the same, and the answer is generally no.

I wouldn’t worry about what you read on here - pretty sure half of it is made up.

I think social media is just another tool. The people who have always tried to keep up with the Joneses, used to compare with what they saw, or what they imagined anyway.

They look on social media instead of looking from their windows and gossiping on their doorstep. It's not better or worst than it was.

Some try to make themselves feel better pretending that it's all fake, soon that it's all AI 😂. Envy and jealousy is not new.

I actually believe the most unhappy people are the ones who are posting these curated images... constantly making things look instagramable and being disappointed when the picture wasn't perfect enough to post.
I have 2 friends who are constantly searching for the next thing to "one up" somebody with and never contented with what they currently have. One of them is particularly bad and is constantly posting how "amazing" her life is, in reality it's very normal. She has also got us to pose for pictures or videos that never made her social media because they weren't deemed good enough. Both of them live a sad life.

I genuinely think lots of people are confident and secure in life.

this idea that we all have low self esteem and are vulnerable to jealousy makes it seem like the default is emotional immaturity, and it’s not.

In that context, you are right

But most of my friends use social media as photo albums, as do I.
My friends have a very rough idea of my financial situation, it's pretty obvious what house you have, what school the kids go to, what holiday you take. Nothing to show off about, but no one has to hide their holidays or Christmas Day.

Wannabe influencers have issues, normal people just like photos, and their own family/ friends enjoy looking at them
Social media can simply be a tool to be in touch with people

I agree. However it’s out teenagers im really worried about. They are getting battered with unrealistic expectations and it’s causing lots of mental health issues in them

I have to give my head a wobble sometimes. The other night I went for a walk to look at the Christmas lights people had put up in their houses, but instead of admiring their lights I felt discouraged by how much nicer their houses were compared to my little house, silly I know.

Yes, I work with tweens & teens & it’s so damaging for them.