DH being a complete arse!

[Sam9769]

Walking our two dogs today around a local field and rural road which is fairly busy. DH had one dog on a flexi lead and I had the other.
In the field, the the flexi leads were at their full length to allow the dogs to run around. As we were walking along the road, DH refused to rein in his flexi lead allowing the dog to run along the road. I asked him several time to rein him in as it was clearly a dangerous thing to do as he would have little control if the dog ran in front of a car our van. DH refused to do so saying it was safe! Several cars and a van went by including electric cars which are hard to hear.
When I asked him why he wouldn't listen to me the response was "Why, or why or why?" obviously belittling me. I then took hold of both dogs and struggled with them while another dog walker passed by with his dog. When I looked up DH was standing there laughing at me. I told him he was a complete arse and took the dogs into the house.
AIBU or is DH and arse?

Men can be utter prat’s when it comes to dogs or kids - of course they will instantly do as I command -I’m a big macho man hero.

Not wanting to scare you but I’ve also personally had one snap through where it attaches to the clip - it’s susceptible due to the swivel motion. As I only use them for places where most dogs can be offlead(one of mine is deaf) it did no harm. In a road however……

My truck is fitted with animal transit boxes for my dogs ie individual crates. No harness or collar required. I'll give you a harness required if needing to secure in a vehicle but absolutely not needed for a walk. Harnesses encourage pulling. Slip leads all the way.

Your so called "D"H is a stupid twat, but I guess you know that already.

i have a dog… I don’t have a car. So I don’t particularly see why I shouldn’t be allowed to use a collar on my dog who hates harnesses. Not everyone drives

Yep - had the experience of somebody who had an Alsatian on a flex lead - guy thought it was locked. Dog managed to run across the road on the flex lead to try to get to my Cocker Spaniel - knocked me down in the process - lucky it was not hurt. Really not designed for walking along the road or large dogs,

Because he's an arrogant arse!

The dog wasn't on the road so why were you micromanaging your dh. I think yabu.

Just my opinion but I think women are better at risk assessment, they are better at spotting potential risks whereas men can be more cavalier about it. If your DH wants to risk his own safety that's his right but he doesn't get to make fun of you because you don't want to endanger the dogs.

Your Dh risked the safety of the dog and also of drivers who would have to slow/swerve to avoid a dog in the road. I’d be furious with him. My lot are on short leads on the pavement or slip leads. I used a fixed longline because I had a horse when teaching recall. Hate flexileads and would worry that it would break/wouldn’t retract when needed.

WTF is wrong with him?

Let me guess - this is his normal way of treating you?

Your H is an idiot so treat him like one and bin both flexi leads.

We do use them but take short leads too and use those for any roads or transitions.

Absolute nonsense! We’ve had the same flexi lead for 22 years and it’s never once failed with both big dogs and small ones. It’s even been used with my brother’s collie/lab cross and never given in.

Right….so because it hasn’t happened to you, it’s not a possibility then?
Or in fact something that several of us here have first hand experience of 🙄

Yes, not too far off!
For example, I recently suggested taking a calcium and vitamin D tablet daily.
He poo pooed the idea saying that too much calcium is bad for you.
Anyway, I was at the GP for something else but brought the packet of tablets and asked her if it would be good for us to take them.
She said yes, one a day. Now, he's taking it.
What would I knowI also strongly suspect that if one of the neighbours suggested that he used a short lead on the road he'd do it without question.

We have a stupid woman who walks two dogs on flexi leads through a residental area.
She's stupid because one is about 15 feet in front of her and the other a similar distance behind whilst she walks along she gawps at her phone. No fucking control at all over her animals.

The dog was on the road and cars and vans were passing by, that's why I asked him to shorten the lead but he knows better until something really bad happens!
How is asking him to shorten the lead micro managing??
Believe me, the last thing I want to do is manage him.
That would be a total nightmare!

OP, is his name Noel? 😉

Actually, I took calcium supplements until I had a medical where it was discovered that I had too much calcium and the doctor told me to come off them. You should have your calcium levels checked to see if you need supplements. Vitamin D you probably do need in winter.

OP not sure which are the bigger knobs on here, your h or some of the posters on here.

This sounds very much like something my DH would have done. There were so many small episodes of conflict like that - god forbid someone (me) spoke up about a situation. The refusal to consider that I could possibly have a reasonable point, and the smirking and belittling - it was absolutely exhausting. We got divorced earlier this year and every time I read a post like yours, I can feel the sheer relief washing over me. You are definitely not being unreasonable. Your poor dogs, I hope they stay safe!

Sorry, I should have made it clear that the road we were on is a country road with no footpaths and as far as the width is concerned there is just about enough room for two oncoming cars to pass.

Oh and DH never likes to discuss anything.
After an argument, waits to see if I've cooled down. If not, he'll walk off and come back later to see how the land lies but will rarely discuss anything!

I'm not sure what point you're trying to make - that you've been lucky so flexi leads aren't dangerous?

@Sam9769 so it's not really about the dog?