First date planning

[Heresto26]

So I'll keep this brief as super busy tonight. First time poster.
I've been single for almost a year. 44 no kids. Would love to meet someone. Been let down a good few times ..tired of online dating but thought I'd give it another go.
Just started chatting to someone. He mentioned a date. I said coffee tomorrow. He agreed. I know this seems fast but I hate chatting online for ages. So I was looking to see where is a good place to meet him ..somewhere roughly half way I thought. He's suggested a place 6 mins from his hometown but half hour from mine (he knows the town I live in). There's part of me that feels this is pretty inconsiderate and selfish of him. I think I really noticed it as he sent the suggestion while I was on Google maps trying to find a place that seemed more 'fair' in terms of travel.
I'm unreasonable - he just didn't think
I'm not being unreasonable - this is an early sign of thoughtlessness

It s one coffee date.
Just go
See how the vibe is.
Have a,suggestion ready nearer you if you want a second date

If you have a spot that’s midway, suggest it and see what the response is.

I wouldn’t automatically dismiss his suggestion as being lazy, it could be that he’s a coffee snob and really likes a particular cafe close to home etc. of course it could be that he’s a creature of habit/lazy sod, which is why it’s worth saying offering your suggestion mid way.

30 mins wouldn’t bother me at this stage.

Thought you were going to say two hours away or something!

Is it a nice independent coffee shop that is only in that location? Or is it just a Starbucks and he’s lazy?

It's not in any specific coffee place I think it's more just let's get a costa in that area type of thing. I'll suggest the place roughly halfway for us both and see what the response is. Thank you!

Sounds lazy to me.

Why don't you check places half way on tripadvisor and say you saw that "this place" has good reviews and is "about half way"?

Does he drive/have access to a vehicle to travel? Maybe he is fitting a last min first date in with other commitments because he is keen?

We could guess why but you could ask why there if he pushes back on your half way suggestion? He isn't a mind reader and may think you are happy with his suggestion unless you tell him otherwise? Don't guess! Or replay old "scripts"

Thanks everyone. It's so helpful to be able to ask and get others' perspectives. I really appreciate everyone who has replied. I'll report back once he's responded.

^Yeah, this - lazy or stingey, perhaps.

Maybe he’s fed up of travelling to dates that lead nowhere. I’d go but see what happens next time - if things get that far.

He's replied. He doesn't drive. I realize this might come across as unfair and judgemental but I find that a bit off putting in this situation. I don't want to be the one driving all the time. What to do 🤔

Just because he doesn't drive I wouldn't dismiss him that's really harsh to do that I didn't drive when myself and now dh met In 2016 you know what he drove 5 hours ( each way their and back ) to meet me and took me for lunch I offered to go half way he declined and now we are still together 🤷😁 so yes I think your unreasonable to say oh he doesn't drive so don't want to be driving all the time

You're right. I've had a think about it and I agree. I've dated plenty of horrible ones that do drive so driving in itself is not a good indication of character 🙈🤣
Im going to meet him.

Wishing you all the best op ☺️ please update after your date 🌹