Do you think this is odd, a night out with school mum friends and one asks you in front of the others how’s your sex life?

[NewYearFitQueen]

Errmmm what the heck

Bit more context?

Sorry the aibu is

I think that’s is being unreasonable
do you agree

yanbu of you agree it’s odd not on

yabu you think it’s fair enough question

I'd think some people have no filter! I know some groups of friends are perfectly comfortable talking about that, but I would never ask anyone. How did you respond?

Sitting around chatting
one was complaining she’s not really attracted to her dh

not spent loads of time with these people
maybe 3/4 maybe 5 things per year over the past five years or so

Depends how well you know everyone present and if it’s something you would normally talk about?

Also how it was asked - off the back of a related topic/comment

Tone used

Replied by saying it has its moments..

You need to share a bit more info. I have some friends, including school mum
friends I would have this chat with, others I wouldn’t. Equally some friends who would never go near this topic.

What’s your issue, the topic or who
asked it, or the forum in which it was asked?

Someone people think this is normal talk, some don't. I very rarely discuss this kind of thing with anyone and if I did it would only be with two people I am close to. That said, you can be out at the pub and a group of people on the table behind are loudly talking about their sex lives and not seeming to care who hears. Everyone is different I guess.

If you all know each other well enough and are close enough friends to talk about that kind of thing together then yes, otherwise no.

Personally I'm not close enough to any of my school mum friends to have that conversation in a group. However there are a group of mums I know who met when their dc were in reception and are still best friends now the dc are in year 13.

Someone you hardly knows asks you this and you need to ask if it’s odd? 🤨

It depends if you know them well. I do know some good friends who discuss a huge amount of detail about this and I have kids of a similar age to theirs. You don’t have to share back. I used to say something along the lines of ‘all good here’ and when they knew they wouldn’t get any juicy gossip the conversation moved on. Some people just share more, others massively over share and some think the bedroom antics should be private to the people actually involved and not the general public.

I think I think if they volunteer the info and want to talk about that fine, what I personally find odd is asking

That is a bit crass, unless maybe you were with your bestie and you always talked about that stuff pretty explicitly.

I mean I do sometimes ask 'hows your love life?' if they don't have a long term partner. But only the select people who I know are into having a sex life and possibly dating/having a partner. But again not a colleague, a fairly close friend or family member only.

Of course it’s wildly inappropriate to ask that in a group setting, never mind one where the members are not particularly close.

I would have loudly responded “it’s pretty great, thanks. What would you like to know exactly?” 😁

Not something I’d discuss even with my close friends, but I’m probably an outlier. Depends on the people really.

I was with a group of friends, one of whom loves to talk about sex a lot. She asked one of our more reserved friends what her boyfriend was like in the sack. I think the woman just likes making people feel uncomfortable. I think she feels she is cool.

But it’s such a stupid question because sex, probably more than most things, is subjective.

I think these people just like “audio porn” and get a thrill hearing about the ins and outs of other people’s sex lives.

I don’t think it’s appropriate to ask about other people’s sex lives no. Unless you are very close and freely and openly discuss sex.
if someone asked me I’d just say not open for discussion

Very odd and very invasive more to the point and quite perverted, imo.
You don’t know what you could be triggering asking such personal questions.

I think it’s ok response when married mums are ganging up on the single mum about dating etc for gossip for the single mum to ask back to them about the state of their marriage! Otherwise rude

There isn't a single person on this planet I would discuss my sex life with (bar my husband of course) I'd be very put off hanging round with them

I've lead a sheltered life. The only fact I know about any of my friends sex lives is how many kids they have..

I have friends who would have this conversation, and friends who would prefer to be on fire (plus a couple who start off closer to category 2 but whose boundaries dissolve on contact with rum...). If someone just asked out of the blue with no lead-in I'd assume they were wanting to move the conversation that way but weren't sober enough for subtlety. Any chance the one who asked is having a tough time and trying to fish for a conversation starter?

Some people overstep and have no filter/social awareness, especially when there's drink involved. It's easy to bat away these sorts of comments though with a raised eyebrow and 'I don't know you well enough for you to ask me that! or a smile and 'I have no complaints!'

This is actually normal talk amongst my friends and I wouldn't feel at all fazed to be asked, although I'd hope I'd be a little more conscious of someone I didn't know that well. You have socialised with them for a while though so I don't think it's wildly outrageous.

I need a lot more context.