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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is it mean not to let Dd go to friends house on xmas day?

27 replies

Atleastitsalmostdone · 25/12/2025 15:47

Dd is 7, her friend over the back is here, she was begging me to let her go there and play. Her friend hasn’t been to ours for a while so I said she’s very welcome to come here for a short while to see Dd’s presents. Her friend isn’t allowed, I’d like xmas day to be a family day, Dd is shouting that it’s the worst day ever because I won’t let her go.

OP posts:
Moonnstarz · 25/12/2025 15:52

Isn't this the same issue? You don't want your DD to go to the friends house and the neighbours don't want their DD over yours. Both of you want your children in your own homes. Just explain that and say not today.

Impactmascara · 25/12/2025 15:53

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Jungleballsjungleballs · 25/12/2025 15:54

‘Not today you can go another day in the holidays. ‘

she’s 7 - she’ll get over it.

RendeersDancingTowardsChristmas · 25/12/2025 15:55

No, Christmas Day is family day.

vanillalattes · 25/12/2025 15:55

You not allowing DD to visit there is no different from her friend not being allowed to visit yours.

She'll get over it.

Sunshineismyfavourite · 25/12/2025 15:55

The friend isn't allowed which tells me the parents want their day to be family only too.

Just tell her no. It's not really negotiable OP - why are you arguing with a 7 year old?

BreakfastClubBlues · 25/12/2025 15:57

Just take her out for a walk. She'll have calmed down by the time you get home.

MCF86 · 25/12/2025 16:02

I'd probably double check with the parents and then agree to 15 minutes to go see her friends presents, but then straight back.
BUT no means no, and friend wasn't allowed either so she can't claim it is unfair!

ResusciAnnie · 25/12/2025 16:04

No that’s crazy! Get out of my house on Xmas day, child!

Atleastitsalmostdone · 25/12/2025 16:04

Sunshineismyfavourite · 25/12/2025 15:55

The friend isn't allowed which tells me the parents want their day to be family only too.

Just tell her no. It's not really negotiable OP - why are you arguing with a 7 year old?

It doesn’t help that they’re are saying Dd is very welcome over there

OP posts:
Skybluepinky · 25/12/2025 16:14

Sounds like you need to up your parenting skills, when you say no you mean it, and she knows not to question it.

vanillalattes · 25/12/2025 16:20

Atleastitsalmostdone · 25/12/2025 16:04

It doesn’t help that they’re are saying Dd is very welcome over there

So why won't you let her go? Genuinely, what's the problem?

Fidgety31 · 25/12/2025 16:29

YABU that you are allowing a 7year old to cause you stress on Christmas Day! You’ve said no so that’s the end of it….. or are you one of those mummies that finds it hard to stick to what they say?

scorpiogirly · 25/12/2025 16:32

If the friend's parents were okay with it, I see no reason not to let her go for half and hour to an hour. I'm sure it would have made their day.

verycloakanddaggers · 25/12/2025 16:40

Atleastitsalmostdone · 25/12/2025 16:04

It doesn’t help that they’re are saying Dd is very welcome over there

You said this yourself Confused

Impactmascara · 25/12/2025 17:15

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Moonlightfrog · 25/12/2025 17:33

I thought this was another thread where an older teen wanted to spend Christmas with friends instead of family. She’s 7, it’s Christmas Day and it sounds like the other child’s parents don’t want your dd over or for there’s to go to yours? You said ‘no’ and she needs to except it.

I only ever saw friends Xmas day if I had a new bike/scooter/roller skates and I saw them outside whilst trying it out. I never went to friends houses….not until I was 17/18 .

Howardyoudo · 25/12/2025 23:15

Skybluepinky · 25/12/2025 16:14

Sounds like you need to up your parenting skills, when you say no you mean it, and she knows not to question it.

Exactly, and allowing a 7yo to shout and behave SO badly too? That deserves a consequence not asking MN whether to listen to a 7yo!

wandawaves · 25/12/2025 23:17

I thought this was going to be about a teenager.

She's 7 OP. Tell her no, and tell her to fix her attitude.

PollyBell · 25/12/2025 23:24

scorpiogirly · 25/12/2025 16:32

If the friend's parents were okay with it, I see no reason not to let her go for half and hour to an hour. I'm sure it would have made their day.

This, Christmas should be for what everyone wants to do

TurkeyQueen · 25/12/2025 23:52

How did they even have contact today for this to happen?!

summitfever · 25/12/2025 23:57

I remember being that age and all going out with friends on our new bikes and skooters or roller skates etc, it was so nice and great memories. Don’t see the issue, personally. Is Christmas not supposed to be for kids? 🤔

Okiedokie123 · 26/12/2025 00:02

PollyBell · 25/12/2025 23:24

This, Christmas should be for what everyone wants to do

How does that work with the op wishes of wanting to spend Christmas Day with her daughter? If the 7yo gets her wish then the op won’t?

How do they even know what the other is up to anyway being only 7? I would just say “no, not today”. Christmas Day is about family being together as much as is possible.

EilonwyWithRedGoldHair · 26/12/2025 00:23

I wouldn't have seen any harm in letting her visit her friend, but I also don't think it's particularly wrong not to.

PollyBell · 26/12/2025 00:30

Okiedokie123 · 26/12/2025 00:02

How does that work with the op wishes of wanting to spend Christmas Day with her daughter? If the 7yo gets her wish then the op won’t?

How do they even know what the other is up to anyway being only 7? I would just say “no, not today”. Christmas Day is about family being together as much as is possible.

Well to me it works by saying you can only stay an hour, it is not a competition but no I dont see how forcing people to not do what they want helps anyone