To feel so bloody stressed?

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I've enjoyed this season and its magic. I have. 3 (4 just after xmas) and 1yo(2 in february though) . This is the 1st year eldest has fully understood the magic of santa. Its been so special. Even to tonight hes offered his dummy to him for an extra present as hes a 'big boy' - i couldn't be prouder! Yep still got a dummy been quite hard trying to get it off him

But I am so stressed. I've had no appetite for days. DH is off work and hes a contractor (so been furloughed) and its like hes got a shock to the system how it can be hard work managing the 2 young kids. We've had meltdowns, bickering etc and its tough and I feel slightly burnt out but I get on with it along with alllll the housework , I am mainly on my own with the kids , I've done every single wrapping of presents and did I mention im.bloody doing christmas dinner?

Not only that but we went to MIL today with all od DHs side. Long story short 1/2 of his brothers doesnt like me or acknowledge me but he plays it off quite well as there's about 15 of us kids included when everyone's together. Mentioned it to DH months ago who told me I was being sensitive and its hard when its busy and everyones there. They (him and partner) barely acknowledge our youngest for some reason? Its odd but he caused an argument over me when I was pregnant with youngest, wont go into that but DH didnt speak to.him for.months to tbe point of his brother not even texting congratulations or sending a card when our daughter was born and they reconciled after their parents rang my.Dh repeatedly (mind you we had a just 2 year old adjusting and newborn and all they rang about was this bloody tiff) harassing him

That was long sorry but that had my.appetite gone. I felt horrid there. So alone and wanted to leave its horrible when you can sense people dislike you

Bit calmer now im home and hopefully done with them until after new year

But I feel a bit sad. Im just so stressed. I want it perfect. Im very aware its an overwhelming time for the kids especially DS as his birthday is 4 days after xmas its always a lot for.him but afterwards he can get really meltdowns and tantrums as its a lot to handle

Anyone just so stressed? Vent away here x

Big family gatherings can be stressful for all, especially young children.

who are you cooking for tomorrow? If it’s just you, just peel it back to what matters. Kids, presents, bits of the roast dinner the will eat. Make it as easy as possible for yourself and keep the routine as much as possible for the kids

If you're stressed, imagine how overwhelming it is for the kids. You're one step away from a meltdown - they don't have the restraint to avoid it. Tomorrow, if it's just you're immediate family, do the bits of Xmas lunch you actually like and make sure you eat at a normal time so the kids aren't hangry. If they are fussy do fish fingers or peanut butter toast. Have a leisurely day and at the slightest hint of people getting tetchy get everyone out to the park/beach/woods for a couple of hours! It doesn't need to be perfect, nothing ever is. You just want to be emotionally present for it x

I think you’re bloody awesome - the hard bits over, it’s just you dh and the babies tomorrow - so you can relax a bit and just have a Sunday dinner meal with lovely presents.

After Christmas I would be thinking of different ways to address the big Christmas get togethers in future.

Thanks all. Just us 5 (DH dad coming - divorced from mil ) so its not too bad. Just adds to my stress that DH is useless it feels that's horrible to say but every meltdown etc hes like what should I do

Sometimes I feel like the 23year old with no idea with my newborn and I've just had to learn along the way!! He thinks I've got some manual stashed away

I've had a hot bubble bath and laid everything out and relaxing a bit now. Just focusing on how good it'll be and will be keeping an eye on temperament but we will be seeing my parents who are a 10 min walk away so will most likely walk to and from theirs so we get some nice fresh air and burn off some excess energy

Unfortunately the gatherings on DH side are just basically when everyone can get together theyre monthly or bimonthly. Very tiring and I just feel anxious when I know someone dislikes me? Odd and I probably shouldve put the let them theory book on my Christmas list lol x