8 year old iPhone

[Mumto2at]

So SS (8) asked for a phone for Christmas. We agreed no on our end as he used a spare old one he was playing with to ring emergency services earlier that day (no SIM card in and also rang the American one luckily). Shows he's clearly not mature enough to have a phone.
BM was insistent on the phone.
anyway husband leaves Xmas shopping till last minute like he does annoyingly (I left this to him for SS and I just sorted our two out).
anyway we're sorting all the presents out under the tree and he shows me he's gotten him an iPhone 13 contract plan.
He hadn't even discussed this with me he said he was going to give him his old phone but get him a phone case, charger etc and 'set up' the phone to parental controls.
am I right to be fuming at this? We do do have separate accounts atm for various reasons but we're supposed to be sorting our finances to be able to get a bigger house next year for the kids

originally it was a no way but BM guilt tripped him so he decided about setting his old phone up with parental controls ect

Did he pay a similar amount for your joint children presents?

Buying an iPhone for an 8 year old is both unreasonable and irresponsible.

No 8 year old needs that.

No I just asked him for £150 to cover our joint kids I probably spent around 320-350ish in total on them

So your joint children are not an equal priority. Why am I not surprised.

Getting an 8 year old an iphone is ridiculous! What for?
shit parenting at its finest

This is between your husband and his ex partner.

That’s insane and not responsible an 8 year old, “a contract plan”.
an old iPhone with wifi is one thing but a contract?

I would be angry too, not about the price of the phone but the fact he’s only 8 years old. It’s likely he will run up a huge bill that his dad will have to pay and I give it 2 weeks before it’s lost or broken.

Literally yesterday we were in the shop and I showed him some phone cases suggesting he puts a new one on so SS wouldn't know it was his old phone and he told me this is what he was doing new charger etc. then he has our kids whilst I'm visiting family in hospital and does a U turn and just buys him a phone like this. He's 8 years old and definitely not on the maturer side of 8 either. I worry he will lose it, break it (apparently I don't need to worry about that as it's insured and he will be monitoring it via find my iPhone/parental controls) or even worse older kids see him with it and rob it from him. He's still in primary and lives in a rough area. I know it's technically not by business but I think it's just leading to trouble (and I would never let our 2 have a phone at 8. Leaving primary going to secondary school age yes but not a brand new phone either due to my reasons I've just given).
I can't even look at him I'm that infuriated

An 8yo doesn’t need a fecking phone.

check our smartphone free childhood and educate yourself and your family before you hand it over.

Children really don't need, or should have, mobile phones. Toys would be a better idea.

He’s an idiot. I’d have no respect for my husband if he behaved so stupidly. Has he got anything for your shared kids or is he yet another Disney dad who had more kids and no intention of caring for them as much as his older one?

He hasn't bought our joint oldest a couple of things but I've done the vast amount of it (as I said he's very last minute all the time and that stresses me out, I'd prefer to research, look at when sales are coming up etc- some are impulse buys but majority I've planned; hence me just telling him to give me money lol).
tbf I don't know if I'm more mad that he's bought him a new phone when if he decided this was the route a month or two ago I'd have at least done research to get a cheap older phone (end of day it's not my decision for him to have a phone even though I think it's incredibly stupid) or if it's that he's just done a U Turn on the plan without even mentioning it to me

I’m still not 100% sure why you think he should have told you the plan?

Buying an 8 year old a phone is ridiculous who evers child it is and an expensive iPhone even more so. Is he otherwise a good parent?

It's between him and his ex isn't it? But if I was him I'd have said no, and ex could buy it if she insisted. I'd be taking it off SS during his time at my house too.

So basically he did what his ex told him to do and ignored his partner?

Leaving aside the age and cost compared to the other kids, it’s bonkers getting one on contract… it’ll come back to bite him i bet…

Normally I would say YABU if it's something SS parents have agreed on between them, but I'll judge anyone handing an iphone to an 8 year old.