To lose the plot with ‘DH’

[HP200]

So back story DH and his ex used to share his kids over Christmas so one had Xmas eve until lunch and then the other got from lunchtime until Boxing Day. His ex wanted to swap this arrangement for a few years to fit around her husbands children and DH always refused as wanted to see his kids at some point on the day.
Last year ex told him he could have them all the way through to Boxing Day it was easier- I told him that would mean she would have them this year all through as it would fit in with her husbands kids so he needed to accept that if he had them last year. low and behold she is having them all Christmas this year!
Now my point he has refused to get anything for Christmas, has made no effort and is miserable and grumpy. I am sick of it and told him next year when he has his kids he can do and sort everything as he clearly only ‘helps’ when it’s for his kids - he has sulked off to bed.
AIBU that he only contributes and helps when his children are here

Ugh, am sure plenty of other people will be along soon, but Jesus wept he isn't doing himself any favours is he?

So he ignored the fact that he wouldn't have the kids over Christmas this year (despite you and presumably his ex reminding him 🙄 ) and now he's having a strop.

How long has his sulk been going on for? If he only worked out, that despite women making noises at him all year, and presumably his kids talking about it, that his kids are at their mum's then he's still left it too late (if he genuinely believed, despite what everyone else said) to make a nice Christmas for them
If he realised a few weeks ago then he should've got over it and made it a nice Christmas anyway

Can you leave him to it and go and stay elsewhere? Or even look for a last minute break?

This is what he's like when you arent looking after his kids for him. Life's a bit too short for this nonsense.

Do you have dc?
Can you go see friends or family tomorrow? No way would i be sat in with The Grinch..

Do you have DC (either you or joint?)

Id absolutely do none of the organising next year unless he's up in the next ten mins and mucking in. How rude of him.

so next year, no presents for the kids, no cooking dinner, no food shop to accommodate, no tickets for anything fun. Just cover your own stuff. I'd be furious with him. It shows he doesn't care about you, only when you do stuff for his kids.

Do you have anyone you can go visit tomorrow instead?

Yes I have 2 DC myself so have bought every present (including for extended family), wrapped every thing, done food/ drink shopping, cleaning, cards and everything else that goes into Christmas plus worked full time all with a breaking a rib last week.
He has known for about a month he was not seeing them and seemed to accept it but as it’s getting closer has become worse and I can feel myself
going
to explode at him

His ex told him about a month ago he wouldn’t be having them but I told him last year when she offered them the whole Christmas period this would be the case and if he had them (which I am happy for him to do) he needed to accept she would have them this year which is exactly what happened

Man baby thought he wouldn’t have to skip this year just because she gave up last year and is now having a tantrum that it’s not fairrrr

Poor baby.

Yes leave everything that’s not for your children and family up to him next year. All of it.

I'm sorry, you have a broken rib and he hasn't lifted a finger to help you???? I don't rush to say LTB but honestly, id be getting xmas out the way and having a very, long hard look at this relationship. What did he think was going to happen this Christmas? Idiot.