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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate Xmas?

59 replies

WinoTime · 24/12/2025 09:12

Things I hate about Christmas:
Obligation to cater, host and see family
Enforced jollity
No time alone to just sit and read my book or watch crappy movies

Things I like about Christmas :
Day Drinking

YANBU - Same here - I too am wishing for a cosy space with a tv and a wine fridge to hide away

YABU - shut up you misery guts and appreciate that you have family who want to see you

OP posts:
ThisElatedOtter · 27/12/2025 15:52

I 100% agree and am in exactly the same boat. You are not being unreasonable. I'm really starting to resent it.

Original poster
WinoTime · 27/12/2025 16:21

Doone22 · 27/12/2025 10:05

Do you only have the obligatory visit at Christmas? You should be visiting them all year round anyway if they're elderly and alone. I'm not saying you need to become their sole support but a half hour visit every month would be a start.

Show quote history

How do you get this idea ? We visit regularly

OP posts:
Original poster
WinoTime · 27/12/2025 16:23

All done.

Food cooked, served, cleaned up.

Final house guest departed today.

The weekend is clear of plans and other people so can chill

Merry Christmas everyone

OP posts:
Boomer55 · 27/12/2025 16:24

WinoTime · 24/12/2025 09:12

Things I hate about Christmas:
Obligation to cater, host and see family
Enforced jollity
No time alone to just sit and read my book or watch crappy movies

Things I like about Christmas :
Day Drinking

YANBU - Same here - I too am wishing for a cosy space with a tv and a wine fridge to hide away

YABU - shut up you misery guts and appreciate that you have family who want to see you

It’s one day. Nothing to stress about. 🤷‍♀️

Original poster
WinoTime · 27/12/2025 16:26

Boomer55 · 27/12/2025 16:24

It’s one day. Nothing to stress about. 🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

It isn’t one day - it’s two very long and busy days for me

OP posts:
Delatron · 27/12/2025 16:45

I am sick of hosting every year. Somehow we have the PILa every single year while DH’s sister never has them and just comes to us when it’s her turn to see them.

I have told DH I want a year off next year and have it just us and teens. But then he’d be grumpy and call the day boring. He’d ruin my quiet day. I can’t win.

purplerain270 · 27/12/2025 16:57

zurigo · 24/12/2025 11:27

I don't hate Christmas, but I do find all the preparation really draining, and that's despite cutting it down as much as I can without upsetting or disappointing anyone. I have a large family and two kids, so there is a lot of planning, buying, decorating, wrapping and visiting that happens every year. What this means is that for the whole month of December I just don't get any downtime and it's bloody exhausting!

Very sad 😔 is about helping others being kind an not judging, only way to be happy.x

Extraz · 27/12/2025 19:02

I’ve had various family staying from 22nd - 27th. Last one left at midday today. I am exhausted and so happy to have my house back and it’s quiet.

I end up hosting most years. If I didn’t, people would be alone.

Sillysoggyspaniel · 27/12/2025 19:03

Maryberrysbouffant · 26/12/2025 21:56

In theory you’re correct, but things like obligation, peer pressure etc come into play in real life.

I don’t think I’ve ever done Christmas exactly as I would like. I went from living with my parents who obviously decided how we spent Christmas…then moved in with my partner who had obligations to his parents as well so we used to take two families into account when deciding on plans, and that carried on into eternity.

Not once have we gone “fuck the lot of them, let’s do what WE fancy”. It’s our own fault, but I think a lot of people are in the same boat and don’t want to upset other family members.

Even now, we end up bowing to the pressure of our adult dc who enjoy a particular kind of Christmas Day.

Show quote history

But surely at the very least you could have a three year cycle of either set of parents and a year at home? As the absolute bare minimum.

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