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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU isolating after son diagnosed with Pneumonia

17 replies

Nickyloui · 23/12/2025 17:58

Hello I'm really struggling after my son (3) was hospitalised 8 weeks ago with RSV and Bronchiolitis then only after 1 week of being well, he caught a virus which developed into Pneumonia 3 weeks ago and was hospitalised again - he was very unwell. He has just recovered and we were hoping, after isolating for 3 weeks, to join our family for Christmas. My father has come down with a bad cold today and I'm very worried about my son being around someone who is actively unwell, given all that he has been through. AIBU?

OP posts:
JudgeBread · 23/12/2025 18:02

Honestly I'm normally not someone who is worried about stuff like this and am very "crack on" generally because you really can't avoid illness forever. But your poor lad's immune system has taken a hell of a battering in a relatively short space of time, and 3 weeks is quite a short recovery period from pneumonia. While he might be better in himself his immune system may still be fragile and his body may still be recovering. I'd be tempted to give it a miss for his sake.

Sillysoggyspaniel · 23/12/2025 19:20

Yeah as above, normally I'd say crack on but I do think he needs a chance to recover and recuperate.

outerspacepotato · 23/12/2025 19:23

You son doesn't need to be exposed to anyone with respiratory infections. He's just had 2 major respiratory infections, RSV and pneumonia, and his lungs are affected by that. Stay home. His health insurance s your priority.

Original poster
Nickyloui · 23/12/2025 19:24

Thanks both - clutching at straws here but how would you feel about members of the same household who are not symptomatic coming to visit instead?

OP posts:
Sillysoggyspaniel · 23/12/2025 19:27

Nickyloui · 23/12/2025 19:24

Thanks both - clutching at straws here but how would you feel about members of the same household who are not symptomatic coming to visit instead?

I'd be ok with that. Active obvious infection is one thing, but assuming you're still all leaving the house to shop and go to parks etc you'll be brushing up against this sort of situation all the time. It could even be you. Just hand wash on entry to the house.

Contrarymary30 · 23/12/2025 19:30

Could your Father keep out of the way for an hour or so while you visit ? This is what I would do in your Father's circumstances so my Gc could visit

outerspacepotato · 23/12/2025 19:46

Your son has had severe inflammation of his airways and lungs. Anyone who could possibly be contagious needs to stay away. If someone is pressuring you to visit, call your pediatrician for guidance. The more infections he gets, the worse shape his airways and lungs will be in. RSV can leave kids with chronic respiratory issues for years.

This is time for you to FaceTime or video chat.

grinchmcgrinchface · 23/12/2025 19:48

Nickyloui · 23/12/2025 19:24

Thanks both - clutching at straws here but how would you feel about members of the same household who are not symptomatic coming to visit instead?

Honestly? Don’t even risk it. It’s not worth it.

Butterflyarms · 23/12/2025 19:49

Just tell them your kid is sick again and you can't make the journey.

LostittoBostik · 23/12/2025 19:49

I’d just have a quiet Xmas at home and dodge all family obligations. If they kick up a stink remind the how serious pneumonia is in under 5s and that he won’t be fully recovered for a couple of months. He really wouldn’t want to be getting the super flu right now

Sirzy · 23/12/2025 19:50

Personally (as the Mum of a bronchi baby who still has lung issues 16 years down the line) I would be enjoying a relaxing Christmas as just your household. Give your son more time to recover an see your extended family in a week or so.

MrsSkylerWhite · 23/12/2025 19:50

Of course you stay home.
As a granny, that’s what I would insist that you do.

Middlemarch123 · 23/12/2025 19:51

Completely agree with PPs, trust your gut, protect your little one

SunMoonandChocolate · 23/12/2025 19:51

Look after you son OP. In your shoes I wouldn't risk having anyone else to the house, whether they have the lurgy or not, but then I nearly died of pneumonia 10 years, ago, and am feeling very unwell with a chest infection as I write. Your poor boy probably can't articulate too well if he begins to feel poorly again, so please don't take a risk, just because it's Christmas, it's not worth it.

Sneesellsseashells · 23/12/2025 19:52

Absolutely not my son got neutropenia after pneumonia. If your son has that he basically has zero immune system. He was 4 and wasn’t even allowed go to school until he recovered. I am also generally very casual but you’ve had enough on your plate.

AbzMoz · 23/12/2025 19:52

I suspect you’ll spend the run up to it fretting, and the entire day fretting, and the days following it fretting… I would. Focus on having a fun (or relaxing) day with your own household with a video call or two, and agree to meet up in the new year.

Hope LO is much better

Original poster
Nickyloui · 23/12/2025 19:57

Thank you all for taking the time to respond, my mind is just all over the place from SD and I cannot tell what is anxiety or common sense. I now feel happier with my decision x

OP posts:
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