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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Why do people attend routine dental appointments when they’re really ill??

95 replies

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 10:27

I’m a dental hygienist. It’s two days before Christmas. Just had a patient in who I could hear coughing and spluttering before I even called them in. (Busy waiting room so I’m sure all the other patients loved that). Asked them if they are ok when I called them in, they said yes but feel like crap. Really sore throat, slight temperature, feel achy etc. I suggested we should rebook the appointment in the new year. Nope! Patient has a New Year’s party and they need their teeth clean for that! If I won’t see them they’ll write a complaint in as they’ve had this booked for months and I’m “not allowed to discriminate”. Lovely. So yes I can wear a mask, as we all know from Covid times they aren’t fully protective esp when you’re only 6 inches from someone’s face and they are coughing directly at you for a full half an hour. Not to mention the residual aerosol in the air for the next patient or two. That’ll be nice for me and everyone else to get sick just at Christmas. Merry Christmas.

OP posts:
DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:40

Overthebow · 23/12/2025 20:38

Would you have charged them if they had cancelled because they were sick? If not then they are being unreasonable.

As I said earlier, I am not in charge of who gets charged. And if they are, I receive exactly ZERO of that fee. I only get paid when I see a patient. So whether they get charged or not, I still get nothing.

OP posts:
RhubarbandCustardYummyYummy · 23/12/2025 20:47

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:32

Anyway. I’m just frustrated after a really really fucking long year. I’ve had 4 miscarriages over the past 2 years. I’ve had to sit on towels while treating patients as I can’t afford to keep taking time off for them. And now I finally get a break and I’ll likely be ill. I’ve just tired and quite frankly have had enough.

Honestly OP you’re totally justified in how you feel. No one outside the industry will ever really understand how challenging and stressful working in dentistry is. Everyone likes to make us out to be greedy public enemy number 1 but I know you’re just doing your best for your patients like most of us are. Hang in there and I hope you get some down time over Christmas xx

DriveVerySlowlyPastNumber23IWantThemToSeeMyHat · 23/12/2025 20:56

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:40

As I said earlier, I am not in charge of who gets charged. And if they are, I receive exactly ZERO of that fee. I only get paid when I see a patient. So whether they get charged or not, I still get nothing.

You're directing your frustrations to the wrong people. A lot of patients cannot afford to cancel and risk being deregistered. Perhaps direct your anger at greedy bosses?

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:57

DriveVerySlowlyPastNumber23IWantThemToSeeMyHat · 23/12/2025 20:56

You're directing your frustrations to the wrong people. A lot of patients cannot afford to cancel and risk being deregistered. Perhaps direct your anger at greedy bosses?

As I said I have my exit plan for getting out of dentistry. So quite honestly I don’t care anymore. It hasn’t changed in 20 year. It won’t change now.

OP posts:
RhubarbandCustardYummyYummy · 23/12/2025 20:58

DriveVerySlowlyPastNumber23IWantThemToSeeMyHat · 23/12/2025 20:56

You're directing your frustrations to the wrong people. A lot of patients cannot afford to cancel and risk being deregistered. Perhaps direct your anger at greedy bosses?

What’s greedy about a 5% profit margin? Genuine question.

youalright · 23/12/2025 21:00

I work in a shop and the amount of customers telling me how ill they are while coughing all over me is unbelievable.

pambeesleyhalpert · 23/12/2025 21:02

Before you decide to leave have a look at dental hospital jobs. I was a dental nurse before and honestly you get treated so much better and fairly in hospitals rather than privately

croydon15 · 23/12/2025 21:23

My practice takes the full amount when you book so if you don't cancel with 2 days notice you lose the full amount, it's not just the deposit it's the full amount

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 23/12/2025 21:26

Well they shouldn't but I guess it takes a squillion years to get one..

get a first defence spray and wear two masks, I guess

theunbreakablecleopatrajones · 23/12/2025 21:27

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:40

As I said earlier, I am not in charge of who gets charged. And if they are, I receive exactly ZERO of that fee. I only get paid when I see a patient. So whether they get charged or not, I still get nothing.

Yeah but the fact they (often) get charged is why they pitch up when ill, which was your original point.

Elmspringwater · 23/12/2025 21:58

You can feel how you want to op and so can we.
But most of your replies seem a little snappy.
If you want or are leaving your jop and have an exit plan good for you.
But please try to understand it from where some of us outsiders are coming from.
Wish you well in new job.

BillieWiper · 23/12/2025 22:03

Maybe this is a stupid question but how can someone have dental work done if they have a cough? Obviously they'll not be able to suppress it. What happens when they try to cough while you're working on them?

Either way it's monumentally selfish and grim to even want that when you're ill.

Frannyisreading · 23/12/2025 22:24

Sorry op, last time I was ill for a hygienist appointment i rang to cancel and was told I'd be charged for it anyway. My appointments are nearly £100 so although I didn't want to pass anything on I attended. It's not a great system 😞

Housewife2010 · 23/12/2025 22:26

BillieWiper · 23/12/2025 22:03

Maybe this is a stupid question but how can someone have dental work done if they have a cough? Obviously they'll not be able to suppress it. What happens when they try to cough while you're working on them?

Either way it's monumentally selfish and grim to even want that when you're ill.

I had a filling with a bad cough. It was very difficult suppressing it. As I wrote earlier, I rang the dentist to tell them the day before and ask if I could reschedule, but was told I would still be charged £100. I can't afford to lose £100 on top of the £200 that the filling would cost me. I would definitely have preferred not to go. They knew the situation.

Ohpleeeease · 23/12/2025 22:29

ffsrealy · 23/12/2025 10:44

Because you charge us the full price of the appointment if we cancel, you charge through the earth and remove people from your books if we don’t come to appointments.

This.

Cherrysoup · 23/12/2025 22:33

I’ll tell you why! I was at the dentist yesterday, routine check up. A mum came in with 2 dc for a’family appointment’ and told the receptionist that her dh was waiting in the car because he had a sore throat/cough/didn’t want to pass on anything to the dentist. The receptionist basically told the woman her Dh would have to go ’on the waiting list’ for future appointments ie might never get another appointment so she called him and told him to come in. Madness. He’d apparently woken up feeling rough but was fine the night before. I get it’s annoying, but surely the dentist would rather not be infected over the holiday?

Barrellturn · 23/12/2025 22:35

I've had to sit through a routine appointment with a fever and being unable to breath through my nose. But the alternative was £70 fine for not attending and risk being taken off the list.

Netcam · 23/12/2025 22:41

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:32

Anyway. I’m just frustrated after a really really fucking long year. I’ve had 4 miscarriages over the past 2 years. I’ve had to sit on towels while treating patients as I can’t afford to keep taking time off for them. And now I finally get a break and I’ll likely be ill. I’ve just tired and quite frankly have had enough.

I don't blame you, find a new career, it sounds like a nightmare.

Vitriolinsanity · 23/12/2025 22:47

Because at our dentist you’re charged. If your surgery is like mine I would lie about NYE and just about any other excuses to avoid the dripping sarcasm of the Receptionist and her utter immovably attitude.

intrepidpanda · 23/12/2025 22:47

Would she have got her money back or would it be kept for next visit if she said yes let's reschedule?
I am thinking my practice would be use it or lose it.

UncannyFanny · 23/12/2025 23:02

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 20:40

As I said earlier, I am not in charge of who gets charged. And if they are, I receive exactly ZERO of that fee. I only get paid when I see a patient. So whether they get charged or not, I still get nothing.

That doesn’t really make much difference to the patient though. They still lose out financially regardless of who gets the deposit etc if they do cancel. You asked why people attend routine appointments when they are ill, people told you why. Regardless of who gets paid at the practice, the patient still gets penalised anyway if they do cancel, and that’s why people still turn up for routine appointments when they are sick, because they know they will still be charged or fined by the practice anyway. Sorry that wasn’t what you wanted to hear.

FerrisWheelsandLilacs · 23/12/2025 23:05

vanillalattes · 23/12/2025 10:58

This. If people weren’t threatened with losing their dentist for cancelling appointments, maybe they wouldn’t show up sick 🫣

Yep, this.

DontWantToGetSick · 23/12/2025 23:11

UncannyFanny · 23/12/2025 23:02

That doesn’t really make much difference to the patient though. They still lose out financially regardless of who gets the deposit etc if they do cancel. You asked why people attend routine appointments when they are ill, people told you why. Regardless of who gets paid at the practice, the patient still gets penalised anyway if they do cancel, and that’s why people still turn up for routine appointments when they are sick, because they know they will still be charged or fined by the practice anyway. Sorry that wasn’t what you wanted to hear.

It’s still not what that particular patient told me though. She said she didn’t want to rebook because she wanted her teeth cleaned for her New Year’s party. I have no idea whether the practice would have charged her or not. Sometimes they do and sometimes they don’t. It depends on how often someone cancels. She didn’t even attempt to ring and ask.

But it’s fine. Next time I’m sick and have concert/event tickets or have a trip planned and I’m sick I won’t feel guilty if I go. Apparently if there’s a possibility you’ll lose any money on something that justifies spreading germs about.

OP posts:
Ladamesansmerci · 23/12/2025 23:13

I went because my NHS dentist said they'd strike me off, because I tried to cancel the morning of the appointment when unwell.

PurpleCyclamen · 23/12/2025 23:17

Welcomed me to my world OP. I’m a TA and parents send in kids who are in the midst of vomiting bugs because they don’t want to take time off work themselves. I’ve had plenty of ruined Christmas breaks.

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