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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

New job not great, too soon to leave?

9 replies

Stucknstoopit · 23/12/2025 01:05

I left a beloved team and boring job to go to my ideal job.
previous job was 9-5 3 days a week, many of the days at home.

I needed something more stimulating so started new job, out of the house, school hours mon~Fri.

I have a long term condition which causes pain and fatigue.
this new job suits my family life much better, I can start later and the kids come home and I’ve completely finished work and we’re free to do whatever we want after school, as opposed to my 9-5 role which meant they’re neglected they got home and cooking their own tea etc and I’d be too tired to do anything at all but I had two days off to recuperate.

it became apparent very early on that the new job isnt a great fit.
everything i stand for and the employers stand for are completely mismatched, it’s very much left me in a position where im either frequently constantly challenging, considering whistleblowing or just walking out.

lots of things aren’t as they seemed during the application and interview process and subsequent onboarding.

there’s too much to list here but I’ve given it six months as all my friends suggested and it’s not really got any better. I don’t challenge as much because I’ve already got one foot out the door but I’m not comfortable with the things I pretend to overlook.
everyone else just gets on with it and just moans behind the bosses backs.

i bloody love the work and im really proud of it especially with zero support, no induction, chaotic managers and a team of bullies and people unhappy with the hierarchy but just getting on with it, heads down.

long story short. A job has come up in my old office building, not the same as my old job but adjacent to and likely to be harder than my current job but is predominantly wfh.
im familiar with their systems, it is is less hours and more structured management and processes, its a large business rather than small business where I am now.

I’d been led to believe we were part of a larger project with partners cooperative but it transpired my boss’s are not partaking in said partnership and just maverick around the place with minimal oversight, making up rules as they go along, proper old boys network.

so, wwyd?

stay in a job you’re good at that pays well and is stimulating, hours good for the kids but you get no down time during the week to help pace yourself through illness so wiped out and can’t do anything on evenings and weekends and are constantly having to bite your tongue so you don’t look rude and disrespectful

or

try for a role somewhere you miss working (in a different team from your old one)
where you’ll work longer days but less hours and only in the office once a week
It’s less rewarding and stimulating, will be harder work but familiar work and so much more clean and structured work with oversight and protocols and all the normal things I’d expect from an employer

i haven’t even completed the application yet but wanted to mull it over on here please!

YABU = you are being unreasonable if you leave

YANBU = you are being unreasonable if you stay

OP posts:
Randomlygeneratedname · 23/12/2025 01:13

I would apply for the other job in the old company, get out from the small business! Is it family run by any chance? I'm sure there are small family run businesses that are amazing but the ones I have encountered have all been dire, and usually full of bullies.
Your environment provides a lot of your wellbeing at work, if you absolutely hate it, don't stay.

MermaidMummy06 · 23/12/2025 01:17

Leave. You owe them nothing. I work in a similar type of company now & hate it, after years of a larger organisation with proper policies. A lot of new staff leave within a few weeks/months citing a bad fit.

They do whatever they want & have one their dash in the last few weeks, as I've been kicked out of my office & will be in an airless junk room & have been given the menial work & not allowed to use my training for anything - or given any training.

It's tough finding school hours or WFH here, but I'll be out as soon as I find something!!

meganorks · 23/12/2025 01:21

At this stage it is only AIBU to apply for another job. And the answer is absolutely not. If you get offered it, then you can mull over all the positives and negatives. But there is no positive to not applying.

Power26 · 23/12/2025 01:32

leave asap, you’re most employable
right now when you’ve had recent interview experience - just leave this job off the Cv

Friendlygingercat · 23/12/2025 01:44

Why did you leave the first job? There are worse things than having a boring job that suits you in other ways. However you made the choice you made and now regret it. I would apply for the job with your old company that has come up. No need to make a choice yet. Unless/untill you get an offer its a moot point.How are you going to style it at the interview?

Springtimehere · 23/12/2025 01:54

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

chunkyBoo · 23/12/2025 08:22

I’d go back to the old place as bullying and crappy mgt can be an issue. WRT your illness, ensure you have a pension, I’m in the same boat and I’m now applying for ill health retirement as it’s all become too much working, need to sleep during the day, pain can be debilitating too but fatigue is a monster

Stucknstoopit · 24/12/2025 01:18

Thank you all for replies, I’m sorry to the poster who is in a similar situation, hope you’re able to make the changes you need asap

no idea how I’d style it out in the interview, perhaps ‘on reflection I am better suited to a role with more structured processes?’
idk, I don’t want to sounds like im slating my current role and the employer.

is not family run but a sort of cooperative with a group of friends who have little to no experience of my role except my line manager but he’s refusing to grow with the times and stated he’s insulted if ever a trainer tried to train him because

‘there’s nothing anyone can teach me, I know everything there is to know ref this business’
soooo humble ….

OP posts:
EBearhug · 24/12/2025 01:24

Left my previous job after 5 months because manager made me cry twice in a week. Been in this one a year and 3 weeks, was promoted after 10 months.

Do it.

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