To tell my sister that if she's going to be ungrateful, I'll return my nephew's Christmas gifts?

[callmelover]

My nephew is nine. I have bought for him, amongst other things, a boxset of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books. My sister asked and I told her what I got him.

She has now gone on a rant, saying the books are inappropriate for his age. When you google, the stated age range is 8-12. I read them at age 10, and loved them. She says that because they mention "butts" and kissing, and she says it's stuff she doesn't want him to know about yet. She's actually, genuinely angry about it.

AIBU to tell her that if this is how she will be, I'll send it all back?

If she had just said "thank you for the thought, but we think he's a little young for that", I would not care in the slightest. It's the sheer anger that has me thinking that I can't be bothered to deal with it.

Like he doesn’t know about butts and kissing lmao poor deluded women.

I’ve just give him the books screw her it not like you’ve ordered him 50 shades of grey or the shining.

Sounds like a bit of an over reaction.

Well I hope he doesn't watch any TV then, godforbid him seeing kissing or mentions of bums!

I'm kind of torn on what to do though. Her attitude was bad, she could have said it a lot nicer. But then if you return everything, it's your nephew that's being punished and he's got nothing to do with it. I think I'd give him any other presents you have but in future just send her cash and ask her to choose herself, so you don't dare offend her sensitivities.

Sounds like a huge over reaction. They’re kids books. I’m sure that my dds read them probably between age 8 and 10. Like he doesn’t know about butts 😂😂.

Does he go to school? Because my 4 and 7 almost 8 yr.olds know what butts are and a bit of an idea about kissing because school just exposes them to stuff. I'd be annoyed if someone bought my 7 yr old call of duty or Roblox or maybe if they got him a horror book but diary of a wimpy kid? Wouldn't blink.

YANBU to be annoyed with your sister, who is being ridiculous. If you give them to him, though, would she go so far as to take them away? If so would return them and get DN something else.

I would still give dn a gift its not his fault his mum thinks they're inappropriate (either the books or exchange for something else). My dc loved those books at that age.
My dn doesn't like reading/isn't encouraged by his parent's so every year I buy a book that may help eg loves jokes so got him a joke book, loves football so got him a skills book. Every year I hear from my dm that dn loved it but sibling didn't. This sibling moans about what I buy dn but yet never bought my child a thing! I continue to buy because its not my dn fault and I wish to treat all my dns fairly.

I wouldn't return all of nephew's gifts - not his fault that his mum is rude.
However, I would have a serious talk with my sister about her attitude and sense of entitlement. The polite response to anyone who has bought her child a gift is 'thank you', whether she approves of the gift itself, or not.
She definitely needs a conversation about her manners, if she wants people to actually bother in future!

AIBU to tell her that if this is how she will be, I'll send it all back?

Isn't that exactly what she wants you to do though? 😳

YABU

I don’t agree with your sister on the appropriateness of the books, BUT she is the parent of your nephew.

Plus, your answer to not get him anything due to his mum is immature and frankly worse behaviour than his mum.

Ask what things she would find appropriate for her child and get what he likes, return the books of you can. No need to make it more than it is.

It’s just put me in a huge grump. I’ve had a really tough year, I lost my job and had to take some time off due to health issues. But I still put money aside each month to ensure I could get him something, and this is how she reacts

My DS read them from 7 onwards - completely fine. Your sister sounds odd! What a great gift!

I’d just return the books (if you still can - if not keep them for next year?) and give him the rest of what you bought. Message sister that you’re hurt by her reaction, since you were trying to buy a nice gift, in the appropriate age range. So nephew will be getting the other gifts mentioned. I wouldn’t bother replacing the books.

Tell her to look at accelerated reader which many many schools use. Interest level 9-13 age

And will be avaliable in the classroom

My 9 year old loves these books.

These books are already on the book shelves in primary schools and your nephew will have seen his class mates reading them. He may already have read one or two himself.

The full collection is a great gift. I’d give them to him, but tell your sister it’s up to her if she lets him read them yet or not.

Edit: And also add ‘never ask me what I’ve bought anyone again!’

What a wet blanket!

Take it back and get him a set of bongo drums.

I also have an ungrateful sister and a tricky to buy for niece, so I hear you loud and clear!
I also have health issues and start budgeting for Christmas early!

I’ve generated the returns label and will drop it off tomorrow morning before work. It’s just annoying because I only have about £30 left in my budget before pay day. I’d hoped to treat myself to a nice little ready meal dinner but it’s going on a new main present for him instead. I know I’m really selfish for being annoyed about it, but I’d hoped to treat myself.

Return it but dont replace it.

Youre not being selfish. Your sister is being so weird. What's wrong with her?

Id have just given him them anyway.

They’ll be in the school library anyway.

And some parents wonder why kids grow up and dont act the bloody age, instead they act like kids in their 20s, because parens baby to much.
I was reading mills and boon books at 9, didnt turn me in to a whore.

Agreed!

If returning the item, buy something ‘loud’, make her regret not accepting the books!

Don't buy him anything else! Or if you must, a £5 selection box or something. She complains, he loses out.