Neighbour Noise - Stair Thumping

[SMLSML]

Probably my third post on this and I go back and forth on it, what would you do? We had new neighbours move in back last July, never heard the old ones (in a semi with the hall and stairs joined down the party wall). Heard them up and down the stairs straight away, lots of thumping. Didn't say anything as wanted to stay on good terms... The last week or so it's really ramped up, so loud and thumping, can be any time of the day and until 10pm at night. Sometimes wakes my youngest as she's got the room that shares the wall with them... We are on friendly terms, would you say anything? Really don't want to ruin the relationship but currently feel on edge in my own house, trying to chill in the evenings and hearing constant banging is just awful 😫 they're a family of 4 with two boys under 7

How would you expect them to use the stairs without making any noise though ? Kids are noisy too. Now you’re sensitive to the noise - you will notice it even more !
Maybe they’ve removed the carpet ?

What are you hoping to achieve? They can't stop going upstairs.

Have they changed the flooring? Removed wallpaper?

Hopefully, it is just because they are decorating and once they lay a new floor or put up new wallpaper, it will dampen the noise again, but if not, I'm afraid this kind of noise is just part of having neighbours.

Welcome to my world. Our neighbours, with two boys, are the same and have wooden stairs so the noise is horrendous. Even my children can’t believe the noise. It’s horrible and you have my sympathies.

I have had terrible problems in the past with noisy neighbours and honestly the only thing that worked for me was to move.

Do they have carpet on their stairs OP? If not, I'd have a word and ask them if they could consider it, as you've noticed since they moved in that you hear them every time they go up and down, but didn't when the last lot were there.

If they do have carpet, I think I'd be inclined to say in passing one day, 'do you hear us going up and down stairs as much as we hear you, only we've noticed since you moved in that we hear you going up and down all the time, which on occasion wakes my youngest, so I just wondered if we're disturbing you too? Then see what they say. If they say they don't hear you, then ask them if there's anything they can do to make it a bit quieter, and point out that you didn't used to hear the last neighbours.

Our old neighbours had the same age kids and we never heard them on the stairs at all so it can be done 😅 they've definitely got to be very heavy footed 😅

I have two sons and they have to be reminded soft feet!
Probably worth having a friendly word with the neighbour, if they are generally nice they are probably oblivious to the upset it’s causing you.

Awful isn't it. How do you switch off to it? I find it impossible to relax 🫠 we've got two kids under 5 and we don't have them stomp really loudly as we know we share a wall 😫 which makes me think as they probably don't hear us we don't hear them and that the soundproofing is better than it is actually is 🙃

Yeah I think that's all it needs but I'm worried about upsetting the relationship. Think the issue is our kids are pretty soft footed and we've made sure they've grown up knowing not to charge up and down the stairs so if they're not hearing us they have no idea how loud it actually is 😭

We’re in a middle terrace and can hear our neighbors going up and down their stairs, and I’m sure they can hear us too. DD (20) has always been a stair thumper for some reason and when she visits, I remind her to tread lightly! DS (17) is far quieter. These are Edwardian terraces with fairly thick walls.

One couple is having a baby in a few weeks so I expect we’ll be hearing a lot more noise then. 😂 I’d say something lighthearted to your neighbors about hearing noise on the stairs and that you expect that they can hear you as well.

I had an older couple next door and hardly heard them. Now a young family live next door and generate a lot of noise I wasn’t used to before. Different people live differently and move around differently. This is unfortunately a downside of living on top of each other. It’s impossible not to have some noise transference. Truthfully it is probably better to try and just accept what essentially is every day noise and try not to focus so much on the day to day stuff to a point of hypersensitivity, and save your annoyance for the bigger stuff.

I don't think you can fly up stairs. Yabu. I used to live in a terrace it's part and parcel of the house. I know we were as noisy as our neighbours were. They is nothing you can do. It's case of live and let live. Yabu

@UncannyFanny You are spot on. As I type Im annoyed by the feint music coming from the flat upstairs. They have friends round, and its not even 9.30 on a Saturday night… I need to give my head a wobble!

You're not being unreasonable op, it is possible to get up and down stairs without stomping, I'm afraid we went down the pass ag route of stomping up the stairs ourselves when the neighbours were letting their kids run up and down the stairs..... It stopped.

I live in a small Victorian terrace that does not have great soundproofing but I never hear my neighbour on one side. On the other side I have a neighbour who has been quite noisy in the past but when I once had a conversation with her she confirmed she never could hear me and my dd! So it’s very much the case that some people are just noisy.

I feel your pain OP. When the flat upstairs from me was being renovated they said that they were surprised there was nothing in the lease about having wood flooring as they were putting it in, and that their daughter was really heavy footed. They weren't kidding. Fucking Twinkletoes stomps around everywhere and slams her front door which is right next to my bed and yes she goes out early and it wakes me up every fucking time. My hallway light has become loose and is falling out because of her stomping and slamming and it gives me the rage 😡