To Already Know a Male Colposcopist Is Going to be Horrible?

29 replies

AnOldLadyWhoLovesCheeseToasties · 19/12/2025 18:07

I'm one of those lucky women who are referred for a colposcopy every 12 months - so far, so good, & I'm incredibly lucky to benefit from the UK screening programme due to various risk factors.

HOWEVER, I found out today the amazing, truly wonderful female doc who's performed my colposcopies and various biopsies over the years has now left - & there is now an older male doctor, and I assumed from the second I saw him I was in trouble, & I was right.

No reassurance, zero explaining what he was doing, no warning about applying the dye as I'd thought was the norm to ensure I wasn't scared & didn't flinch from the cold sensation. Then when he decided to take a biopsy, there was zero notice or advice about breathing in / coughing to lessen the pain. My last 2 pairly hurt, this felt agonising & I actually shouted in pain as he continued to dig around for about twice the time of any previous biopsy.

He then proceeded to explain how important it was to have a 'decent' sample, but didn't mention the fact I was close to tears - & I'm really not a low pain threshold kinda person, it was bloody brutal.

The wonderful nurses were as amazing as ever, but AITA to KNOW when I see an older male doctor I may as well just go home because the lack of any shred of gentleness or care simply doesn't exist?

OP posts:

Original poster

AnOldLadyWhoLovesCheeseToasties · 19/12/2025 21:23

MatriarchCaz · 19/12/2025 21:04

I had a Colposcopy when I was 17(now in my 50's) She was horrible. Told me it was my fault I was there as I smoked (I don't now) and then had a go at me as I dripped blood on the floor after a biopsy while still in stirups.

Equally had a horrid Hysteroscopy by a male who used no local anesthetic and looked annoyed that the biopsy of my womb lining hurt like a bugger.

Sadly it can be either sex that are awful for performing these procedures 😡

Edited

Just to say that I'm so very sorry - that sounds unbearable, you're clearly a warrior woman who should've been treated with SO much more kindness - & here I am moaning about a colposcopy! 🙄

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Fernsrus · 19/12/2025 21:27

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BelaLug0si · 19/12/2025 21:31

mindutopia · 19/12/2025 19:42

I mean, he may be rubbish, but I ended up being referred to a male gynaecologist when my female one moved away. He was probably 70 and very old school. He was fantastic. He got out the microscope and looked at my samples himself there and then and could reassure me about a treatment plan. He was so good that when a new (female) doctor joined the department and they offered I could see her instead, I refused and stayed with him. He was so much more respectful and professional.

"He got out the microscope and looked at my samples himself there and then and could reassure me about a treatment plan"

Both cervical cytology and histology samples require processing in a laboratory. Very few gynaecologists are also qualified pathologists.
Could you give a little more information about how a gynaecologist processed the sample and did the microscopic assessment in the gynae clinic please?

Original poster

AnOldLadyWhoLovesCheeseToasties · 19/12/2025 21:31

Bushmillsbabe · 19/12/2025 21:18

Sorry you had a horrible experience OP, hope you are feeling OK now.

It can be very easy to generalise based on experience. A bit different, but I have had 2 forceps deliveries. The first one, an older male dr sewed me up afterwards, and he did it so 'tight' I struggled to have sex for a couple years afterwards - found out later that it's called a 'husband stitch' - extra stitch to make things 'tight and more pleasurable for the husband'. No proof of course, he could have just been a bit rubbish at his job rather than being a misogynistic arse. But because misogyny is still so prevalent in healthcare it can feel like all negative behaviour by male drs is due to that, when sometimes they are equally rubbish to both makes and females.

Edited

This is such a valuable perspective, thank you, & also WTAF? I'm very sorry to hear about your experience, which puts my mild pain into real-world context ❤️

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