Love my husband but think I fancy another man?

[Hiits]

So, I love my husband so much, I would never cheat on him. He works very long hours so I don’t have to work and can be here for the kids, we have 3 under 5, he lets me sleep in every weekend and lets me buy anything I want, never talks about money. Our money is ours, no matter who’s earned it.

He is a bit grumpy when he comes home as he’s tired from a 15 hour day. Hardly sleeps,
something I feel neglected.

Recently, I have found myself attracted to a school dad, I haven’t spoken to him, never would. I wouldn’t entertain anything. Is this strange? Is this not normal? Why have I felt like this when I love my husband so much?

It sounds like your husband is the one who is neglected.

Just because you're on a diet doesn't mean you can't look in the baker's shop window

You're fine. Everyone's allowed a little fantasy in their head. That's where it should stay. My friend fancied someone from afar. Until she spoke to him. She found his voice really unattractive and that was that. She never intended to act on it. It's just a crush or literacy and will fade away. Doesn't mean you love your dh any less.

Everything you say about your husband is a positive. If nothing else, everytime a thought enters your head about the school Dad, try imagining how you'd feel if it were your husband feeling that about a school mum or colleague or random woman. Not a great feeling. It's easy to get caught up in our own heads especially when life although busy, isn't as full as it could be. But look at the positives you have and consider how losing that would feel. Plus..the school Dad is just that, a Dad who is as flawed as everyone else..finding people attractive is fine, but put your energy elsewhere.

It’s normal over the span of any LTR to find other people attractive so don’t feel guilty for that. What I would say is you just sound lonely to be honest and so I guess this stems from that. Your DH is working long hours so isn’t really around and you have three very small children which can be isolating in itself. It’s probably more that than anything.

It’s normal to think someone is attractive. It’s a passing thought and meaningless. However acting on it would be silly when actually you need to work on the relationship with your husband. He sounds exhausted and tired. Can he work shorter days or can he work a four day week and you can find paid work around his schedule?

I get frequent crushes, always have, regardless of my relationship status!
it absolutley doesn’t mean I don’t adore and fancy my husband, because I do very much!
as long as you’re not having fanciful thoughts about how superior your life would be with the other person then I think it’s all good!