1000 is not enough, 1 is too many

[ChristmassyCheers]

I'm drinking too much. Every night, it makes me feel good, I'm not trying to escape anything. Can I go to the GP and ask for help and would they be obliged to put it on my record? AIBU to ask for help? I just want to stop drinking as I know it's bad for me, and expensive.
I need tools to help, has anyone got a suggestion, I'm desparate

Great start but do try to make a real life F2F commitment when you feel able too. They are a safe space, Im looking at going there myself in the new year as Ive found a f2f meeting within driving distance

having anything on your medical record will affect your life insurance also

Look up

Change, grow, live

in you area - very non judgemental

Look into Bee Sober. Join the membership. Less than I was spending on alcohol every day for a month of support.

You absolutely can do it. I was drinking 3 bottles of wine a day, every day. I am coming up to 3 years sober in the spring. If I can do it, anyone can do it.

I can’t tell you how much easier life is. No alcohol noise at all. I don’t even think about it. I’m 16 kg lighter and I’ve saved over £10k last I added it all up.

You don’t actually drink a lot Have you tried stopping or cutting down? Try that first. As you drink wine bottles the easiest way to do this is by reducing the size of and number of bottles you buy.

Its not a huge amount but its too much as you say OP

So that suggests it might be doable to have a reduction plan of your own while using the self help resources suggested here. GP wont do anything and wont be able to offer meds or anything like that, you wont be viewed as a misuser or problem drinker. And you're probably not either.

Some people can get into the habit of daily drinking but are not actually addicted to, they can use a technique that works for them to reduce or eliminate, eg introducing alcohol free days and rewarding yourself with the money you have saved on non alcoholic treats. Others are actually addicted and cannot cut down without help.

the addiction boards here are a good starting point, try setting goals and see what happens along side support here. If that isn’t sufficient try AA but some people do need help from their GP and there is no shame, asking for help is a good thing

Good advice, OP can you start with setting a rota for a drink, so one night off, then another, then another

Then move to buying mini bottles and set a target of 3 nights a week with a drink but it will come from the mini bottle. Just the one.

Read Catherine Gray unexpected joy of being sober. Two days later started my journey and six years later still sober

It’s 42+ units of alcohol a week! 14 or less is the recommended amount…. How is that not ‘a lot’? It’s an enormous amount.

This attitude of “that’s not enough alcohol to be a problem” can stop people from seeking help when they need it (especially my ExH). The OP says it is a problem for them so please accept that, your response comes across as saying “well that’s nothing…” which is very much a typical behaviour of an alcoholic personality

I drank exactly the same amounts as you. I'm now over 18 months sober. I had tried to reduce/stop a few times before but eventually I had just had enough of feeling awful every morning. I tried AA but it didn't work for me, I couldn't find enough common ground between myself and the stories that were told, if anything it allowed me to believe I didn't have a problem. What really worked was endless quit lit audio books (particularly Quit Like a Woman), mainlining alcohol free beer for the first couple of months, lots of exercise, and getting a private therapist who works in addiction services to keep me accountable. Honestly from four months onwards it was pretty plain sailing. I don't miss it at all and am perfectly happy to socialise with others who are drinking without being tempted. Still see my therapist but we don't talk about alcohol anymore as it doesn't feature in my life 🙂 You can totally do it, and it doesn't need to be a big deal or something you're battling with forever.

She is seeking help?

But if you mean via the GP I can tell you now the GP will simply give the advice given here anyway.

Half a bottle every night is around 35 units. Recommended is under 14 units per week. I drink about half a bottle at the weekend! Everyday is a lot and OP needs help.

I think with something like wine it becomes habitual rather than a full blown dependency. Obviously this is different for people who drink it all day or who have 3 bottles a day or whatever but for most, if it isn’t strong spirits then it’s likely a habit rather than addiction and is easier to break.

I just had to do it last month. I saw a photo of myself and my face was like the moon, totally bloated. I’d recognised for months that I was drinking too much- around 4-5 bottles of red a week but whenever it got to the evening, it was wine time and that was how I unwound. It was clearly unhealthy and hit me when I saw my face in someone else’s pics. Also expensive as you say.

I stopped all together for the first couple of weeks which were the hardest. Since then I’ve been having maybe 2-3 glasses a week at the weekend but never the full bottle. Didn’t reach out for help, just cold turkey’d it. It’s been fine to be honest, I don’t even enjoy it as much now when I have those glasses. You can do it, just takes willpower and a desire to change like anything.

Seek help. Its not so much the quantity, its the dependence of having it every day.

Can you try buying non or low alcohol wine or a cbd drink or something you enjoy, and picking one day a week where you drink that instead? It can be hard to break even the habits of pouring the glass. Just one? If you can't manage it, initially try one glass of alcoholic wine then make yourself swap to non alcoholic second glass.

Or some people do better with nothing. Take monday. Try and just do monday with nothing. Just monday.

Then try to build to more days.

And OP? Well done for recognising the issue. That's the part so many people simply can't do, it takes a lot to own it. You've got this.

OP, I'm not in the same boat but one thing that helps me stay off alcohol altogether for at least 4 nights a week is having a fitbit that tracks sleep stats. What alcohol does to a body overnight when it's supposed to be having downtime and recharging everything is enough to make me think twice. While you're asleep, your heart is banging away at as much as 20 beats a minute more than it should be at resting pace. It's essentially shortening your life and there's nothing like seeing that in black and white stats to help with staying off the booze.

Having non alcoholic alternatives in the house to drink is another good idea and if it helps to have that drink in a wine glass, so be it. Your issue sounds habit based, rather than full blown addiction. Once you realise how much better you can sleep without alcohol in your system, it will hopefully become much easier to drop 1 night, then 2 nights etc. Small steps that then become habits in themselves. Good luck.

@ChristmassyCheers Sorry I haven’t read the entire thread, so someone may have already suggested this. What worked for me was reading Kick the Drink…Easily by Jason Vale. This book changed
my life and I can’t recommend it enough.
You can change and you will.

20 beats a minute?

@soupyspoon 20 beats a minute MORE. An overnight heart rate is usually around 3 to 4 beats a minute below your resting heart rate. So if your resting heart rate is 63, your heart will generally beat around 60 beats a minute overnight. With a few glasses of booze inside you, your heart is likely banging away at 83 beats a minute all night long. That is a significant difference.

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Missed that bit and was thinking you'd be almost dead with a heart rate of 20 beats a minute!!!