To want to go back to the Northwest to live.

[redange]

I was, born raised and educated until 18 in Kent, then left and went to Keele University in 1992. I lived firstly in a house with DH near Keele University where I met him from 1993 and only left North Cheshire until 2017. I moved with DH and three children to Essex for business and elderly parents. Since, 2017 and moving I have become increasingly bored living in Essex. I feel like despite living equal time in the North and South, that I am an Alien in the South.

left North Cheshire in 2017 to move to Essex for Business and family reasons.

Does DH want to move?

Sounds like you feel that “home” is Cheshire, and if you feel strongly connected to that place, what’s stopping you from going back?

im also from NW England but couldn’t wait to get away and hate going back, but I know that I’m a bit weird, home to me is wherever I happen to live at any one time.

so if you’re yearning to go back home, I’d say go for it 😊

What's your AIBU?
Details missing here!

YANBU for wanting to live in the North West.

I live in the Nw…I love it…near to cities of Liverpool, Manchester and Chester…an hour from the Dales, the Lakes and North Wales ….Manchester and Liverpool airports on the doorstep….2 hours by train to London….and cheap housing …come back !

YANBU… my parents were northerners but I was brought up in Essex. Fortunately DHs work brought us north, first to North Yorkshire and then to Lancashire. There’s so much great countryside and wildlife in all directions. I’ve no desire ever to set foot in Essex again tbh. Maybe it has some redeeming features?

YANBU but it doesn’t sound realistic if your caring responsibilities are still there or your husband and kids don’t want the same thing

I grew up down south but am much happier living in Cheshire. YANBU

I think what it is from the ages of 19-44 you define who you are, what you are and making friends is a lot easier. On the outside I have a very 'desirable' and comfortable life in Essex, but I still don't have many friends in Essex and don't know the area very well. In contrast I now the Northwest 'inside' out from the Lakes all the way to Peak District and Stoke (Not Northwest I know). DH is a Northerner who was educated at Shrewsbury School but is adamant about staying in Essex, this is because he runs the Southern section of a inter-generational family business. At first it seemed that it would be perfect, i would be near Mum and Dad who had early onset Dementia (though hid it in a very cunning way) and mum who was struggling with his mood changes. Dad has been in a care home for 4 years now and my Mum who is 82 is fine and well provided for. I assumed the responsibility for them as elder sister is tied up in Lincolnshire being both a Teacher and Farmer.

Despite the good intentions of the move I was so 'lonely' that every 2 months I would try to get up to the Northwest to visit friends. This, is very difficult now because of the Children who are in year 11,10 and 9 who are at pivotal stages of development and education. I feel I cannot go up to see friends at the moment, due to the fact the children do not want to come and stay at someones house for two days.

The other problem being that the children are very integrated and the two girls present themselves like 'Arabella' and Lottie i.e very Upper Middle Class Southern Girls. My adopted (kinship) DS tries to mimic DH's 'Mockney' Manchester accent, especially noticeable when DH is 'Swearing' watching football. Hence, I have told DH if his Swearing does not stop during the upcoming World Cup he will need to watch it somewhere else.

Essex has loads of nice countryside and some really gorgeous villages. Also lots of fascinating history and heritage.

What’s your AIBU, OP? Is there conflict between your DH and you over where you live?

I live at the very top of the northwest in Cumbria, there's a lot going for it but being this far North does mean it can be hard to get anywhere and the nearest big city is more than an hour away. That said, it's peaceful, northern people have a great sense of humour and are friendly and crime is low.

🤔 not got a scoobie what you are on about now?

I went to Manchester uni and lived there for 11 years.

I’d go back in a shot. There’s something special about the North West. I still get homesick for it 31 years later.

I feel I cannot go up to see friends at the moment, due to the fact the children do not want to come and stay at someones house for two days.

Why do they need to go with you? If your DH is there, surely they're old enough to manage without you for a couple of days? And you'd have a better time with your friends without them.

DH is not reliable to be there when the children get back home from school. He literally could need to go anywhere in Europe with a phone call. Hence, why I am unable to leave the children at present.

I moved away from the NW a few years ago and I always think I want to move back but whenever I go up I think I’m over it. It’s too damp and Manchester is not how I remember it. I do miss my friends and connections though so I understand the loneliness aspect. I’ve not made many new friends either.

Born in Liverpool, grew up on the Wirral, raised children in Warrington, taught and lived in Chester.

Now I live in France, but my 2 best friends are in the NW and now my children are producing children I come over (to my 2nd husband's irritation) every other month and have a whirlwind week seeing friends, family and babies.

I just love Liverpool and Chester. The public transport system is amazing.

However I can't afford to move back on my own, and I don't think my husband ever wants to move back!

THIS! ^ I don't live too far from you... (I suspect so, as I am not a millions miles from Chester!) And I love it!

Come back @redange