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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Man slapping child

80 replies

Yorks2Lancs7 · 13/12/2025 20:09

I am going to preface this by saying I do not have children. But I grew up in a not pleasant household.

tonight I was having a drink with my partner at a train station pub, I saw a man slap his child round the face (probably 5 years old) I spoke out, the mother said ‘he didn’t slap her on the FACE’ I said he did, I saw it, you are a terrible mother. She then came towards me to try and fight me but I went in the bar. I told my partner and although he was proud of me he told me given current aggression in the UK I should stay out of it. WWYD?

OP posts:
RessicaJabbit · 13/12/2025 20:15

You'll probably have got the mother into trouble at home with him... Making him look bad.

If he hits his kid,a, and she minimises it... he probably does the same thing to her

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 13/12/2025 20:17

Yes, I think you had to speak out. Regardless of the consequences, children need us to step in.

But he’ll be vile to them once he’s in private.

me24x · 13/12/2025 20:17

That is absolutely disgusting. He probably beats the mother too. Good on you for speaking out I know I would have. However, scum like that will never think they’re in the wrong. If you haven’t already, call the police and report this hopefully they can find the child. Poor girl

Zanatdy · 13/12/2025 20:18

I’d have spoken out too. Can you report the incident? Maybe CCTV able to identify them.

kenadams5 · 13/12/2025 20:19

I’d have called the police if I witnessed an adult slap a young child round the face. I’m not sure the intervening really helped.

Seawolves · 13/12/2025 20:20

I wouldn't speak to the parents, I know only too well that someone doing that often leads to even worse treatment at home but I would report it to the transport police in this situation.

Freeme31 · 13/12/2025 20:21

Yes you were right to call him out. If he’d be in Scotland he’d be charged

mrssunshinexxx · 13/12/2025 20:21

I would of followed them to address and called the police and SS to report,
VILE

Kibble19 · 13/12/2025 20:22

I wouldn’t have stayed quiet either. People will always give it “you just put the mother in danger tonight” but what alternative does someone have? Avert their eyes and pretend they didn’t see?

Call the police, the pub will have CCTV and can track them down.

kittywittyandpretty · 13/12/2025 20:22

You know those constant reminders that you hear on the train see it say it sort it
This is one of those things that you need to say it and they will sort it

kittywittyandpretty · 13/12/2025 20:23

Freeme31 · 13/12/2025 20:21

Yes you were right to call him out. If he’d be in Scotland he’d be charged

You won’t get away with that in England either

Marble10 · 13/12/2025 20:27

Well done OP, not many people would speak out. Poor girl 😢 upsetting and sickening knowing this happens every day to children.

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 13/12/2025 20:27

mrssunshinexxx · 13/12/2025 20:21

I would of followed them to address and called the police and SS to report,
VILE

She went for the OP. You think stalking them to their house is a good idea?

Freeme31 · 13/12/2025 20:28

@kittywittyandpretty sorry i meant it is illegal to smack a child in Scotland, where they have full protection from assault, but in England, a parent can still use "reasonable physical punishment," though it's illegal if it causes injury like bruising or marks, think Scotland has it right

nomas · 13/12/2025 20:30

Why didn’t you call the father a terrible father?

YABU for your sexism.

Original poster
Yorks2Lancs7 · 13/12/2025 20:32

nomas · 13/12/2025 20:30

Why didn’t you call the father a terrible father?

YABU for your sexism.

The mother was sticking up for the father. It was a knee jerk reaction. They are both pond scum

OP posts:
Pavementworrier · 13/12/2025 20:36

I would mind my own business tbh (I appreciate this is deeply unfashionable now)

kittywittyandpretty · 13/12/2025 20:37

Freeme31 · 13/12/2025 20:28

@kittywittyandpretty sorry i meant it is illegal to smack a child in Scotland, where they have full protection from assault, but in England, a parent can still use "reasonable physical punishment," though it's illegal if it causes injury like bruising or marks, think Scotland has it right

I don’t think any police officer would consider slapping a five-year-old around the face reasonable force. The ones I know would take action if there was CCTV footage

Original poster
Yorks2Lancs7 · 13/12/2025 20:37

Thankyou everyone for your responses. The way the pub is set up it’s next to the platform and I was having a cigarette (my alcohol vice) and I saw them coming down the stairs to the train. I am not confident there is CCTV covering that area but I will report it. Thankyou for your responses. I know it opens it up for more aggression by someone speaking out but I hope it gave them food for thought that this incident was witnessed.

OP posts:
Pollqueen · 13/12/2025 20:40

Poor baby 😢 I like to think I would have called the police but appreciate things sometimes happen so fast and hindsight is a wonderful thing

CharlotteFlax · 13/12/2025 20:42

I'm sure there is CCTV on a railway footbridge at a station. Please report it now.

TiredofLDN · 13/12/2025 20:42

I’ve twice stepped in when I’ve seen a child being abused in public.

The first time a woman slapped her 3 or 4 year old hard
around the back of the head in a park. The woman she was with who looked like was possibly her sister, kicked off, screaming and swearing at me. I pulled my phone out to record her and they fucked off.

The second was when I saw a man in the street lift his clenched fist to strike his early teen daughter after she did something silly like bang on a street bin, as they passed me in the street- he stopped when I shouted at him when the arm went back. Girl was cowering. It was awful. That was a very odd one… Whole family out, mum, dad, two kids and grandparents…. Dad looked shamefaced when I intervened. Older woman kicked off MASSIVELY. Really shouted at me, and used the excuse that the teen girl was “autistic and you have no idea how hard it is, how dare you judge us.” Well- no, I don’t know how hard it is to parent a child with a high level of needs, but I can imagine as I have autistic family members - and I also know you don’t fucking punch any child. (Also I didn’t judge anyone- I shouted “don’t you dare- I can see you. Stop.”)

Both times what was incredible to me was that violence against the children was clearly normalized in the family unit. And it just depressed the hell out of me. Also felt very worried I’d done the wrong thing by intervening.

Lilactimes · 13/12/2025 20:49

TiredofLDN · 13/12/2025 20:42

I’ve twice stepped in when I’ve seen a child being abused in public.

The first time a woman slapped her 3 or 4 year old hard
around the back of the head in a park. The woman she was with who looked like was possibly her sister, kicked off, screaming and swearing at me. I pulled my phone out to record her and they fucked off.

The second was when I saw a man in the street lift his clenched fist to strike his early teen daughter after she did something silly like bang on a street bin, as they passed me in the street- he stopped when I shouted at him when the arm went back. Girl was cowering. It was awful. That was a very odd one… Whole family out, mum, dad, two kids and grandparents…. Dad looked shamefaced when I intervened. Older woman kicked off MASSIVELY. Really shouted at me, and used the excuse that the teen girl was “autistic and you have no idea how hard it is, how dare you judge us.” Well- no, I don’t know how hard it is to parent a child with a high level of needs, but I can imagine as I have autistic family members - and I also know you don’t fucking punch any child. (Also I didn’t judge anyone- I shouted “don’t you dare- I can see you. Stop.”)

Both times what was incredible to me was that violence against the children was clearly normalized in the family unit. And it just depressed the hell out of me. Also felt very worried I’d done the wrong thing by intervening.

You're incredible @TiredofLDN

BriefEncountersOfTheThirdKind · 13/12/2025 20:52

Kibble19 · 13/12/2025 20:22

I wouldn’t have stayed quiet either. People will always give it “you just put the mother in danger tonight” but what alternative does someone have? Avert their eyes and pretend they didn’t see?

Call the police, the pub will have CCTV and can track them down.

No, you don't ignore it but you also don't confront someone who is that openly abusive to a child. You put yourself in danger, you put the child in danger and you put the partner in danger

Report. That's the safest thing to do

JustWantsSomeSleep · 13/12/2025 20:53

You did the right thing. Not speaking out is perpetuating the problem.