That so many parents try to weaponise Xmas

Sadgrinch · 2025-12-09T20:29:17+00:00

Multiple trending threads about parents not coping so saying they won't give their kids any presents at Xmas. To me it feels so depressing. Parenting is hard, but it's a job 365 days of the year. Aibu to feel that if you're using what should be a happy family day as leverage or punishment something has gone seriously wrong?

sprigatito · 09/12/2025 20:30

I think a TAAT at this point is a bit mean spirited, and I don’t think it will achieve much.

Lookingforthejoy · 09/12/2025 20:34

I know the threads you mean.

They all sound like desperate parents and carers who are struggling to access support. I have ND child who has been really struggling for the last 9 months, with a signifigant impact on her ability to be physical and mentally healthly, access social activities and education. DH and I are highly educated assertive people and I have a strong background in the education sector and we’ve struggled to get educational and health care staff to listen and there is very little help out there even if you’re able to know where to go to request it.

myglowupera · 09/12/2025 20:40

YANBU. Same with birthdays. I wonder if giving their child a rubbish Christmas will magically make all the problems go away or if it magnify them.

Original poster

Sadgrinch · 09/12/2025 20:40

Lookingforthejoy · 09/12/2025 20:34

I know the threads you mean.

They all sound like desperate parents and carers who are struggling to access support. I have ND child who has been really struggling for the last 9 months, with a signifigant impact on her ability to be physical and mentally healthly, access social activities and education. DH and I are highly educated assertive people and I have a strong background in the education sector and we’ve struggled to get educational and health care staff to listen and there is very little help out there even if you’re able to know where to go to request it.

That sounds incredibly tough. Your DD is incredibly lucky to have you advocating for her. It just makes me very sad that parent, no matter how run down, go to cancelling Xmas as an answer to a medical issue.

OP posts:

Lookingforthejoy · 09/12/2025 20:44

My child isn’t violent in anyway but I don’t think anyone who isn’t in the situation can full appreciate the pressure it puts on families. I imagine if you have schools and others not understanding the situation it would be much more difficult.

Heyhelga · 09/12/2025 20:45

Yep happens soooo much. It's sad really.

Fiftyandme · 09/12/2025 20:46

Lookingforthejoy · 09/12/2025 20:34

I know the threads you mean.

They all sound like desperate parents and carers who are struggling to access support. I have ND child who has been really struggling for the last 9 months, with a signifigant impact on her ability to be physical and mentally healthly, access social activities and education. DH and I are highly educated assertive people and I have a strong background in the education sector and we’ve struggled to get educational and health care staff to listen and there is very little help out there even if you’re able to know where to go to request it.

This times a thousand.