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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to not want to keep lending things out that are never returned?

2 replies

VickyL84 · 09/12/2025 00:03

My partner has 2 grown up sons and I treat them like my own, the oldest has a gf and they have just had a baby. We are very close and the oldest son and his gf lived with us for a time. This didn’t end well as the gf is very difficult to live with, although we all get on now and see them a lot now they have had the baby. They come and stay with us and we stay with them on a regular basis. The gf is constantly hinting that they have no money, and is always asking to borrow things of mine, for example iPhone chargers, lashes, my hair dryer, etc etc, I sometimes don’t always get these things back, she ‘forgets’ and takes them home. So last time she asked to borrow something I said no. My dp then went behind my back and offered to lend it to her anyway, and she was like ‘no thanks cos I was made to feel guilty for asking’. I was in earshot and she knew it. I’m just sick of being taken for a mug and wondered AIBU? I am annoyed at both of them now and made to look like the bad guy when she is always playing the victim and so hard done by! They do nothing but take take take.

OP posts:
Runrunrudolph · 09/12/2025 00:12

I don't blame you for putting your foot down about this really cheeky entitled behaviour.

I think you should discuss this with your partner. It's not his place to give your things to other people. If he wants to subsidise his son and his gf then thats up to him but there is no way youshould be forced into doing so.

NarnianQueen · 09/12/2025 10:03

You could just say “yeah, because I don’t get them back!”

It’s pretty simple, even she and your dp should get it!

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