Tat for Xmas? How to get around it with kids?

[Fussyeater321]

MIL is a shopperholic/ultimate bargain hunter she also leaves the full price on and takes off the sale sticker.

I can only imagine she goes through the clearance selection, sees something for a huge discount then once she gets it home works out who is going to. One of the gifts DH got for his birthday was a fishing tackle bag (he’s the opposite to an outdoorsy person and has zero intention of ever going fishing)…

She also posts on xmas Eve her huge mountain of gifts to give to the family on FB. Definitely quantity over quality.

Now the first year I got with DH he instructed me that his drill was to put spare bin bags in the boot and then only bring in what we actually like/want as everything else gets bagged up for charity.

Over the years the ‘presents’ have been ridiculous. At first I thought DH was ungrateful but overtime it’s the only way to not clutter up our home with junk. Especially now we’ve got DD, it’s a steady stream of junk/just unthoughtful tat.

DH has offered MIL a Christmas list of suggestions for DD but apparently DD has all ‘surprises’ which translates into junk that you won’t need but I thought was a good deal.

Now, I’m getting slightly concerned that DD is getting older and it’s not really teaching her to be grateful/will likely leak what we do but also, I don’t want to be home to at least two bin bags of toys and a large gift just for the sake of it. We also don’t have a huge house and I try to me mindful to not have a cluttered home MIL buys the most pink, princessy toys as she never had a daughter…

Honestly, if she's posting it, keep one or two things and donate/sell the rest. Just don't let on at this stage. (I'm assuming your DD is toddler age ish?)

If she's giving it in person that's more tricky. Personally I'd set out very clearly that you don't have room for more than, say, 4 things but I know this isn't easy. If/ when DD is older you could say something like 'she was sad she didn't receive (xyz thing) she had her heart set on' then maybe next time she might pay more attention?!

I would be honest with your MIL and tell her that she is wasting her money, that you don't have room for the volume of gifts she is buying and can she please stick to one or two gifts as the rest will just end up being donated. If she is upset, tell her the only reason you are raising it with her is because you care about her and don't like to see her wasting money on stuff you don't need or want.

If she continues with the same behaviour, there's really nothing you can do except donate all the stuff you don't want. It sounds like she has a problem, excessive shopping is often a symptom of greater mental health issues and she may not find it easy to stop.