Dirty dishes

[ScottishHaggis85]

I have a housemate. Iv asked them several times now to please clean any cutlery/ plates bowls etc they use properly as they have been leaving bits of food on them still after placing them in the dish drainer - their still doing it now after being asked several times. I think they just don’t think :/ but there is washing supplies there.
What should my next move be as I don’t want to upset them but I can’t communally share cutlery / kitchen items with someone leaving them with food bits on?

Obviously depends on your specific set up but I would be opting for separate utensils…

"Hi Housemate, can I speak to you for a minute? This plate (pick it up and show it to them) has got food still stuck on it. I'd really appreciate it it if you'd double check things are properly cleaned. I don't have time to keep re-washing things before I use them!" Big smile.
And repeat. Every. Single. Time. Until the pain of you outweighs the pain of doing the job properly.

This is the problem iv done this several times& it’s not going in at all :/ iv literally just left a dirty fork & bowl with bits on a piece of paper for her with a note saying Please wash everything you use properly & this keeps happening so something isn’t clicking but I don’t want to be rude

Would it be rude of me at this point when they’ve been here a while to sort out a pile of utensils cutlery etc & leave them with a note and/or text to follow to say Let’s keep separate utensils here are yours

I think I’d start putting the dirty stuff in their bedroom!

Perhaps they have always had a dishwasher and no one has ever taught them to wash up properly! In his day and age not knowing how would not surprise me…..

Over the age of 50 ?

I'd keep a set just for myself , obviously not really practical with pans / roasting tins / cooking utensils but plates, cups , glasses knives and forks it's fine.
You'd probably be able to find all you need in a charity shop for a few pounds.

Ok, so if they're really not listening, I would get grumpy, because it's not rocket science. And I wouldn't worry about being rude, because doing a half-arsed job is lazy and inconsiderate and rude. I would pick up the dirty plate/bowl, show it to them and say, "Can you see these bits? What is the problem, exactly? You can see it's not clean, so why are you leaving it in that state for me?" Put her on the spot.

You’ve been polite and it has made no difference, so at this point no I don’t think it’s rude!

I would just tell them you want to have separate kitchen stuff from now on. I don't think that's rude at all if you've spoken to them about leaving things dirty and they've continued to do it.

This is it to me it’s massively inconsiderate because it’s bloody disgusting having to search what you eat with first to see if it’s actually clean! I don’t want to seem like Im monitoring her but I’m going to have to I guess tell her to just use & put away her own set because it’s a deal breaker for me now :/

Keep your utensils etc. in your room and tell them to buy their own. Anything they don't wash up, put into a plastic bin bag and dump outside the back door.

Their putting what they wash half washed in the drainer to dry as if it’s now cleaned :(
Dont wanna look petty lifting all the utensils out but that’s an idea maybe yeah thanks

My (now) DH had his own kitchen stuff when living in a house share with people who didn't wash up. He just kept it in a big plastic tub and kept it in his room. I don't think the room mates ever noticed tbh as they all hung out together and I never detected an atmosphere. I remember thinking at the time, maybe he was being rude in some way, but in hindsight it's much more shitty behaviour to not just clean up after yourself.

I feel your pain

I cook professionally so for me total kitchen hygiene is a must , and it is in work where its just me

At home we have a dishwasher yet still mother leaves cutlery on the side of the sine and I dont think either her or DH have every rinsed a sink

What I do, when I find stuff not washed is leave it out beside the sink to be washed up again , or for someone to notice and load the dishwasher again

Its ruddy annoying , really annoying, especially as we are three adults and I feel Im the only one that knows how to wash up

I also accept my standards are the same as someone else's . Even at work, where as I leave everything shining, I can go in and find the sink trap fill of gunk, and greasy dishes supposedly washed

It’s just a disgusting feeling having to check there isn’t food bits on the things before I use them to eat it’s driving me nuts iv never seen anyone rush so much when cleaning stuff in a sink & shes home all day everyday!

Just a thought but could this be an eyesight issue rather than a lack of consideration? If someone can't see the bits still left, they can't always make sure to wash them all away. My grandma got to this point and we'd just subtly re-wash things before use.

Like I say, I feel your pain and for me it doubles if someone does do the dishes that dont go in the dishwasher - and I have to clean them before I use them

But I also have to tell myself , their standards arent mine And both of those I have in the house cant see diddly squat anyway - dh refuses to wear glasses, mum has cataracts

I accept that no one is going to clean the kitchen as I can, but I also appreciate when DH does his best . Its not perfect, but it passable ( I just go behind him but because he did his best, its not hard work )

I dont know what else is going on that's made this huge for you, obviously there is something. Only you know what you can let go off . I get that I might have to re wash but at least he got the kitchen floor clean

Unsure she doesn’t wear Glasses & is around 52 x

Ummmm huge for me?

nothing else needs to be going on it is huge !!

your telling me sharing a house with someone who’s leaving cutlery & Utensils to dry in a dish rack with visible pieces of food on them is not something to be annoyed at?

okay yeah no big deal just pick off the dried in bits of food on our shared cutlery before I use it everytime yeah?

lmao

Would it be an option to renegotiate the chores, and you do all the washing up while she does something else like the vacuuming?

That would be a great idea but we don’t have any chores rules so I don’t know how to start now - unless I tell her not to do any washing up at all but take over something else but to be fair she only has to deal with her room as I rent that to her x