Passed for a promotion (again)

[Seriouslyunimpressed]

feeling low and deep desire to be seen.
i am in a male dominated industry and job, very measurable and i am a top performer. Yet every time a leadership position has come up over the last 5 years, I was passed, at times the application process was not even open. Competence is not an issue, followership neither, I just cannot break the code of building the right informal relationship and negotiate behind closed doors. There is always one of their mates. Often quite mediocre ones. I don’t think it’s going to happen anymore at this point. Which I kind of knew already. Just wanted a safe space to feel low as I am pretty sure it happen quite a lot to women in positions where there is real money in play (or not)

Is there anyone on the leadership that you can confide in? And ask how to get on? If there’s no way to get promoted, then resign and theyll Probably promote you then! Then the ball Is in your court to stay or go.

sounds like it is time to move. Even in a male dominated industry there will be companies that value competence and actually seek out diversification as a proven way of strengthening company performance.

Do you believe you’ve missed out purely because you’re a woman? If yes I’d be taking legal action.

If that’s not what you want, rant away. It’s unfortunately common, even in non high paying roles. My manager has made several comments about my ability to do my job due to the fact I’m the only woman out of 2500 who has actually wanted to do it, everyone else avoids it like the plague, it’s infuriating to be assumed that I’ll struggle because I’m a woman. I’ve even had other managers tell me I do a better job than the guys.

Have you actually made it known that you want a promotion? I instigate the conversation with my line manager, when I reach a point where I’m approaching wanting to move up, I ask for a meeting to discuss my development, I tell them what role I want, why I think I’m ready for it, the timeline I want to work towards, where I think I need support and ask them if they agree.

I mean, you would imagine that the job applications and interviews provide something of a hint.

Do tell me those have happened OP? Otherwise there is a clear point made here.

I can't comment on the fairness of the process, but unfortunately being top performer in your current role is not necessarily enough, some senior roles need different skillsets, being able to network and promote yourself is important.

If you think it's unfair and unlikely to change I would be looking for a new job.

Someone in the highest levels of a very large multinational company said this to me ‘You know why men are paid more than women today - because they ask for the pay rise’. Unfortunately that is a generalising stereotype but often true.

Do they know you want a promotion?
Have you asked for feedback each time you have been denied?
Have you spoken to management abiut this and about feedback?
Have you taken steps to fill fill any gaps?

You make a lot of presumptions but you don’t seem to be proactive in getting the promotions. It isn’t just going to come to you through hard work or being ‘mates’ with the boss.

Promotions need ownership from the person applying or wanting them: have you done this?

Are you a top performer in your current job, but perhaps falling short on soft skills required more at the rung up? This is really common. Remember that the promotion you want is a different job.

Leaders often have top skills in

• communication
• influencing
• strategy
• politics

Delivering through a team is different to being a standalone top performer, for example.

Different situation but a colleague once remarked to me when I was a postgrad that opportunities just seemed to fall into my hands. No they didnt. I wemt out and hustled for them. I was VERY political from the onset. Got myself co-opted onto committees, volunteered for things, pushed myself into places where I would not normally be invited and forged links with individuals and groups who held the power. I hate pubs (you were allowed to smoke back then), However I joined the group from time to time to build connections. Its not enough to be a brilliant academic - or anything else. You have to be a bit of a performer as well.

Arseholes

Yeah sometimes the seniors are very political animals, they basically have the ability to manipulate people and not really care about the team, only the bottom line.
It's like the working hard Vs working smart argument. If you want to be promoted you need to play the game, tick the right boxes, smooze the right people and show you have good leadership skills. This can be a very very different skill set to doing well at your current role, especially so if you're in more technical role.
If you want the leadership positions, you need to be proactive, apply for the roles and seek feedback on how you can get there. Or if you still feel it's pure sexism holding you back you need to look elsewhere!

Thank you, very kind messages. My job requires loads of communication and soft skills including influence but there is definitely truth in what many have said. Happy for those women who managed to engage and win at the political side of the role. In full honesty, I have tried over the time to move to organisations that were deliberately less political and more diverse and whilst it feels a it safer (my sector can be very aggressive, think about substance abuse fuelled rage and bullying on a daily in some companies), progression has been tricky

I work in a male-dominated field. I've been in my current job a year, and was promoted after 10 months. That's more progress than I ever made in a previous role, where there was always some reason why I just wasn't good enough, which had more to do with me bot having a dick and others feeling threatened by competence than my ability (or lack of.)

Move company.

@Seriouslyunimpressed have you actually applied for progression or asked for progression or are you waiting for it to happen organically?

Im in senior leadership and I’m not promoting anyone who hasn’t asked or expressed interest in promotion. I don’t just go to people and say ‘hey I’m going to give you more responsibility, a higher title and more money’. One of my team the other week asked why they hadn’t been promoted in the last round and I told her that she had never expressed any interest in wanting a promotion, she did her job well but hadn’t asked for any extra responsibility, hadn’t taken the initiative to step up in any way or shown any interest in other roles. I’m not a mind reader and I need to have a reasonable expectation that if I take a risk on a person it will pay off. As far as I was concerned she was content where she was and doing good, if she wants progression then I am more than happy to support that, I’ll assist her in getting mentoring, training, providing access to work that will allow her to gain experience but she needs to lead that push I’m not going to drag her through it.

We have a process where we document aspirations and development plan aligned to it. I know I discussed it and actioned it with my direct manager. I was also included in the leadership preparation program and was asked to mentor 5 people in 5 different countries. So yes I have probably spent more time overachieving the companies targets and work within the process this time around.