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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that you should always use your headlights when driving in the dark?

113 replies

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:06

Now that it's getting darker much earlier in the afternoons, I've started seeing quite a sizeable minority of people each day driving either only with sidelights or with no lights at all when it's already properly fully dark - dark enough so that (thankfully) virtually every other driver does have their lights on. I don't know if it's just in my area or if people are doing it everywhere?

Am I missing something important here, or do they just have a death wish? How difficult is it to turn a knob and put your lights on? Do some people genuinely believe that headlights are strictly only for night time - and if it's 3:30pm, you don't turn your lights on because it's still only the afternoon, even though it's far too dark to see properly or be safely seen without them?

AIBU to think that it should be 3 or even 6 points on your licence for dangerous driving, unless your lights have just that moment failed on you and now don't actually work? Just why?

OP posts:
Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:32

LighthouseLED · 05/12/2025 21:29

It was dark enough to need headlights at 3.30pm on the south coast today

Indeed it was.

Twice over my 27 years driving I've forgotten to put my lights on, both times driving off a garage forecourt. It happens.

TheNightingalesStarling · 05/12/2025 21:32

Can't you switch off the automatic lights though? We've been able to in all our cars. (Which is handy, as you can't have headlights on at security checkpoints!)

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:33

TidyCyan · 05/12/2025 21:19

Many cars have automatic lights, and permanent mandatory Daytime Running Lights. Other drivers can see you in the dark in any vehicle newer than 2011 due to DLRs so people only put the headlamps on when they need to see themselves.

We're in a very average area affluence-wise - a real mix of new cars, oldish ones and very old ones (we have one that's nearly 25 years old - but it does have headlights that we use whenever necessary).

I presume the cars I've been seeing with no lights on whatsoever must be older than 2011.

OP posts:
TidyCyan · 05/12/2025 21:33

TheNightingalesStarling · 05/12/2025 21:32

Can't you switch off the automatic lights though? We've been able to in all our cars. (Which is handy, as you can't have headlights on at security checkpoints!)

Yes you can! They've done it during every MOT I've had I think so it's always worth checking when you pick up.

TidyCyan · 05/12/2025 21:35

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:33

We're in a very average area affluence-wise - a real mix of new cars, oldish ones and very old ones (we have one that's nearly 25 years old - but it does have headlights that we use whenever necessary).

I presume the cars I've been seeing with no lights on whatsoever must be older than 2011.

Quite possibly. There are a lot of Minis on the road from 2007-2011 (I own one) and I know my 2007 Peugeot 207 is still on the road somewhere.

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:36

TidyCyan · 05/12/2025 21:26

This posters means if you switch to driving a non-automatic-lights car you might forget to put them on.

Ah, OK - thanks.

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 05/12/2025 21:40

I see so many cars with no rear lights on , but the headlights are .
My car puts its headlights on automatically but I have to manually switch on the others.
And so many cars are black/grey/silver so invisible .

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 05/12/2025 21:43

TidyCyan · 05/12/2025 21:19

Many cars have automatic lights, and permanent mandatory Daytime Running Lights. Other drivers can see you in the dark in any vehicle newer than 2011 due to DLRs so people only put the headlamps on when they need to see themselves.

DRLs are better than nothing but are no substitute for a pair of 60W halogens or equivalent in many circumstances.

Jc2001 · 05/12/2025 21:43

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:25

But isn't the point of automatic lights that it doesn't matter if you forget - because the car will already have turned them on itself?!

Most automatic car safety features tend to err on the side of caution, sometimes to the point of annoyance - if anything, you'd expect them to come on when it's still quite light; not wait until it's really, really dark.

You can switch off the auto headlights feature. In fact they seem to do that when they do an MOT to test that the lights are working, they switch to manual and often do put it back to auto. I've been caught out by that before but realised within a couple of seconds because the dashboard is dark. Not sure how anyone would drive like that for long though, even if there is street lighting.

HPFA · 05/12/2025 21:48

I managed to drive off without switching on headlights recently.

The difference inside my new car from having them on and not is nil except for a tiny green light so there's now nothing that clicks my brain like there used to be in my old car. The earlier poster is quite right about the effects of having a fully lit dashboard.

I'm now training myself to check for that green light frequently in the hope that if I drive off again without switching them on I'll notice very quickly.

However I don't think it's at all the equivalent of drinking five cans of beer which is something you do consciously.

CanSeeClearlyNowTheRainHasGone · 05/12/2025 21:50

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:20

And if somebody 'forgot' that they'd had several pints before driving?

How can you forget that you're supposed to be able to see the road ahead of you, or indeed your dashboard?

  1. Daytime running lights put put a certain amount of light. It used to be more obvious to the driver that you had no light.
  2. If you drive a car with auto lights its surprising how quickly it ceases to be part of your activities. I drove 5 or 6 miles in a hire car in Greece like that.
  3. There are fewer dark spaces around now. There's often enough visibility without your lights that it doesnt trigger the "need lights" reaction.
  4. Dashboards are lit without headlights being on. Usually they dim when lights come on. Again another trigger that simply isnt there for many people.
Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:50

Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:32

Indeed it was.

Twice over my 27 years driving I've forgotten to put my lights on, both times driving off a garage forecourt. It happens.

No it wasn’t.

Im in Hampshire. Nowhere near dark at 330pm today.

Like I said, if you’ve got extreme conditions, heavy clouds or rain then perhaps. I had to put the visor down to stop getting blinded by the sun today , but at no point did I need my headlights on to see where I was going; it was still light, so the idea that everyone should be driving around at half 3 in the winter with headlights on is just daft.

Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:52

Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:50

No it wasn’t.

Im in Hampshire. Nowhere near dark at 330pm today.

Like I said, if you’ve got extreme conditions, heavy clouds or rain then perhaps. I had to put the visor down to stop getting blinded by the sun today , but at no point did I need my headlights on to see where I was going; it was still light, so the idea that everyone should be driving around at half 3 in the winter with headlights on is just daft.

It was pissing down in Brighton, but tbh I didn't look at the time.

Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:53

Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:52

It was pissing down in Brighton, but tbh I didn't look at the time.

Extreme conditions

put your lights on

Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:53

Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:53

Extreme conditions

put your lights on

I do!

AnOldCynic · 05/12/2025 21:54

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 05/12/2025 21:20

And if somebody 'forgot' that they'd had several pints before driving?

How can you forget that you're supposed to be able to see the road ahead of you, or indeed your dashboard?

I forget every couple of weeks. Usually someone flashes me. If I can, I’ll acknowledge it and thank them.

I can honestly say I have never forgotten that I’ve had several pints.

Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:56

Isittimeformynapyet · 05/12/2025 21:53

I do!

So do I if the conditions warrant it.

The OP doesn’t mention that.

DeathMetalMum · 05/12/2025 22:01

Perfectly clear here at 3.30 this week.

I however find the opposite, more people will have their lights on at 3.30 or early evening any time of the year in perfect sight, than 11am when it's raining and this is affecting visibility. Today it was torrential rain at 3.30 and huge black clouds so lights definitely needed.

HPFA · 05/12/2025 22:12

AnOldCynic · 05/12/2025 21:54

I forget every couple of weeks. Usually someone flashes me. If I can, I’ll acknowledge it and thank them.

I can honestly say I have never forgotten that I’ve had several pints.

That comparison really annoyed me.

This thread and a quick Google have made me understand how a car can trick your brain into thinking your lights are on when they aren't.

That has nothing at all in common with drink driving.

GasperyJacquesRoberts · 05/12/2025 22:15

HPFA · 05/12/2025 21:48

I managed to drive off without switching on headlights recently.

The difference inside my new car from having them on and not is nil except for a tiny green light so there's now nothing that clicks my brain like there used to be in my old car. The earlier poster is quite right about the effects of having a fully lit dashboard.

I'm now training myself to check for that green light frequently in the hope that if I drive off again without switching them on I'll notice very quickly.

However I don't think it's at all the equivalent of drinking five cans of beer which is something you do consciously.

My car has automatic lights but the little green light that shows they've turned on is perfectly hidden behind the top of the steering wheel when I've got it in the most comfortable position. I find myself hunkering down in my seat to see it, as well as checking how well the car in front of me is lit up, to reassure myself the lights have actually turned on. It's annoying.

mumofoneAloneandwell · 05/12/2025 22:15

Headlights are so so bright these days anyway, they probably didnt even realise

IsItTimeToRetireYet · 05/12/2025 22:21

I was looking for a space in a busy car park this evening and ended up in the darkest corner. As I was turning into an aisle, a black car with no lights on was driving forward into a space. It was not directly in front of me so it was almost impossible to see until the driver hit the brake. Don’t know how they didn’t realise their lights were off!

i also wish drivers would turn on lights in very heavy rain on motorways/dual carriageways if they don’t turn on automatically. Grey cars without lights don’t stand out against a backdrop of grey rain and spray from the road surface!

Muchtoomuchtodo · 06/12/2025 08:56

I don’t understand why so many cars have front DRL but not back.

I’ve seen loads of cars in the motorway in poor driving conditions recently with nothing showing at the back but some lights on the front. It’s bonkers. I assume their drivers think that they’re on the back and front

Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 06/12/2025 09:54

HPFA · 05/12/2025 22:12

That comparison really annoyed me.

This thread and a quick Google have made me understand how a car can trick your brain into thinking your lights are on when they aren't.

That has nothing at all in common with drink driving.

It was probably a bad analogy on my part; but my point was that both are extremely dangerous to have to share a road with: a car being driven by a drunk driver and an invisible car in the dark. Also, both are completely avoidable - unlike with a car that suddenly breaks down in a really inconvenient place.

I still don't see how you could get in a car when it's dark, or be driving in a car when it gets very dark and forget that being able to see and be seen on the public road is a very, very basic part of driving.

Do people sit at home in the dark, groping around all evening and bumping into things, 'forgetting' to turn on the light switch?! Fair enough if they do, as that doesn't affect anybody else; but I still maintain that, if you can't remember/manage to make your car visible to other motorists when it's fully dark, you shouldn't be allowed to use the public roads.

OP posts:
Politicians247UnderwearExtinguishingService · 06/12/2025 10:00

Lonelycrab · 05/12/2025 21:56

So do I if the conditions warrant it.

The OP doesn’t mention that.

Doesn't mention what? Extreme conditions that severely impede visibility but not specifically because of darkness?

I thought that was obviously implied?! If visibility is not good at any time - for any reason and using your headlights will improve your being able to see and be seen by other drivers, always use them! If you're undecided as to whether they will help, err upon the side of using them!

OP posts: