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AIBU?

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Original poster

Do you expect regular updates from nursery on how your child is getting on? To say something or not…

13 replies

Rocketship003 · 05/12/2025 09:08

DD age 2 started nursery in September this year and settled in quite well. She does 8 hours a week, 4 hours 2 mornings a week.

We got regular updates from nursery for the first few weeks, then sporadic, and now nothing no photos or updates for just over a month (about 8/9 sessions)

Nursery have an app where they upload photos of what the children have got up too, but they do not upload every day and DD is not often in the photos.

DM and MIL do pick up for us as we are working and both said it’s quite hard to get an update as of course all the kids are coming out and the staff are busy.

I wasn’t sure if this was that much of a deal considering DD always comes out happy and she’s only there for 4 hours twice a week but talking to a couple of friends they think it’s odd that the nursery don’t update me on what the children have been up to or eaten.

Should I be bothered? Would you be?

OP posts:
MidnightPatrol · 05/12/2025 09:14

Mine give me an update verbally, daily. What they have done that day, what and how much they are, nappies, any issues etc. We have a chat every day.

The app is used more to track developmental progress - inc photos etc, which will include some of their activities.

I’d like more pictures but tbh I appreciate why they don’t given number of children / business of routine etc

PollyBell · 05/12/2025 09:15

If i needed to know something specific yes otherwise no

Newgirls · 05/12/2025 09:17

I think times have changed as a few years ago when mine went we didn’t get any updates or pics until end of the year. At pick up it was busy so just a quick bye and that was it.

I think this is part of parenting - they are in someone else’s care and you trust them to look after them. Once they have settled in. Same with primary school etc you don’t hear every week how they are getting on.

Original poster
Rocketship003 · 05/12/2025 09:17

PollyBell · 05/12/2025 09:15

If i needed to know something specific yes otherwise no

Ok thank you, I might just not say anything then to be honest

OP posts:
Original poster
Rocketship003 · 05/12/2025 09:17

Newgirls · 05/12/2025 09:17

I think times have changed as a few years ago when mine went we didn’t get any updates or pics until end of the year. At pick up it was busy so just a quick bye and that was it.

I think this is part of parenting - they are in someone else’s care and you trust them to look after them. Once they have settled in. Same with primary school etc you don’t hear every week how they are getting on.

Edited

Yes this is so true! Thank you

OP posts:
KittyPup · 05/12/2025 09:20

Every minute spent on the iPad updating for parents is a minute away from the staff engaging with the children. If it takes them 3/4 mins to update per child and they have say 20 in the room, that is 60-80 minutes being taken away from the children. I don’t see them not constantly updating as a bad thing. They do it at the start so you could see she was settling in well. Now she is settled there is no need.

Frogbear · 05/12/2025 09:21

If she’s not there that often she won’t be in many of the photos with other children. We get several photos every couple of months and then at the end of the month they upload around 50 photos of what the class has been doing and in months where DS has had a lot of sickness so missed a lot of nursery, he’s sometimes in none of them.

Photos are nice but really they’re just a snapshot of what they’re doing in that moment. It’s no indication of whether they’re happy, developing, etc etc. It’s more important to get updates on them generally, though again, as your DD is there for just 2 mornings a week, there won’t be many opportunities to take photos.

Bushmillsbabe · 05/12/2025 09:24

I would prefer they weren't updating all the time, as that takes them away from the children. The only update I requested waas where we needed to contact gp if DD went a certain number of days without doing a poo so I asked them to put on app when had done a poo.

officiallybringing · 05/12/2025 09:25

We get a photo every day and brief 1-2 line summary of the activities that day and detailed entries of how much she ate and what she was fed several times a day and each nappy she has.

MinPinSins · 05/12/2025 09:25

Do you know how nursery structures their day? Mine often does free play outside and storytime in the morning, with the big activity in the afternoon. It's the activity that photos tend to be taken of. If your daughter is only in twice a week for short periods, it may well be that she's not there at the times when it would be convenient to take photos.

notcomfortable · 05/12/2025 09:27

My daughter has been in nursery since January and I haven't had a single photo
No count of wet nappies
No count of what was eaten
Just "she's had a good day"

Pavementworrier · 05/12/2025 09:27

No - this is one of the stupidest parts of modern childcare.

"Sat for three hours - looked vaguely interested in toy car - got bored - did TWO poos"

Original poster
Rocketship003 · 05/12/2025 09:33

Pavementworrier · 05/12/2025 09:27

No - this is one of the stupidest parts of modern childcare.

"Sat for three hours - looked vaguely interested in toy car - got bored - did TWO poos"

Haha this made me laugh; so true

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