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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Driving instructor wants money same day

23 replies

Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:30

DD has been learning to drive since March, I pay for block lessons.

the only issue I’m having is the instructor doesn’t tell me I need to pay for another block of lessons until the day they finish then demands the payment is made that day. It’s been fine and iv managed but it’s bloody annoying. Especially if he cancels one week etc I don’t keep track when it’s due.

she failed her test on Monday and has another one booked for Feb. Originally he said he will just give her some lessons before her test but he messaged me this morning saying he’s doing his accounts today so if I want to book 5 hours I will need to pay. By this afternoon.

I can’t afford it today as I wasn’t expecting it.

I feel so stressed now 😩

OP posts:
Crofthead · 05/12/2025 07:31

Why did you agree to pay for blocks of driving lessons if you can’t afford it? Maybe one block as a gift but the agreement was you would indefinitely pay for driving lessons? Is your daughter contributing?

MachineBee · 05/12/2025 07:31

Sounds like the instructor is not very organised. Would your DD consider using another instructor?

Breadandbutta · 05/12/2025 07:33

You could've had a bit of paper stuck to the fridge and ticked off a number each time she'd had a lesson - that way you'd know.

Yabu. You need to budget for big expenses.

Twistedfirestarters · 05/12/2025 07:34

I get why it might have caught you out this time as you were presumably hoping she'd pass. Otherwise though, 'I don't keep track when it's due" is a bit daft. You need to keep track yourself, it's not the instructor's job to do that for you. Mark it on a calendar or something, it's not that onerous a task.

ComfortFoodCafe · 05/12/2025 07:34

You need to keep the track yabu for being unorganised. If your struggling pay for weekly lessons. Not their fault you & your daughter need to track it!

RampantIvy · 05/12/2025 07:35

I'm confused. If you booked a block of 6 lessons wouldn't you know when lesson 6 was coming up and would therefore need to book some more?

Can't you or your daughter keep track?

hididdlyho · 05/12/2025 07:36

I think it's normal to pay in blocks, I think I was asked to pay for 10 hours upfront and take the cash to pay for the next block on the day I used up the previous payment. I would suggest your daughter keeps track of her hours and lets you know when a block is due to come to an end, that way you should get at least a week's notice. If you're being kind enough to pay for lessons, it's a small ask of her.

Luxio · 05/12/2025 07:36

I feel for the poor instructors having to chase you each time, it's not his job to keep on top of how many lessons she's had and when another block is due.

If you can't afford it then surely your daughter should be contributing she can't be expecting you to pay indefinitely until she passes surely?

Original poster
Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:36

It was block of 10 lessons and some weeks he would cancel.
It’s not those that I’m stressed about, I wasn’t expecting to have to pay out 5 hours worth today

OP posts:
Original poster
Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:37

He chases everyone, not just me.

OP posts:
Luxio · 05/12/2025 07:38

Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:37

He chases everyone, not just me.

Surely most people will not need chasing as they will know how many lessons they have had and ask to book more?

Overthebow · 05/12/2025 07:39

Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:36

It was block of 10 lessons and some weeks he would cancel.
It’s not those that I’m stressed about, I wasn’t expecting to have to pay out 5 hours worth today

Well then don’t and she can have more lessons another time? If she’s going to have the lessons and you want them booked in the of course you need to pay now, otherwise just book them in later on.

Muffinmam · 05/12/2025 07:43

Then don’t pay.

If you can’t afford it then don’t pay.

What did you expect to happen?

That it would be for free?? Seriously. You sound like a CF.

pinkstripeycat · 05/12/2025 07:49

I am a driving instructor. I have an automatic diary (called My Drive Time that is available to instructors across the UK) that the pupil can sign in to using an app and see how much they’ve paid, how many hours they’ve used and see a record of their progress. It automatically sends pupils a reminder of each lesson the 48hrs or the day before.

Even in 1989 my instructor had a little card he’d write my lesson times and dates on so I could keep track.

I don’t know why your DD instructor is asking for money as he’s doing his accounts. That’s odd. We do have to submit tax returns quarterly now but why ask for more money when DD hasn’t used the current lot of hours?

An average pupil spends around £2000-2500 on driving lessons if they have extra practice with parents. Cars and insurance are way more expensive. I’d say if you can afford lessons now you won’t be able to afford a car.

I taught my own DC to drive and neither has a car as I can’t afford to buy them. Both are at uni so also can’t buy their own cars. If I wasn’t an instructor I’d never have been able to afford lessons for my DC.

Katemax82 · 05/12/2025 07:51

Personally my son pays his instructor before each lesson it's easier. Genuine question, if your child fails they have to wait 2 months for another test? And they have a couple of refresher lessons in between? Also how many lessons did your daughter have before taking the rest? I have no idea what to expect as I learnt to drive 19 years ago when you would have liked 20 lessons then test

CatFaceCatFace · 05/12/2025 08:07

Doesnt help right now obviously but just put it in your phone calendar a week or so before the payment is due so you have a reminder? I do that with everything, I have a brain like a sieve and nothing would ever get done otherwise

GoodQueenWenceslaus · 05/12/2025 08:10

I don’t know why your DD instructor is asking for money as he’s doing his accounts. That’s odd. We do have to submit tax returns quarterly now but why ask for more money when DD hasn’t used the current lot of hours?

Presumably OP's daughter has used the current batch, since she took her test on Monday.

OP, it seems reasonable for you to explain to him that you were obviously hoping that she wouldn't need any more lessons and you just haven't got the money available. Perhaps you could book in more lessons nearer to the test date?

Dutchhouse14 · 05/12/2025 08:14

Well you need to pay fir the lesson she has on the day she has it.
But you dont need to pay in advance for a block.
Will he accept payment for individual driving lessons as you go??
I would go back and say I can't afford to pay for a block right now,can we pay for individual lessons as she has them?
Re keeping track of how many lessons had when paying g fir a block, both me and DDs driving instructor were a bit crap at that! But I could have swapped to just paying for individual lessons once a block had finished.

SkinnyOatFlatWhiteForMePlease · 05/12/2025 08:15

Blueybingomum · 05/12/2025 07:36

It was block of 10 lessons and some weeks he would cancel.
It’s not those that I’m stressed about, I wasn’t expecting to have to pay out 5 hours worth today

You should have kept track, he has made contact because you are out of prepaid lessons with a lest booked. He can hardly be expected to hold a slot open for you.
I would email to say unable to book today, will book on X date and hope you have availability.

Swiftie1878 · 05/12/2025 08:17

MachineBee · 05/12/2025 07:31

Sounds like the instructor is not very organised. Would your DD consider using another instructor?

You struggle to find one with capacity where I live. They have long waiting lists!

OP needs to keep track herself, and if she can’t afford it, stop!

fruitbrewhaha · 05/12/2025 08:25

Surely you must have realised your prepaid lesson had been used before her test last Monday?

But if you haven’t the money to pay you just let him know. If he is very booked up you may loose her slot but it’s not the end of the world.

RampantIvy · 05/12/2025 09:08

CatFaceCatFace · 05/12/2025 08:07

Doesnt help right now obviously but just put it in your phone calendar a week or so before the payment is due so you have a reminder? I do that with everything, I have a brain like a sieve and nothing would ever get done otherwise

That's what I do for appointments, meter reading, bill payments and all sorts of other things.

SarahAndQuack · 05/12/2025 10:02

Actually, I do think it's a little odd to say 'payment immediately' for something like that. I think it'd be more normal to ask for payment 48 hours in advance. But I agree with the poster who suggested your DD ought to keep track of it and tell you when there's a payment coming due.

It would slightly irritate me he's not organised enough to ask for payment in advance, actually. In my book committments like lessons are regular enough that it ought to be possible for the person charging to send out their invoice in enough time for the other person to pay. If he's really demanding money upfront of the day, that's different - but it sounds as if he's wanting both the convenience of having a block of lessons paid, and the convenience of same-day billing.

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