To feel fed up by…

[PeonyPatch]

Just life at the moment. I feel I am bombarded by perfect looking influencers whenever I turn on the TV or when I go on social media. Everyone looks pristine with their flawless make up and outfits. Instagram is the worst with super expensive fashion and beauty hauls… Even TV, everyone (mostly females) look perfect. It’s hard not to compare yourself but I’m just a very ordinary 35 year old. I work from home so most of the time I am in leggings, jeans or sweats and just pretty casual.

I find how I am feeling particularly worse this time of the year with a pressure to consume and spend money and look “festive glam.” If I’m totally honest, I’m just super burnt out by it all. It’s exhausting. I’ll never have as much money as these rich influencers who look perfect.

Does anyone else feel the same?
How do you all cope with it all?

I am craving authenticity and people who poke fun at the mundanity of ordinary life.

Nobody's perfect. What you see on Instagram will be heavily edited and filtered. Look at the people around you in real life, the vast majority of people are average looking.

This is why I don't have Instagram. It was supposed to be for sharing pictures with family and friends, but it was taken over by influencers and people with not an ounce of integrity in them.

Step away from it.

Seriously?

I've got no time or care for twatty influencers who all look like blow up dolls anyway. I'm 39 and I stopped giving a shit about what anyone thinks of how I look/dress a long time ago. Honestly there's far more to life than clothes and make up. Be comfortable with who you are and give zero fucks for anyone who would put you down 😁 hopefully that's what you were after😂

I don't see any influencers on IG unless Good Boy Ollie counts!?

Stop following grifters on social media

Stop looking at instagram?

YABU to compare yourself to these people, they are not worth your time. Just enjoy your little life and have fun, no time for comparisons.

Stop looking? At 35 you would know its just highlight reels. Fake lives to encourage you to fewl shit and buy whatever shit they are selling. Delete it

Go and hang out in tesco and look at normal people, I'm sure you compare well.

I don't feel the need to spend, stuff stresses me out. But everyone has a budget, stick to yours and prioritise whatever makes you happiest.

I cope by taking no notice of it all and getting on with my own life.

Just enjoy yourself OP. Do things you enjoy. Stop buying into all the myths and commericalisation. It's all crap.

I don’t know if it’s a generational thing though because I don’t personally feel able to get rid of instagram because it is actually a way I connect with friends and family.

I know I’m old enough to know that it’s all fake, heavily filtered etc… I just started this thread as a discussion point to see if others felt the same. I do genuinely have a problem with comparisons so telling me to stop, won’t work. I need to unhook myself a bit somehow. It’s weird, can’t explain it. Have got better at accepting myself in recent years.

Yeah, this is good advice. Thanks!

I don't understand this whole " influencer" thing.
I might be influenced by someone I respect. But I'm quite selective about who I respect.

Why is anyone interested in or bothered by these self obsessed people who spend their lives preening themselves.

You are a real person OP. Not some blow up doll with an unbearable ego.

I couldn't care less what influencers say or do. I managed to grow up in the 70s making up my own mind about things without needing to be influenced by anyone.

My house will be decorated how I like and I'll wear my everyday clothes on Christmas day.

Think about what you would do if there is no social media and do that, you’ll find life more real. Chat to your friends and family on the phone or arrange meet ups.

I mean IG is flooded with influencers if you look.

However I also prefer to be influenced by Good Boy Ollie and Tato 🤣

Tato is an absolute legend.

Don’t follow them on social media. Change your algorithms and click not interested if reels or posts come up. Watch or look at other posts of things that interest you, animals, travel, fitness, whatever and the more of that wil eventually come up. I don’t follow influencers and if one pops up they get dismissed quickly.

Or delete it.

ETA instagram doesn’t have to be full of that kind of content you can choose what you see it just takes some time. I like to use it for photo memories, friends and family and then accounts that are funny, health/fitness related, travel, menopause, dogs and cute animals come up on my reels but you get the idea. I’m 46 no one is influencing me the fake shit but they might influence me to travel somewhere ( not the fake shit travel influencers)

OP, it's on you to live the life you want. Feel a bit shit in leggings and joggers? Don't wear them. Switch it up.

Or, just chill.

But, look to yourself. Don't blame others.

It’s not a generational thing because I’m the same age as you and I don’t feel like this at all. I’m happy with my scruffy alternative self and honestly couldn’t care less what influencers (or anyone else) looks like or chooses to do/not to do with their appearance. I don’t feel any kind of pressure to be “festive glam”, I don’t like Christmas anyway so I just ignore its existence every year. And I absolutely would delete instagram if I didn’t need it for work (part of my professional skills are related to social media). The only thing I ever look at on there apart from clients’ accounts are animal memes so that’s all the algorithm ever sends me.

I am craving authenticity and people who poke fun at the mundanity of ordinary life.

So find those people and do that rather than compare yourself to infliencers.

I don't feel the pressure to do 'festive glam' and I never have. I have no idea about 'perfect' people on SM because my algorithm doesn't show me that sort of thing.

It's not compulsory.

I do genuinely have a problem with comparisons so telling me to stop, won’t work.

You can choose not to look at it the first place though.

People on social media are fake. Walk down the high street and nobody is looking polished.

100% get rid of social media for a week. See if you can do it for a week. TV as well if you can manage.
You'll be going crazy for the first day or two, but get some good books or some puzzles or some board games or video games or a home repair project or something, something that'll take your time, including the scrolling time you might spend before bed, no social media. You'll feel so much better for it.

I found myself endlessly on it simply out of habit, I was getting absolutely no pleasure out of it, So I unplugged my TV and got rid of Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, Pinterest, and I only go on YouTube if I need to look up how to do something. (Being on mumsnet is my one concession to this rule and it's only because I sprained my ankle and knee last week and I'm still stuck in bed for a while)

Seriously. Do yourself a favor and try to disconnect from these unreal sources of influencers because you're never going to be able to compare to them because it's their job to look good and, you're going to feel bad.