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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Teacher emailing on first morning Dd ill

68 replies

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 16:39

Is this normal practice?

Dd was off school ill yesterday for the first time since September in a new class with a new teacher.
I had an email from the teacher yesterday lunchtime saying that dd wasn’t in school and asking if everything is ok.
She’s 6

Dh says it’s nice she was asking, never had this before, we would just come back whenever better and I’d give Dd a note to pass to the teacher or just do nothing-are we supposed to?

OP posts:
Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 17:43

Manxexile · 02/12/2025 17:38

Here's a novel suggestion: why don't you contact the school and ask them what you are meant to do?

Nobody in the UK knows what your DD's school's procedures are. but you should know

Ok.

OP posts:
Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 17:44

Thanks everyone

OP posts:
nixon1976 · 02/12/2025 17:44

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 16:49

We’ve only been absent a few times for at most two days, no one contacted us, I assume they would if it was longer

You've been off several times before for two days and not informed the school, and nor have they called you? It's standard where we are (not in UK) to call the school first thing on the first and every subsequent day they are off.

Nanny0gg · 02/12/2025 17:46

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 16:51

Am I supposed to call in each day or just the first day?

Check the school policy

BillieWiper · 02/12/2025 17:47

I've never heard of someone just not sending the child in sometimes with no explanation? And no follow up from the school?

You tell them in advance the child won't be coming in and why. That's just common courtesy? Though the fact they never chased it up is even odder.

HighLadyofTheNightCourt · 02/12/2025 17:47

Since when was using email to contact parents/teachers odd?
Our school communicates with us via email only unless it’s urgent.
Email is still a standard way of communicating surely?

If we’ve not reported our child as absent by 9am we get a phone call. It’s a pretty basic safeguarding procedure.

Horses7 · 02/12/2025 17:47

Sounds like a good teacher who is on the ball. Next time ring in early to let school know.

OneBadKitty · 02/12/2025 17:50

I know you are not in Uk, but in my Uk Primary parents must contact school by 9am if their child is absent. If they don't school attempts to contact parents for an explanation as soon as the register is closed. If they can't make contact and gain a suitable explanation then a home visit is made immediately that morning to check the child's welfare. It's part of our safegaurding procedures.

So safegaurding is likely why the teacher contacted you.

MrsToothyBitch · 02/12/2025 17:51

As you didn't let the school know, the teacher was doing her due diligence.
If you'd already let the office know, it's a nice thought but unnecessary and I'd only reply to ask whether or not the office had passed on the sickness absence info.

It's probably nicely meant but I'd find it intrusive!

Maxorias · 02/12/2025 18:03

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 16:54

The previous teacher was on the class Whatsapp and we could message them on it. This teacher isn’t on this class WhatsApp, which is fine. I do check my emails once-twice a day luckily, but would prefer if she was on the WhatsApp
I think that’s why it felt a bit more formal than previously

I've never had a teacher on social media (also not in the UK).

All communication is by email. I get a notification on my phone same as whatsapp or similar so I don't see what the problem is.

Regarding absences, I've found it depends very much on the school. My son's first school didn't seem to care and so I never bothered informing them. I did inform that we'd be out a month during term to go to our home country and got a scathing email telling me I was jeopardizing my son's future. Considering he was 3 years old at the time I think his education will recover - in fact it was highly beneficial as he was just on the crux of developping this language and I was concerned about him favoring the other language. Given the school was bilingual, it's a bit funny they didn't seem to care about that - then again their level of teaching said language was abismal, so...

Sons current school do seem to care so I email them out of courtesy. I think it's a good thing they check. I'd want to know if my son wasn't in school and I wasn't the one who allowed it !

mindutopia · 02/12/2025 18:10

You have to contact them if she doesn’t go to school. I’m amazed it was the teacher who had time to email you, but yes, it’s normal.

I’ve had the attendance officer ring me within 20 minutes of school starting when they didn’t see dd in class. She was sick, I had contracted them 2 hours earlier but no one checked the email in time, so she was marked as not showing up and they were on the phone to me straight away.

Our secondary school has a ‘you haven’t turned up to school’ van that goes around to students’ houses with 2 teachers to check on the ones who don’t turn up every morning. I often threaten dd with getting caught by the naughty van. 😂

Changingnameagain · 02/12/2025 18:16

This will be because the teacher has been told they have to do this. At a previous secondary school I worked in the form tutors were expected to call home for any absent tutee on first day of absence regardless of whether parent had contacted school absence line or not. It was hugely time consuming and significantly added to staff workload. We had a full time attendance officer. It was 'to show we cared'. In my experience parents were either arsey or bemused by the calls if they had already contacted in.

KittyMcKitty · 02/12/2025 18:27

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 17:01

I mean separately-just to me. With the previous teacher, we occasionally communicated that way, I was careful not to bombard her though as not sure how keen i’d be if I was a teacher and parents were WhatsApping me. It was useful though

A teacher using their personal phone to WhatsApp parents whilst in the classroom would be a safeguarding concern.

Phoning or sending an email or a text via a parent portal is surely just standard safeguarding practice. If a child has not arrived at school then it needs to be followed up on a daily basis. Not hearing from a parent and not being able to contact them would be a massive concern.

really confused by people saying that sending an email is strange.

Perfect28 · 02/12/2025 18:33

You don't think that's a good thing? Imagine if you thought she was going to school and she didn't arrive in the classroom, you would want to know.

Blushingm · 02/12/2025 18:39

You need to contact school the same morning they’re not in

UnintentionalArcher · 02/12/2025 18:55

Thisyearstreeisthebest · 02/12/2025 17:01

I mean separately-just to me. With the previous teacher, we occasionally communicated that way, I was careful not to bombard her though as not sure how keen i’d be if I was a teacher and parents were WhatsApping me. It was useful though

Are you talking about a professional WhatsApp chat - i.e. one on her work phone that she uses during school hours? As you say email is hardly used anymore, systems are obviously quite different in the country you are in.

WonderfulSmith · 02/12/2025 19:12

UnintentionalArcher · 02/12/2025 18:55

Are you talking about a professional WhatsApp chat - i.e. one on her work phone that she uses during school hours? As you say email is hardly used anymore, systems are obviously quite different in the country you are in.

What device are they sending this WhatsApp message on?

Do you think that teachers get work phones? We don’t have pencils!
My laptop is a cut and shut job made by our IT chap from two broken laptops as there isn’t money for a new one.

Cakeandcardio · 02/12/2025 20:22

In my school if you don't phone then you would be contacted by text message before 10am

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