To wonder what you do on weekends with a two year old?

[MyCheeryMouse]

Me and my husband work full time and have weekends off together with 2 year old DC. We both struggle a bit with motivation at the weekends. We have toddler classes on Saturday and Sunday mornings but have no idea what to do with our two year old in the afternoons. I feel like a bit of a failure if we stay home, i try to do activities like painting, playdough etc but often find we quite quickly turn the tv on for DC. Most toddler activities seem to be in the mornings only.

Our DC is not the easiest, sitting in a coffee shop / going out for a meal is not enjoyable. We don’t have loads of friends / many friends with kids so we can’t fill the time meeting up with people. AIBU to wonder what people do with kids at this age on weekends? We’re not looking to do anything big like going into town for museums etc as we’re quite tired from the morning classes.

Just feel a bit “meh” about life I guess. Want to do exciting things for DC and make wonderful memories but i feel so much guilt at weekends that we can spend from 11am at home. We did go out to parks in the summer but feels a bit too cold for that now.

Any suggestions welcome? I appreciate I’m probably coming across quite moany. I feel a little bit low in general so please go easy on me. Really looking for some helpful suggestions and to understand what others do with kids this age.

i feel this. I really struggle with motivation on the weekends and often (especially in winter) we’d end up in front of the screen. What we do is just bundle up and get out the house. Go to a local forest park and go for a walk, search for “fairy houses” etc. sometimes getting out is the last thing I want to do but it always makes her have a better day. Other thing at this age which is a game changer is soft play. My DD would go ape in a soft play and I could sit and watch.

Today we got up at 8:30, played with magna tiles, had breakfast and set off at 10am,.dove about 15 minutes away to a local garden centre, parked up and walked with the pram for maybe 40 minutes through a nature reserve and down a river to a play park, played there for ages (toilets and a cafe there so meant we could stay a while)
Then the short way to walk back, little look at the Xmas decorations in the garden centre and home for 1:30 and lunch,

Set off at 2:45 to meet friends and their child at the local farm 10 minutes away and then a stop for a quick drink in the pub after
Then home for 5, dinner and half a Disney film, bath and bed

But generally we try to play on our bed first thing (magna tiles/jigsaws/stickers) go out for 4 hours or so at least in the morning then get home, make and have lunch together then do something at the table whilst we're already sat there, stickers, baking, playdoh, colouring, then around 4 we end up watching a film together
In terms of going out - if nice weather then play parks, farms, national trust places. If raining garden centres, soft play, museums, even Morrisons!
They're old enough for trampolining places and some older play barn type places now

My sister has a 2 year old we try and get her out in the fresh air come rain moon or shine to knacker her out. I had her over night a couple of weeks ago and I stood at the top of a hill and made her race a ball down. She slept soundly. Anything with animals? Rugby tots, footballers, trips to the seaside, I hate soft play but I think it’s because my own kids are 19.15 and 14 so have PTSD from that era!

Maybe try and do little things, ours was being silly the other day as we hadn't gone out and tried to entertain her at home so at 5pm we dressed her in all her layers and hat etc, got a couple of torches and just went for a walk down the street near us and she loved using the torches
Not going to lie we did end up carrying her most of the time but it still ends up tiring her out

Let go of the “ making memories “ guff. Your child will thrive spending time with you both regardless of what you do as long as you engage with him. Building dens, singing songs, treasure hunt, stickers, painting, splashing in the sink … all these things are a delight to them if you are talking to them throughout. They are learning all the time. Just make sure your DH does his fair share too. Don’t get despondent if they want to move between games quickly. They have no concept of time. Yes it can get a bit tedious for you but this stage goes by in a flash

Aquariums are also good, and this time of year just going for a stroll round the nearest town to see the Xmas lights, you could go on a bus or train too to make it more exciting
Sorry for the billion messages!

Today we: played with play dough, went to the shops and they helped with the scanner while sat in the trolley, came home and stuck stickers and feathers on some card, did some drawing, played with cars, set up a den in their room and played under there, had a mini bath with toys, went to the park and played with a ball, played with toy food.
I find it easiest to compartmentalise each type of toy so they all become a separate activity. Helps you realise how many little things you've done with them really.
When taking them out we go to parks, garden centres, a big Christmas shop near us atm.

3.5 and 22m old so been doing these for a while now 😅
We do a "big" morning activity then are at home so similar to you really.

We have membership to a zoo with lots of different activities, we also do soft play, parks we drive to nearby ones to keep it fresh! (puddlesuits)

This is normally 9-1 as we often take packed lunches.

Some weekends we dont do much of anything...Today dh took 2 yr old to church while i put up xmas decs with oldest. We met at supermarket aroou dc10 and picked up bits...then farted about at home and did stickers / drawing and wrote to santa.

Nap is 1-3 ( or 4!) For youngest. We jave "chill out time" for oldest. This is generally cbeebies on sofa amd some playing magnatiles or we "build a city" or do role play doctors / police etc. Often baking. .today we did cookies.
4 is snack
Playdoh / find the coloured tape / stickers / colouring in and / or kids help make dinner.
5.15 is dinner
5.30 bath. We use food dye to make it weird colours they love it...
Bedtime

We are quite silly with the kids amd have a lot of fun.

I feel (not in an arseholey way) i am a good and present mum (despite my 50hr a week job) and my weekends dont sound madly different to yours so I am wondering if either
A. Instamum pressure is making you feel bad
B. You just dont enjoy time with your child (for whatever validi reason)

I'm lucky that there is a nice play cafe near me. We have a yearly membership so tend to go most Saturdays.
Other things we do is go swimming (he's obsessed with taking a toy boat and splashing about!)
Something once he is a bit older is we sometimes go to toddler time cinema near us. I pay for his ticket and I'm free. It's normally a 30-45 min thing on and we will then go for a walk around nearby and something to eat if he is in the mood to sit!
But honestly, some days we just sit and play at home. I was obsessed at one point at filling all of our time together doing things and forgot how nice it is to just sit at home and enjoy each other's company playing cars, trains or play kitchen (it made me realise he loves to bake so now we make something simple every week together)

Walks, trips to the park, and free play together where the child leads the play and you go along with it.

I absolutely love playing with my 3 year old like this.

I think you can still get these...

We always tried to go swimming, walks in the woods, park, tried to get out as much as possible.

We do quite a few local museums or farms/ zoos; all of which have cheap annual passes. National Trusts are nice for wander but appreciate membership can be expensive. I like to seek out cafes which a few toys/ play areas so I can have a cuppa while they play. Mine also both love their wooden train set/ duplo to play at home.

What’s wrong with a simple trip to the park?

Kids want & need downtime at home just to be, explore & play

Many Kids do not like restaurants/ cafes as a general rule. We always took DC occasionally so she has learnt how to behave in such places, but at 7 she would still never choose to go to a cafe!

Things we did at 2 (although a lot of 2 was during Covid -lockdown):

Play at home - “crafts” messy play, mega blocks, magna tiles, stacking toys, letting them play with safe kitchen/household objects, lots of garden play in all weather , reading , long play baths with lots of toys

Lots of walks in the woods, puddle jumping , wrapped up warm wellies & water proofs

Longer walks with DC in rucksack carrier thing

Bike rides (off road) with DC on MacRide seat

Lots of National Trust places

Playgrounds suitable for younger kids

Bit of softplay if weather really really awful

Swimming. Lots of swimming pool visits!

Also have you tried taking them to a cafe/pub with just one of you. Mine behaves much better in those sorts of places 1on 1. You are giving them all the attention and get to have a nice drink or something. I really enjoy taking mine out by myself to that just for an hour. Take sticker books, where's Wally style books, drawing pads and have a nice drink and interact with them. Then they might enjoy watching the other customers so you can relax and have a nice drink whilst they're distracted

Survive?

At that age we used to go to the library weekly to choose and read books. Lots will also have a story or singing thing on for little ones at the weekend too. I'd work on getting them used to a cafe too as that's a very civilised way to spend a weekend.

Park, swimming, jumping in puddles.

Christmas lights will he up soon, then you can head out for a walk as soon as it gets dark to admire them.

Go and do some jobs in the garden and let them grub about out there.

Get the bus or train somewhere for the experience.

Today we went out with friends to a play cafe and then went for lunch. We see friends with DCs similar ages to our most weekends and go out for food, soft play, days out, swimming, over to friends houses, play parks, garden centers with play areas, woodland walks to go puddle splashing and in the summer country parks or theme parks aimed at young kids and picnics. We don’t do toddler or child classes at the weekends as we want the to be free to be able to go on day trips and weekends away, or see friends and family, so all activities are after school or for my toddler on my day off work.

Playground, walking or hiking, baking/cooking, lego building, arts and crafts, swimming, the library, matinées at the cinema kids club, messages we need to do, movie afternoon, reading, hide and seek, painting outside with water or chalk, going to garden centres or pet shops to see the animals. Tbh ds is in nursery for fairly long days 5 days a week so by the time we get to the weekend he is quite tired and happy to spend time playing independently with his toys or we will play with them together racing his cars etc. We go out for breakfast a morning every few weekends or we'll take a run to the beach or museums or meet friends and their kids. I'm a lone parent and I like to have a plan for what my weekend will be to avoid decision fatigue so by Wednesday or Thurs I know what we'll be doing and I'll give ds a chunk of time one day to be more relaxed and able to play with his toys at home and then another day will be a bit busier and we will get out and about more. If you're struggling with exhaustion and motivation then I'd suggest you each take a morning and take yours out somewhere while the other has a lie in or down time to help with that.

At that age there was nothing my daughter loved more than me sitting on the floor with her and playing with her toys. I don’t think it’s necessary to always be out doing things - young children just want to spend time being the centre of their parents’ attention.

Bus to nearest Museum/Gallery. Sit on top deck and pretend to drive. Play Eye Spy on the way.
At Museum/Gallery, go to shop first and choose 2 post cards. Wander round and find 'your' object/painting.
Play 'Where's the (whatever you can spot) in this room?
Quick biscuit.
Home on the bus.

Show postcards to other parent / sibling and tell them about bus. You tell how brilliant toddler was. Toddler glows with pride.
Tea
Bath
Books
Songs
Bed

I think you’re being hard on yourself, you sound like you’re doing more than enough. At this age they are honestly just happy if you spend time with them playing. I’ve not even left the house with my 2 year old today. She’s tired and a bit grumpy with a cold and all we’ve done is play dress up, play with her dolls, had a cuddle and nap together in bed while her little sister napped and watched a film.

DH took our eldest swimming and out this afternoon as he’s 5 and needs to be on the go but at 2 if they are at nursery all week they do still benefit from some down time at the weekend. Even just a walk in the pushchair round a garden centre or local national trust is enough. You’re doing great, don’t let the insta mums make you feel bad!

Literally just take turns going up and down the road with him on a balance bike. He absolutely loves it. Otherwise, he plays with toys while we tidy and do home jobs. Maybe 30 mins to 1 hour of toddler TV if we’re tired.
rest of the day is taken up with nap (1.5 hrs) and meals.
Long bath with toys in the evening.