Would you go to HR about work colleague’s budget comment

[Rayaj]

I brushed this comment off but a colleague I spoke to earlier thinks I should look to report it.

I am a Northerner working down South. My line of work meant our team had a close eye on the budget.

On our team call on Thursday, someone was being very vocal about benefits. I spoke up to say I’m glad that those who need looking after in Society are taken care of. He basically replied ‘typical scouser, always wanting something for nothing’ which I refuted there and then.

I didn’t really think anything more of it until my colleague mentioned it to me today.

Was I right to brush it off and not report?

I'm a scouser and after years in the SE I too tire of these comments. I get them in both work and personal settings and when I do I respond to them immediately and directly, most people don't know what to do with themselves and tend to look pretty uncomfortable pretty quickly.

It's not one for HR though. Dickheads are just something you have to deal with as a grown up.

Your friend is not your friend, She is just trying to stir up drama which will only hurt you. You will be regarded as weak, lacking in resilience,immature, unable to navigate normal work place relations and a troublemaker.

Neither of you should have commented, it isn’t professional. He was obviously far worse. Anti-Scouse rhetoric is a big thing in England for some reason, never particularly understood it. Not sure I’d go to HR but I’d be inclined to have a word with him.

I usually make a joke of it by pretending to pick up a phone and say 'hello hr, I would like to report Northern discrimination' and people laugh, but also kind of get the point

I wouldn't say anything on the basis of a one-off comment, but if it became a regular thing, and if he carried on after you or your/his manager asked him to stop, it would come under the bullying policy at the last place I worked.

Forget it. Not worth startling a problem over. 🤷‍♀️

i’m a ( plastic) scouser by birth and accent and I would have taken that as a ( rather old and boring) joke, surely no one would say that seriously in a work meeting?

You see, I don't see your attitude as any better than a racist's attitude. It seems that most people in the UK still miss the complete list of protected characteristics when they're being sanctimonious.

If you don't see the difference then I guess you don't.

This, it isn’t HR reporting worthy but is annoying as a scouser. I know others are saying they all have stereotypes elsewhere but those stereotypes aren’t generally calling them criminals. I remember when I was only 8 years old and got up on stage at Butlins in skegness and entertainer asked where I was from. As soon as I said Liverpool everyone in the audience booed loudly! At an 8 year old girl! So I do feel scousers get a worse rep than most. I live and am married to someone from Durham now and just roll my eyes everytime someone makes a thief comment (usually my FIL 🙄)-it’s just boring

Was it an abusive comment? I don't think so. I think it is abusive to have to smile and nod at work when I'm told that women are nothing more than a figment of the male imagination. It is grossly offensive. But it isn't the workplaces job to arbitrate these disputes. Sucking it up is the lesser of two evils surely

I always find “what do you mean by that?” to be a powerful little question, and don’t let them swerve the answer. If it gets a bit aggy if they try to ignore, too bad.

It’s annoying but I don’t think it’s great for people to run to HR for things like that.

I wouldn’t report it but I would confront him when you’re calmer. Just something along the lines of “ you probably don’t even remember making this comment - but just to let you know for future reference I don’t appreciate you making jokes about my origins/ heritage/ background “ ( whatever feels comfy). You obviously have the measure of him
, and you can even add that you don’t have an issue getting on well with people with different ( aka racist, sexist, homophonic as well probably!!) viewpoints - but you don’t expect to be attacked under the guise of a joke. I say this as a northerner myself who had to put up with a load of faux “ only joking” “ only teasing” when younger and realised as I got older how easy it was to call out basically idiots and cowards on such stuff. Believe me - calmly tackle and it stops - ignore and it will spiral.

Discrimination has never required someone to be discriminated against because of a protected characteristic. The definition is ‘the process of making prejudicial distinctions between people based on the groups, classes, or other categories to which they belong or are perceived to belong’.

OP being a scouser is a group to which she belongs… but again. Clearly someone who only cares if someone is treated badly if the basis is enshrined in law.

https://www.gov.uk/discrimination-your-rights

@PigeonsandSquirrels Link above to protected characteristics and the Equality Act 2010.

I would definitely report!

I would say something like…

The other day in our meeting, Mike was really nasty about poor people and said some hurty words. Being morally superior I told him off, but then he called me a scouser and said I want something for nothing. Can you sack him?

That should do it nicely.

Dont report it. You will have a target on your back and it will breed hostility. Aside from the just going through the process will be stressful for you as well as the other person. Why invest all that energy into such a thing. Instead just think of retorts ready to use to deal with it there and then.

Your colleague who suggested reporting it is just stirring. If the colleague was so bothered why isnt she reporting it herself? Why get you to report it? I think she is the one to be more cautious of. This sounds like a manipulative tactic

… that’s the legalities, you can discriminate without it being framed by the law. For example, being ginger isn’t a protected characteristic but if you called all gingers scum and refused to hire them that would still be discriminatory.

You don't need to tell on people every time they offend you. You can just let things go.

If it's beyond the Equality Act, there is no legal recourse or risk financially. If persistent, it may be defined as bullying and harassment and a disciplinary sanction may be appropriate but in the early stages it needs nipping in the bud by the line manager.

Try telling them first, like we've ways handled issues, face to face/these days behind screens. No need to run off and report, give them a chance for their 'banter'. It may not be appropriate but jumping straight to investigation is unnecessary.

It's not Virtue signalling, I'd have said similar because I happen to believe it. He made an appalling comment. I wouldn't report it but would show him the contempt he deserves.

You need to report it. Slurs like this are offensive and are against the culture and rules of most if not every workplace. This isn't tattle taling, this is a valid reason to go to HR. Please, please do not let him get away with it.

I'd have wiped the floor with him there and then. If you didn't just tell now, it was unwelcome, unprofessional and it's to not happen again.