Have you ever recovered from feeling extremely sad?

[Istherehopee]

I know things don’t last forever and so hopefully my feelings will change…

but I’m just so sad and I don’t know how to get out of it. I’ve been really sad for a very long time. I don’t think anyone would know as on the surface I’m very cheerful and successful.

however, I have a lot of work and financial stress. I could bear this but what I really lack in my life is love. Love of any sort.
I only have my mum and brother but they have been extremely abusive and so I’ve been completely estranged for five years.

I do have friends that I’ve known for an extremely long time. My best friends from school are still in touch and although we meet up, we don’t share the same values, our lives are very different and it’s a much more superficial friendship. I have one very close friend from university who I love dearly but her partner is hard work and together they’re quite smug and condescending. They correct your grammar and spelling and I find it really difficult now. Over the last several months, I’ve felt her drift away and it is what it is really. I met up with them both tonight at an event and just left feeling really bad about myself.

the only person I have in my life is my ex who I was with for ten years. He does love me in many ways but it’s not a good relationship. He’s my (only) support system and our relationship is platonic now and we are probably quite co dependent.

but I just feel so alone and just so sad. I genuinely don’t know what to do. Please don’t recommend antidepressants.

Why did you meet up with them they sound horrific. Make sure it’s the last time.

There are nice people out there, you’ve just got to find them. Don’t ever be desperate and compromise yourself with people that are no good for you.

Can you join a hobby or a group. Ragdoll cats are amazing for company and you don’t have to take them out for a walk!

Time is a great healer and your sadness will pass 💐

Hugs.
While I don't have the same family situation as you, I can relate to how you're feeling. Sometimes we find ourselves adrift from friendships and intimacy and it's so lonely.

The way I dealt with it was by putting myself out there and making new friends, it took time but I felt better for taking control - I ended up meeting loads of great people through meetup.com many who have become fantastic friends.

Thank you both of you. I think I do need to take control. I do often just drift away when I feel people treat me badly and I think I’m probably too pleasant for a lot of people, they seem to end up walking all over you and take me for a doormat which I’m not. The event tonight was a ticketed social event related which I had to go to and I was dreading seeing them there.

it’s funny because I detest the phrase smug married couple but they really are and I hate feeling that way and feeling bad after i see them.

I just feel so alone and stressed and trapped in my life and I’m trying to be rational about it - it’s a mindset and if I can change my mindset then maybe I can change things?

I just wish I had friends that I loved and felt comfortable with and had a partner and family that I loved and loved me too. But I suppose that’s what anyone wants really.