I think is the difficult part to having sons.
Mine are 8 and almost 12 now.
When they were both in their first 5-6 years of life it was all about me…. total mummy’s boys and I knew the day was always going to come that as they aged theu would gravitate towards their dad more, it when it happens I still found it hard.
My husband and both boys are all sports mad so they have that common interest, and although I make a real effort to get involved with it, it’s not the same as the genuine passion they all have for it. As a result they naturally all spend a lot more time together as a 3 and I do find it hard at times.
But just as my husband understood when they were younger that I was going to be the parent theu gravitated to the most, I accept that now it’s his turn as the primary parent.
Mums and dads play very different roles in their child’s lives, and it’s his time to play the role that boys need, an active and involved, present male role model and I am so glad that they have it.
I’m now the parent that gets them to school, helps them with their homework, sorts out their play dates and parties, gets them to the dentist and hair dressers, keeps an eye out for when their shoes are getting too small etc, makes sure they have everything they need, etc - all the practical stuff, and just generally make sure that their life ticks along nicely. They obviously don’t see me doing all these behind the scenes things, but it’s still a part of parenting that means I play an important role in keeping their life settled and stable.
And even though they are now all about their sports and going down that path with their dad, it’s still me that puts them to bed every night and they wouldn’t have it any other way. There’s a very special nurturing relationship they have with me that they don’t with their dad, I just have a closeness to them that he doesn’t, and I find a lot of comfort in that. When they’re upset, hurt, scared or worried etc, it’s still me they come to. I think there’s a mothering connection between me and them that will never go, no matter how old they get and how much social time they spend with their dad.
Like I said, mothers and fathers have different roles in parenting (be it with daughters or sons), and it’s just a case of accepting that biological fact, respecting the differences you each bring to your child’s life, being thankful that your children are able to experience that rounded experience, and remembering that no matter how much they may gravitate toward their dad (even if it is just on the basis of being the same sex), you will still always be their mum and nothing will ever take away from that special relationship.