Christmas present demands

[Clockworkbananas]

Dsis and I only exchange presents for our children. A few weeks ago I messaged asking what her DD might want for Christmas, as I absolutely hate buying presents for the sake of it. She sent me a long list of ideas, mostly pretty expensive stuff like specific Barbie playsets, themed Lego, Disney play sets and dress up. I expected her to also ask what my DS would like given her list was so prescriptive, but she didn’t.

As I said it’s been a few weeks now and I’ve had a few messages from her asking when I can drop her DDs gifts off but still nothing asking what my DS might want? She’s also asking what I’ve bought so she can ensure her DD doesn’t have any duplicates that might ‘ruin her Christmas morning’. AIBU to think this is rude? If I wasn’t going to ask in return I wouldn’t have been so demanding on the initial gift list.

Message back 'Hi Dsis, not sure when I can drop DNeice's present over just yet. Here's DS's list, let me know when you are ready to exchange gifts'

Next year set a budget and if you have an equal number of children exchange cards only and label a gift as from each other. Much easier, especially as they get older and basically just want cash.

You asked for a list she sent one.

if you want her to buy from a list for your child then send her one.

Just sent her a similar response about ds's list...

Send her a list…?

Of course she wants to check re duplicates as she will be buying off the same list? If they are too expensive tell her but she is probably hoping to buy in the sales this week so don’t be a dick and not reply.

JUST TALK TO HER. Honestly these threads where people can’t ask close family simple questions but seem more than capable of creating drama are endless.

Stop buying presents then you wont have all this upset?

This for me screams sucking the life out of the meaning of Christmas.

You don’t like giving for the sake of giving - fine. But don’t moan because you perceive the suggestions as being too expensive.

It isn’t really for you to say how she wants to gift to your son. If she wants to buy your son a gift that she wants to give, without asking you first that’s up to her as the giver. She does not need to ask, she does not need to take on any of your suggestions if you send her some ideas.

Any gift given should be gratefully received no matter how big, small or whether you told her what to get for him or not. It does not matter how the gift came to fruition, all that matters is she made an effort to buy and wrap a gift and that should be appreciated.