My DS is 10 and has recently started saying he doesn't want to go to his Dad's. For context I also have a 12 year old DD who has refused to see her dad for 18 months. Section 7 has been done and recommends phone calls and contact on special occasions for DD and 50/50 care for DS. This is due to wishes and feelings of child. dS said he was happy to go, enjoyed etc...
DD gave cafcass her reasons of not wanting to see dad such as him getting angry throwing ds phone, giving silent treatment and forcing her to stay over when she didn't want to.
DS has always been scared of his dad but has gone along and seemed to be coping ok. He is now often crying to me saying he doesn't want to go, he's going to run back to me. He doesn't however say any of this to his dad. He messages me saying I miss you, I wish I was with you. Also he messaged saying he didn't want to play football but was to scared to see his dad.
I am worried about what I say to him, and how I handle it. I know full well his dad isn't good for him but how do I navigate it. I know I have to be seen to encourage him but I don't want to tell him to just go and get on with it I think it will do more damage in the long term.