To ask if you get grandparent broodiness

[Pavementworrier]

I don't at all. Nor did my parents. I want everyone to be happy by their own measures and values but don't want to have grandchildren come into existence so I can be a grandparent. But I know a lot of people feel really compelled by the idea.

My dd is only 14 but I’d love to be a grandparent. Obviously her choice so we will see.

Nope. I've got a pregnant DD (who lives overseas so is somewhat out of the equation) and a pregnant DIL at the moment. I'm interested, and try to show it when I talk to them, but I'm not obsessed in the way that the other GPs appear to be. It's not my child and I had five of my own, I am SO over the baby thing!

I'll love the offspring when they arrive but I won't want to 'mother' them. Done my time, thank you very much.

Im sure my mom would love to have more grandchildren. Nothing compared to my best friends MIL. It was so uncomfortable to stand next to her when she was at a party crying in hiw hard it is for her for not having grandchildren and hear the news of her son's friends having children. Well, she now has 2 grandchildren and moved cities to be available 24/7 for babysitting so I guess a happy ending.

Not in the slightest, my DC are 16 and 20 so hopefully no kids of their own for a bit anyway but if it was never I would be fine with that.

My DD had the grace to look a bit shamefaced lol. Said that I had a poin

I can see why your mum was amusedt

Why would you be sad if they chose not to have children?

My DC are late 20s early 30s but no sign of grandchildren yet. I'm not bothered either way, tbh. If I have grandchildren I'll embrace it, if not then it's fine. Whatever my DC want, I'll be happy with.

Because it’s something Pp will never get to experience…..at a time when lots of her peers are likely to be heavily involved with their families for a few years…..I was a Granny at 50 so no time to even think about it really…but at 60 most of my friends and colleagues are Grannies….we do Granny things together ( take the kids to festivals, days out) so I would have missed out on that…..and the loveliness of enjoying your GC without the stress of parenting them….the lovely times going to Christmas nativities…..holidays with them…..sleepovers….just being around little people again when your own have grown…..I guess that’s what Pp means by being sad….I love being a Granny ….I still work part time so visually they aren’t my whole life….but they are a big part of it for now ( until they are teenagers I guess) …..my own mum is 89 and has a lively bond with her GC ,,,,my DD takes her shopping every week and for cake……I’m not sure why you wouldn’t understand whatPP means?

I am child free by choice. Having seen the effect having grandchildren has had on my friends life in terms of the amount of child care they do I am even happier with my choice.

I have 3dc and I don't think I will have dgc in the future. I sometimes imagine what it would be like but I've lived that part of my life and made my own decisions. My dc are absolutely entitled to make their own decisions and I support them 100%

I have 5 grandchildren. But I've never done half that stuff. Never heard of doing " Granny stuff" with other women. Mind you 90% or my female friends are child free and only one has grandchildren and she lives in a different continent to them

Besidess the PP said she would feel sad for them ( presumably her own kids)

For those of you who are keen to be a grandparent, all I would say is please don't put pressure on your children, or even mention it. No snide comments about childfree people being "selfish"! Trust me, it's awful to feel that your parent is only interested in you because of the potential GCs. Let your adult kids make their own choices, and don't judge them for it - either way.

Oh an the PP actually wrote "EleanorReally · Today 09:29
i would privately be sad for my dc if this didnt happen"

So I'm not quite sure what relevance that is to you being enjoying being a grandparent. Maybe it was you that didn't understand what the PP meant. Seems quite clear to me she was talking about being sad for her own kids

Not at all - was just talking with friends about this yesterday - it's not in my power to make my kids want kids, or for things to fall out so that they are able to have kids if they want, so there's no point 'wanting' it. It's not in my control.

Kids are only teens right now, so there is time I suppose but I was never even especially broody for having children so expect the same re grandchildren. Oldest is adamant he doesn't want kids, I think if its to be either of them, it will be youngest but right now genuinely not bothered.

I’m already broody for grandchildren and my daughter is only 8! I see the bond my mother has with the kids and hope I can get something similar. I think it’s fine to not want that though.

As someone who was not able to have children and who lost a lot of friends when they had kids, Ive read on other threads that I need to leave my friends alone during their child raising years so they can just spend time with other mums etc because that’s understandably what they want. But apparently in about 20 years when they’ve raised their children they’ll want to be friends again and at that point I should look to rekindle all those friendships. But I guess that won’t last long as they’ll all then be grandparents and will rather just spend time with other grandparents! 🤣

Ah it’s a good job I resigned myself a long time ago to be content without friends!

I have 4 DDs (3 adult one almost teen) and have often thought about how lovely it will be to see them being a mum. NOT so much about me being the gran If that makes sense? It's about them. Seeing my girls enjoy their life.

Maybe because i'm still in the thick of raising my youngest.
Maybe because i'm not a very 'baby' person and am so over all that myself (not gagging to get involved with nappies and bottles ect again i've been there 4 times)
Maybe because the idea of me being old enough to be a gran is a bit daunting ?

In the light of all this - i now AM a gran 😀 GD is nearly 2 and she's lovely! DD1 is a FANTASTIC mum. I'm so proud of her!

I find just watching all the work she has to do with GD exhausting though. None of this wanting to take over that you read about here. Love GD - but happily hand her back as they say! My daughter is the mum. I look after and spoil her!

Hmm I've had 3 kids and majority of my female friends are child free ( seeing as we are in our 50s that's not likely to change)

So I suppose it depends the person. I certainly didn't want to hang about with other mums when my kids were small.

I wasn’t bothered at all, but certainly loved them once they arrived - I was 67 for the first.
What really would have upset me, was if either dd had wanted babies, but had been unable to have them.

Me. Had our 2yr old great niece round yesterday.
If I am lucky enough to live near my future grandchildren I know they would enhance my life so much, as I would theirs hopefully.

Gosh. I have a group of 6 lovely friends all 60+, 3 are parents, one of those is a grandparent, and 3 of us are are childfree/lesx. Nice balance.

It’s not odd - it’s just different to you.

I confess to being quite broody for a grandchild, but am not expecting to have one for at least 3 or 4 years, by which time I will be nearly 70, so I will have to be patient!

I would adore a grandchild. I had my kids in my late 30s though, and I expect my girls will do the same. But absolutely I’m looking forward to grand parenthood.

Absolutely not. Quite happy the both dds now in their 30s have chosen not to have kids.