Is this too mean?

[Supersimkin7]

Straw poll for wise women here. I think my mate at work’s been shat on. (We volunteer at the local household swap.) Do you agree?

He’s 51, has MS, now can’t work, lives in bedsit on housing and recently cut disability benefits. Meagre existence. Worked till 46. No wife or kids.

His family (parents) live same area in £2million house, inherited lots so they get about 65k a year retirement income. They 75.

He’s been referred to the food bank cos his income too low to eat, says doc. Parents don’t want to help ‘twice’. They gave £15 last year when his cupboards were empty. Bdays etc are a card and £50.00.

YABU = parents are fine and that’s normal.

YANBU = How tight can you get?

Ok so what other clues are there op? Is this someone with a couple of decent friends, a few ex work colleagues who check in, a sibling still in touch?

There may be a backstory.

If there isn't, I think it's awful but I'm not entirely surprised. When you read comments on MN and think 'I'd bet they'd think something different if they had disabled children of their own'. Well, sometimes people have disabled children and they resent them, they resent the sacrifices they have to make and once they can wash their hands of them they do.

He’s a disabled man who can’t work because he has MS, not a smackhead on a street corner.

His parents are cunts.

Hmm

What is he not telling you?

On the face of it, they are terrible terrible people. But I do wonder if theres more.

Is he in touch with them? Why does his sister get money from them? Why has noone else intervened? Does he ask them for support and get a flat out no each time? Has he laid out his situation to them, do they know how bad things are?

In my mind, I wouldnt be in touch with such people so its possible they dont know.

Christ, I am disabled with disabled dc I struggle sometimes but usually pretty good and I even get my nan offering to give me money as she worries I can’t afford to put my heating on. (I can bless her.)
his parents are cunts, hopefully they die soon and he can inherit.

People with money are some of the tightest people you'll ever meet.

I have MS, I don't think id want my parents digging me out of a hole.

I couldn't watch my kid going to the food bank from a £2million house no matter how old they were, I just couldn't. I'd sell my kidney to feed my dog, nevermind my child.

Unless there's some serious backstory they're awful, awful people.

Yep he’s got loads of very old mates who are nice guys, I’ve met a few of them.

No heroin or gambling or junkie isues! You’re all so right tho, I was convinced he had to be harbouring a dodgy past or misspent youth at very least. Nope.

TBH he keeps quiet about how rich his family is because he’s obviously brassic & dark suspicions are what people come up with, making his life even more pleasant.

DP are bound to go expensively demented anyway, doubt there’ll be an inheritance. Mate is already doing little jobs for them as they age.

Upside - he can’t do eldercare with MS and both parents now weigh more than he does anyway. Ha!

Ok then, they're not good parents.

Is he going to appeal his disability benefits being cut?

How do you know this man? You said ‘my mate at work’ but also that he’s not worked for 5 years.

I am all for standing on your own 2 feet but this man has health issues that mean he can't so his family should help

He is volunteering.

What carref did he have before he couldn't work?

If I were loaded I’d keep some for potential future care needs but I’d give my adult dc as much as possible before I died and they are all healthy and working.

They do go on about how ‘frail’ he is, which raises eyebrows - mine anyway - if they can see that why aren’t they helping?

What was he doing before he stopped working?

Oh my goodness, how could any parent do this? Many of us would give our kids our last penny.

Is there a bigger back story that you are not aware of?? 🥀

Agree with a pp, let’s hope they die soon and he becomes a millionaire as a result.