Flying as an unaccompanied minor at age 7

[CrispyClo]

I’m posting on behalf of my sister as she is looking for some external views on the matter.

My niece is 7, birthday was in August. She started a new school in September, which closes for Christmas a week earlier than most state schools. There don’t seem to be a lot of options for childcare during that week as not many schools here close that early so there aren’t any holiday camps.
My sister has booked my niece onto a week long camp abroad for the week. The camp is well reviewed and offers a pick up service for children flying as an unaccompanied minor. My sister initially felt this was a good idea, and booked it.
Now she is having some concerns and is unsure it’s the right choice, mainly as she appreciates 7 is quite young and while the flight isn’t particularly long, they don’t actually have someone sat with them, just cabin crew checking in. She has admitted herself she was fine with it until other people seemed to think it was a reckless parenting choice. I think it will be fine, my sister and I flew as unaccompanied minors often as our dad lived abroad, we were a bit older (maybe 10 the first time) but managed it fine.

AIBU to think my niece will be fine? She’s looking forward to the camp and doesn’t seem phased by the thought of it.

You can’t be that desperate for childcare surely?

My DC use to fly as unaccompanied minors to see their grandparents - a 2hr flight. The youngest had just turned 5 when they started.
They weren’t flying the same airline as your neice, but it sounds like they have the same process where the children are accompanied onto and off the plane. They sit all the unaccompanied minors together near kitchen so the staff can keep an eye on them. There’s usually quite a few kids. They wear lanyards and tracker bracelets which are scanned at boarding and hand over and they text updates so parents know where the child is. They are always the last group to get on and off the plane. The system worked really well.

Sounds like emotional abuse to me. When she goes non contact as a young adult, don’t act surprised.

Yes DD2 went for a week this year for PGL age 8 and had asked for 2 weeks next year

Yet - we were a drive away so could pick her up if needed asap vs flight

There can be a big difference between age 7 and age 8 in how they think and how ready they would be

The flight piece - it depends on how used to airports and flights they are. I assume you mean some kind of unaccompanied minors service where they are helped through. It could be fine if they have flown regularly enough to get used to airports.

Mainly - I don’t see an issue necessarily with the idea of camp abroad - but it feels potentially rushed at age 7

Especially when she is in a school of people breaking up and being off at the same time as her- the solutions are around you every day.

Maybe not inexplicable that the sister can't draw on any irl relationships to come up with a favour swap if the whole family are inculcated into thinking this solution is normal.

This is insane. Can she really not take time off work?

just another vote to say step-children and cousins travelled as unaccompanied minors on short European flights every school holiday for many years. Approx 1999 - 2012. I think the youngest one to travel alone was actually 5 (happy and confident child who was excited to do what their siblings had been doing).

No issues at all - ever. Either back then, or when grown. They were always extremely well-looked after and often spoilt by airline staff.

Difference is they were met by and staying with family at both ends.

Ignore all the pearl-clutchers and tell your sister to be guided by her own child - if she is looking forward to it, I’m sure niece will be fine. As long as it is easy for her to communicate with home, and there is a plan B if she’s at all anxious or unhappy while she is there.

Has the DD had much other experience staying away from home? I can only imagine she’s done other trips away and enjoyed them? My DS did nights away with Beavers from age 6 so built up confidence being away from home.

My DD flew as an unaccompanied minor when she was that age. She loved it and the cabin crew definitely looked out for her. She did it with no issues a couple of times a year to go visit her dad. Never had an issue.

It depends on the kid - DS was mature and outgoing. Actively would run to camps and forget to say goodbye.

Add in a flight, some strangers he wasn't familiar with, a strange country and potentially a strange language?
Nope too much.

The security blanket is being close by if they do get upset.

Just the thought of this makes me feel sick. Seven years old! That's so young. I don't understand how anyone can think this is ok.

Where are the parents in this?

Use your imagination, please. Everyone I've ever heard of who went to boarding school at seven cried themselves to sleep and were totally miserable

That's quite different though, isn't it? She was going to visit her dad.

Just because they exist doesn’t mean they’re not morally abhorrent

Being irresponsible and reckless, according to the account on here.

FFS Shes 7!!!!!!!!!

DH and I had a flight from Singapore to the UK a few years ago- a 14hr flight. An unaccompanied 8yr old girl was sat next to me. She spoke French. My 1st language is English but I speak enough French to get along. I translated the meal options to her and the relevant announcements etc.

We were vaguely chatting about why she was travelling to the UK, what she liked at school etc. She pulled her shirt right up to show me a mole she'd had since birth on her chest.

I happen to be a health professional with an advanced criminal record check (DBS) but none of the crew would know that. At the end of the flight, 1 crew member thanked me for chatting with the child and admitted that none of them spoke any French. I wasn't comfortable with it all. I could have been saying anything to this child and the fact she openly showed me her chest/stomach to a stranger didn't feel right at all.

If your niece speaks English/French then crew on Swiss air should be able to help her more than the child I looked after. I personally think 7 is too young to be doing unaccompanied trips.

The school where I teach, had its PGL residential a couple of weeks ago.

The children were year 6; they were with their friends and with familiar, trusted adults. They had a great time during the day but there were children who were upset and homesick once it was bedtime.

Sending a 7 year old to a camp abroad where she won't know anyone is such a batshit idea that I'm struggling to believe that the thread isn't a wind up.

Anyone with the money to do that has the money to pay for a week's childcare at home.

I did this as a child from age 7, transatlantic flights a few times a year. Cabin crew used to check in regularly, was always fine.

Multiple strangers are going to be entrusted with the care of your 7 year old niece, in country that she doesn’t reside in.

You and your sister are insane for thinking this ok.

How exactly do you expect your niece to cope if one of those strangers causes her harm?

It's a ridiculous and drastic solution to a week's childcare. If your sister can afford to put her DD on an international flight and pay for a week's residential camp then I'm sure she can pay for a nanny for the week at home!

Rich people doing rich people things!

My daughter is the same age and if you paid me a million quid I would not let her do this. She wouldn’t want to and me and my DH would be beside ourselves. She’s 7! She wouldn’t go to the loo in a restaurant today on her own, the only place she has ever had a sleepover is with my parents. No no no no.

Childcare issues so she’s being plonked on a plane and sent abroad to a camp?? Is this for real? No way. No fucking way. Why can’t her mother look after her? Work? Why can’t you? Work? Any grandparents around that give a shit? Or a Dad? Jesus sometimes you really have to question what is important, it’s a whole week? Can she not just juggle and have a really hectic week of spinning plates? WFH? Take her DD in to work? I can’t see in what world this is the best solution. I’m just picturing a 7 year old little girl sat on her own on a plane.

Are ANY of her friends going with her? At 7 (and only just) I just can’t imagine sending my daughter off to a foreign country without knowing one single person. I went away with my primary school at 11 and maybe I was a wuss but I still remember the unrelenting homesickness, it was awful.

Never mind the flight - being in a different country from my barely 7 year old daughter with absolutely no tangible idea what type of people are looking after her? Over my dead body.

can you really not see why most parents would never even consider this?

there MUST be better options.