Flying as an unaccompanied minor at age 7

[CrispyClo]

I’m posting on behalf of my sister as she is looking for some external views on the matter.

My niece is 7, birthday was in August. She started a new school in September, which closes for Christmas a week earlier than most state schools. There don’t seem to be a lot of options for childcare during that week as not many schools here close that early so there aren’t any holiday camps.
My sister has booked my niece onto a week long camp abroad for the week. The camp is well reviewed and offers a pick up service for children flying as an unaccompanied minor. My sister initially felt this was a good idea, and booked it.
Now she is having some concerns and is unsure it’s the right choice, mainly as she appreciates 7 is quite young and while the flight isn’t particularly long, they don’t actually have someone sat with them, just cabin crew checking in. She has admitted herself she was fine with it until other people seemed to think it was a reckless parenting choice. I think it will be fine, my sister and I flew as unaccompanied minors often as our dad lived abroad, we were a bit older (maybe 10 the first time) but managed it fine.

AIBU to think my niece will be fine? She’s looking forward to the camp and doesn’t seem phased by the thought of it.

I was at boarding school and started flying from far east to UK unaccompanied from age of 11. 7 is pretty young

Having helped out at Beaver camps (which are 1-2 nights and that age group), it feels very risky sending a 7 year old overseas. Beaver camps are with leaders the children know well, and with their friends. Even so there's usually at least one has to get picked up and taken home, because they can't settle. It's not always predictable who either.

Your DN will be in a country she presumably isn't familiar with, where presumably she doesn't speak the language, and won't know any of the adults or children there. There is also no way she can be collected if she does get upset!

I don't see how children boarding at 7 is relevant either, at that age they will have had multiple settling in visits before they first actually stay over. They aren't dropped off for the week never having stepped foot in the school before.

My almost 7 yr old is a frequent flyer (with us though) and very comfortable with planes/ airports and yet no way I’d let him go unaccompanied at this age abroad to a place I haven’t vetted myself in person.

My father was abroad when I was a kid and I flew alone all the time, younger than this too. You get checked on regularly and there is a kids lounge where they make sure you get on the flight ok. I enjoyed it, they used to seat me next to other kids flying alone, if there were some for the flight.

If the child is confident going to the camp, then the flight is not a major additional concern. I think a 1 week camp overseas aged 7 would challenge a lot of children but there’s a huge amount of variation.

My DS has been to a 5 night camp at just turned 8 (in this country and with a friend, so a little less daunting) and he had a wonderful time - and he’s struggled with bedtime anxiety for years so it was quite a big thing for him.

PGL run camps as well residentials for schools and clubs so it's not always the case that there will be teachers / leaders known to the kids.

I don't think the flight is a problem as she will be looked after. A week is along time to be away on her own abroad though. Lots of kids go to brownie camp etc around this age but it's normally a couple of nights and with friends. Has she done something like that and did she enjoy it?

It is very common where I live in the US - from aged about 8 or 9 on at the earliest. Not 7. People usually send their kids to the camp they went to - they are within driving distance, they know it well and often cousins and friends are going to the sam camp. They drop their child off. Visit for visiting days. and even then some kids don't really take to it. a 7 year old in another country requiring a minor accompanied flight - like why??

'They' do have boarding schools for seven-year olds. That doesn't mean they're a good thing, even if they are essential for some families in extremis - parental death, military posting etc.

Your niece, poor child will have gone through the hands of four strangers before she's even got to the camp, 8n a country not her own. Once there, she will be faced with yet more strangers. Saying she's OK about it means nothing. She's never done it before so how could she know?

I err to the liberal side when it comes to sleepovers (my daughter stayed the night with an old family friend before she was one) but I am quite shocked by this. A sixth former on the same school holiday schedule in her home town would be a better option - or the parents planning ahead so they can look after their daughter rather than trust her to a gaggle of strangers.

Actually, thats not true. I was sent to school in the UK having never seen it before and had to make my own way there in an unfamiliar country. I was 11 but this was the 70's and I think our childhoods back then were very different to how kids are raised today

Bloody hell, sending a 7 year old on a plane alone to go to a camp abroad alone- what is your sister thinking?

I worked in an American summer camp when I was 20 and the youngest age there was about 8. The kids did enjoy themselves but there were sooo many who struggled so much with being homesick and would cry every night. I remember thinking it was an incredible experience for them, but only for kids aged about 11 and over because so many little ones struggled.

can’t imagine sending my kid to a whole different country on her own. Madness.

while I don’t agree with boarding school at 7, it’s hardly the same thing. You at least know the teachers. Your sister won’t know these camp counsellors at all.

Concise and to the point. Totally agree.

Putting the flight aside. A 7 year old in a foreign country with no friends or family sounds very lonely. I imagine they would want their mum at some point.

Yes it is PGL that my DS has done in the holidays - we arranged for him to go with a friend but all other adults /children he had never met before.

Still seems alot for a 7 year old to deal with.
Flying and airports can be overwhelming and these people will be alien to your niece OP

Don't be ridiculous.

'Failure to Launch' does not come from being unwilling to send very small children on flights and away from home for a week to another country with strangers. I'd imagine it's much easier to prove that there are lots of negative outcomes associated with being so negligent and uncaring instead.

I've got teens who have launched beautifully but who were also appropriately safeguarded throughout their early years. Fancy that, you can do both!

How can you say with such certainty it's very good? What does very good even mean?

I think the idea for some of these families is to break the bonds. It's deliberate.

The flight and airport will be fine. Unaccompanied minors that young are usually well looked after

how do you know the camp? Has she been away from home before? What is their policy on mobile phones and calling home?

how robust is she?

if you think she will be fine, ignore all the naysayers here.

I don't think the camp is unusual. I know lots of kids who spend a week at camp in the summer. My daughter did a gymnastics camp for a week from 8yo in the summer holidays at her request and there's loads of PGL ones too so they must be popular! I would hesitate at the plane journey alone at 7yo honestly. I think that's maybe a bit much unless the child is super confident and eager to go.

I will say I do understand that both together may be too much at 7.

But I genuinely don’t think camps or flying as an unaccompanied minor alone are really that bad?

I did both, there are numerous camps around Europe, often with many British children, at various times of the year! Surf camps, ski camps, tennis camps etc.

😱Wealthy people should not be allowed to treat their children like this 😱
If the sister is high ranking in the serving military/a diplomat posted in a fragile state ... (ie explicable why the child can't come to them), then would it not be possible to organise a nanny at home with the allowances paid? If an international banker they can pay for a nanny at home anyway.
Much too young. I'm sure Swiss Air's service is impeccably brilliant but in context this is irrelevant.

It’s different though- you got picked up by your dad and spent time with him. Didn’t land and get greeted by a complete stranger and spend the week after that with a bunch of more strangers.
for me it’s not the flight part, it’s more being dumped to people / place the child doesn’t know and solely relying on online reviews .

They have boarding schools for 7 year olds?!

Mmm. Kind of proves that some things do exist that should never be used. Unless you particularly want your child crying to their therapist in 20 years.

Jeez my 16 year old is flying alone next year and I’m worried about her going through the airport on her own for the first time.

Nevermind a 7 year old having to navigate that alone. Definite no from me!

My DC is going to the US on a school trip for a week with teachers she knows and her best friends are also going. She’ll be 18 a few months after so she’ll be absolutely fine yet as her mother I won’t fully settle because she’s so far away and has never been away from home that long.

I think your sister is absolutely mad!! I’m actually surprised kids that young are allowed to fly solo because if they became distressed or poorly for example, the flight attendants would have to stay with them etc taking then away from the other hundred plus passengers.