To feel slightly sad...

[Madeamistake21]

I have a good friend, although been questioning friendship a lot. We help each other out with kids and horses. I always know when her birthday is.

I feel bad in saying she is very self centered. She didn't remember my birthday and then made out at 9.30pm after I had told her I was away for the weekend her facebook post to say happy birthday didn't post.... same thing happened last yr.

She phoned me last night, said sorry she wasn't around last weekend. Then went on to talk about herself for half an hour, didn't ask what I did for my birthday or did I have a nice birthday.

I always buy her a gift for her birthday which is in a couple of weeks but I feel I dont even want to.

Not really sure what I am wanting to hear but just sad that this is meant to be one of my best friends

Please don't buy her a present OP.
Let this be a first step in treating yourself well - by not acquiescing to others' treating you badly.

Do unto her as she has done unto you.

Sometimes you just need to match their energy.

Some people, myself included, simply do not see the point of making a fuss about birthdays of adults. However, her talking about herself for half an hour and not asking about you or showing any interest in what is going on in your life suggests that she is (a) extremely self-centered and (b) doesn’t care about you.

I wouldn't remember any of my friends' birthdays, nor they mine, and maybe she's like that. Don't buy her a present or mark hers.

I have a friend like this. I organised her significant birthday, coordinated approximately 80 people to attend a
party for her and sorted a shared,
expensive gift. She felt like a princess. Spoilt rotten & loads of attention. Been friends now for 14 years, our children have grown up together, she lives 2 mins away. It’s my big birthday soon. She can’t come. She said it’s too expensive which I get. However, she did then ask “when is your birthday? Lol! It’s so one sided. I have decided to put less energy into her. It’s wonderful & quite addictive. Try it!

I wouldn't get her a gift and if she asks you can just say you didn't think you were doing gifts anymore. Leave it there.

Yeah unless it’s a big one I don’t ask after mates’ birthdays. And I’d be surprised if they asked about mine. I’d definitely be surprised if my friends bought me gifts for a non-round-number birthday.

OP you sound like a lovely friend but I’m giving you permission to not buy her a present or ask about her birthday. If she doesn’t care about yours she probably doesn’t care about her own either, and adults exchanging birthday gifts isn’t the norm x

This.

Gradually withdraw, she's making you feel sad and used. That's not a good friend.

🌺