How to tell if an ex is rebounding or checked out

[Kingqueens]

That’s it really, my ex moved on really quickly after our 25 year relationship. He moved on with his best friends sister. I am still single 2 years later as I am still not over the whole thing and happy being a single mum to my children. I just thought I would ask the question. There are no lingering feelings any more (only that I wish he would step up as a dad) I just can’t imagine being with somebody else that quickly.l after such a long time (I am talking 2 weeks)

I’d be querying when did it actually start..

Oh I'm sure they were together much longer than that...

Everyone gets over relationship breakups differently. Some people do it by jumping into something new straight away. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. I know someone who has happily been with the woman he "rebounded" with for a decade now. I also know people who just go on endless rebound strings.

But really you shouldn't be worrying about it still 2 years on. What difference does it make now?

I sometimes (often) think this is a symptom of men's tendency to 'template' women. As long as the replacement meets the needs that the ex met, they just slot her in and don't worry about details such as whether they actually like or respect her - or even have much of a clue about who she is as a person.

A very short gap, though, usually indicates the replacement relationship had already started before the previous one ended. Two weeks is very short! In general, men dislike having to take care of themselves so prefer a seamless transition.

Sometimes it's simply that they can't live alone but I would suspect this started long before.

The truth is that everyone is different. Some people can't stand to be alone and head for the nearest person - sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't - and some people (sensible people to my mind) take longer to lick their wounds.

Two weeks sounds very quick to me (and would make me suspicious) but why are you worrying about it/thinking about it two years down the road? That's the bigger question to be honest.

I'm sorry you're not over it. You will though eventually.

Honestly, he didn't get with her within 2 weeks. She was already there which is why he left.

He might be a shit dad but you're a great mum. Remember that.

It isn’t that I am not over it. I have no feelings for him whatsoever it’s just hard being left to deal with everything whilst he drifts off into the sunset with this other woman.

although the past few weeks he has been really trying with the kids which I find odd.

Mate, it wasn’t 2 weeks

He swears blind he didn’t cheat on me

Of course he does 😂

I find the whole thing really odd. We split in the November and when he left on Christmas Day he was collecting gift bags from my children’s opened presents as apparently he doesn’t like to waste them. Turns out he just wanted to put his new woman’s gift and her son in a bag.

He will have fancied her before they got together even if he wasn’t with her. Probably thought she was an easy option to avoid being alone. Sounds like she didn’t have much in the way of standards or sense getting with someone that quick either.
It’s not your problem though so try to focus on yourself and stop giving him headspace.

So he was lying to you about that at the time... I suspect he was lying about other things too. I mean why would he be giving her son a gift if it hadn't been going on longer? Her I see - even after two weeks, yeah you buy your new love interest a token gift... but you don't buy stuff for her kid if you've been seeing her for a fortnight. How would he know what to buy for a start?

I know you say you are over him, but surely you can see why people are questioning this given your thread? Is it because Christmas is approaching?

Yeah, they all swear blind they didn't cheat. You'll find when the new woman gets sick of him, he'll come and expect you to give him sex tea and sympathy.