To still love people, even thought most seem cold, guarded or cynical these days?

[OpenOnPurpose]

I know we’re meant to be cautious and not “too nice” but I really do love people, not in a pushy way but just in general. I find people fascinating, funny, heartbreaking, beautiful. Even when they’re messy.

But I’ve noticed this shift, like the default setting now is distrust, sarcasm or eye-rolling detachment. Being soft or optimistic feels almost embarrassing sometimes, like you’re asking to be dismissed or hurt.

Still, I don’t want to become hard just to fit in. I’d rather love people and risk being let down than close myself off completely.

AIBU to still believe in people and to think that loving humanity isn’t naive, it’s necessary?

though not thought

Tbh, I haven’t noticed this at all.

Nah, most people really aren’t like you describe at all.

I love people. Not all of them and not always. It’s important to be discerning and its basic self preservation not to be overly trusting. But in general as a species I find people endlessly fascinating. And without wanting to sound like a dick, I can usually find something to like about most people.

I agree to an extent with what you say. I do think it’s fashionable at the moment to find people negative and there’s a lot of celebration of “introversion” (which usually means misanthropy, not introversion at all). I do think people have become more guarded and suspicious. I see it endlessly on here.

It worries me that finding social contact frightening or unpleasant has become normalised. People have different social energies and that’s fine but I think being able to find commonality with your own community and species is pretty central to health and wellbeing.

Bless you OP, I'll do my best to follow your example.

I feel this. Sometimes it’s just the town/place/country you live in though and when you move you realise you were just living in miseryville

I agree with you, OP.

I think people are conflating being antisocial with what @OpenOnPurpose actually said.

I am warm and friendly, and I find a lot of people don't like it so I've dialled it back.

Funnily enough, underneath, I'm highly cynical - but I used to think being warm and friendly was a good place to start. possibly it is - as I do think I've made a couple of friends recently but I just don't have much faith after being let down. I've done it though so I guess we'll see what happens.