MIL and dog

[Cinderella37]

MIL has a large, bouncy, long haired moulting dog- she is lovely but leaves a trail of hair in her wake! When we last visited (she lives 2.5 hours away) our 6 y old daughter (who is mildly asthmatic) needed her inhaler far more than usual. MIL is due to stay with us (along with FIL) in a few weeks and DH asked if she'd mind not bringing the dog as we are concerned it's affecting DD. She's taken umbridge and basically responded "if the dog can't go, we don't go" and also said a sitter would be too expensive. This is despite them regularly leaving the dog with sitters or family when they go abroad. The upshot is, she's now not coming at all. For context, we have a small poodle dog so I suspect she feels there's some hypocrisy - but she's hypoallergenic, doesn't moult and has never caused any problems for DD. MIL can generally be problematic especially when it comes to visiting us and this is the last in a long line of cancelled visits for various reasons (including DD's last two birthdays). I feel like she takes any opportunity to make an excuse not to come up and I find it quite draining / upsetting particularly on behalf of DH and the kids. AIBU?

How long has the visit been organised and did you discuss the dog when the visit was initially agreed? If it's been planned for a while I can see why she would be annoyed at being told rather last minute that they now need to sort out a sitter. Neither of you are in the wrong, but presumably when she goes away she is able to plan it around her usual sitters.

If you feel like she's making excuses have you offered to pay for the sitter?

Of course you aren't being unreasonable in not wanting her to bring her dog. I think it's really cheeky to expect to bring a dog when you are invited to stay in someones home, and especially one where there is a child and a resident dog.

If you feel she is regularly making excuses not to visit your H should be having a conversation with her to try and find out if there is some underlying issue she has that might be resolvable.

Your house, your rules! I’d call her bluff. It’s a real shame she can’t come etc etc
Of course YANBU for putting your child’s health first!
When I visit someone’s home I don’t pitch up with all my animals (though who doesn’t love goats?). Taking care of them while I’m away is my problem to solve. Likewise MIL’s dog is her responsibility.

Does she live in a nice house/area that might be attractive to house sitters? If so she could join Housesitters UK for about £30 and get a free dog sitter every time she goes away.