AIBU for keeping things “civil”

[hsmith77]

Hi! I have a tumultuous relationship with my
in laws specifically my sister in laws. Tbh I’m exhausted by it- a lot has been said and done and for the sake of DH I want to just keep things civil. I was a people pleaser but after posting and having amazing feedback from mumsnetters I am starting to stand my ground :) - however that’s obviously caused more issues 🤦‍♀️

Apparently being civil with one another still is not good enough. I’ve been accused of being “fake” and that being “civil” isn’t good enough in a “family”. Essentially, they want us all to live in each other’s pockets, have no boundaries, have me magically forget about all the shite that’s happened and be happy about it.

These are women in their 40s and 50s by the way. Am I being unreasonable for just wanting to keep things to ‘hi, bye, how are you etc” or should I forgive and forget? Ty! x

ps. Any advice feom anyone who’s been in a similar situation with difficult in law relationships? Any advice on how to bloody navigate it especially when children are involved?

How come you seem to have so much interaction with them? Do you all live
on each other’s doorsteps?

We do all live in the same town and MIL lives with us as she’s elderly.

Yeah, nah. Wanting isn't the same as getting.

What a limp lettuce of a DH you have OP

Is this the other side of all those threads from that one poster who kept complaining that they should be allowed to visit their mum at their brother and SIL's house any time they wanted with no prior notice, including when the heavily pregnant SIL was trying to put her existing kids to bed?

Oh, good catch. That’s exactly what this is.

Oh blimey not this again 😂