AIBU to not let 10yo have TV in bedroom?

[Covgal83]

It’s a definite no to phone/ipad past a certain time. That’s non-negotiable. But he’s asking for a TV screen and his PS5 (which we can most likely time off) in his room. All his good friends have this at least (if not, unfettered access to all screens all the time). I’m the meanest person in the world apparently. AIBU?

(To add: we’ve got a 13yo DD who’s been fine with this; me and DH don’t have screens in our room - I’m a terrible insomniac and it would be awful for me).

No screens in bedrooms. I got push back for a couple of years but she’s a happier teenager because of the rule.

I hate TVs in any bedroom so we don’t have them.

No. I suffer from insomnia. Screens have n bedrooms are a no-no.

I’m mid 50s. Never had a TV in the bedroom. Nor have my kids (now both at uni still without TVs).

No, mine can have a tv in their bedroom when they have their own home 😂
or at least, more realistically, once they have their A'Levels.

I am the meanest person too. It's not untrue that many kids have them, but frankly it's lazy parenting from adults who don't want to hear or see the video games or the kids programs.

If nothing else, it's a good thing that they dont' have a reminder of screens at all time. You can still send them to their bedroom where they have to occupy themselves.

My sons never had TVs in their rooms. We would never have seen them if they did! 😂However, I do have a TV in my room. In a house with six men, I deserved a place that was all mine!

Dd1 and 3 got them at age 13 (dd1 was during Covid and we couldn’t go anywhere or do anything so it brought our age forward). They use them really sensibly, often watching with a sibling (dd2 didn’t have one as she didn’t want one). They’re not allowed phones upstairs so it’s a balance. They still come down for lots of family time so I’ve not put in the strict rules I expected to need. We have a TV in the dining room as well as the main living room but the dining room one is small and rarely used.

I think, with all these things, it depends on the family and the dc. Just because my dc aren’t obsessive with the tvs in their rooms doesn’t mean yours won’t be. I’ve just realised we have a TV in our room and only used it as an alarm, waking up to the news each morning (links to our jobs). It got really depressing and at some point we started using a standard alarm. I don’t even know when but the TV hasn’t been turned on for more than a year.

I got my ds a TV for his room when he was 15...but for the duration of his gcses he had to bring down the remote control at 10pm.

I never let any of my children( now adults with own homes) have a TV in their room. When my son wanted to game he had to do it downstairs on TV or pc.
Of course you're the meanest person ever born but you're going to be that anyway if you ever have any rules about anything.

Anecdotal I know, but was actually talking about this with my son recently, he's still close friends with a group of 5 or 6 people from school who all had quite strict parents( including me) with no TVs in bedrooms, restricted TV and gaming time etc, all of them got top GCSE/A levels and now successful doctors, barristers/ solicitors, etc.

Definitely not at 10! Maybe after A levels!

We learnt this the hard way. The older boys had in rooms and were gaming at all hours. And yes we put on WiFi controls but they played offline etc. We ended up putting all consoles in a games room so we could keep a physical eye on it as well. It changed their habits (started reading etc) and made the difference to one between scraping GCSEs and getting good grades (going onto get excellent A levels).
Youngest has much broader interests, doing better at school etc

No screens in the bedroom (for adults or children, in my view)! And, I bet most of their friends don't have them either.

We had this rule, no TV in bedrooms. Do you have another space downstairs for video games, if so this is a better option.

Research years ago linked TV in kids bedrooms to worse grades. Bedroom should be for reading, playing, sleeping.

My sons are now 20 and 17 . Never had a TV/gaming system in their room. They asked for one I said if you pay for the aerial extension etc.....🤭

Up to you innit?

I’m surprised by these answers; mine all have TVs in their rooms (teens now). I’m not aware of any of DCs friends not having TVs in their rooms.

No. I did allow my DD at 12, we lost touch for a bit, not allowing DS, he's 10.
DD was a good child and would only use when allowed.
DS has the downstairs, if he wants to watch a movie upstairs then he can use an ipad.

I didn't have a tv in my room till I was 16. It was the rules. We had the main telly in the lounge and my parents had an ancient tv (and i mean ancient, it didn't even have a remote control) in their room that we could use if we wanted to watch something alternative to what parents were watching downstairs. It wasn't a thing when I was young and I was always amazed if a friend had a tv in their room. All I had was books.

YANBU
I know I'm in the minority but I'd never have a TV in the kids rooms....I like spending time with them...and I like them to read/ make/draw/ sew...even if it means a lot more tidying up. I want them to live in the real world not a screen one.

Nope. No screens in bedrooms. Not phones, not tablets, not TVs. DS asked when he was 11 but very easily accepted 'no screens in bedrooms' (which I was surprised by) and no one's muttered about it since!

So my 10 (nearly 11) year old has asked for a curved gaming monitor for his bedroom for Xmas and we have said yes... I am quite particular about screen time as well though, and it will absolutely Only be a gaming monitor Not a TV. He uses a Nintendo switch and it times out after an hour (sometimes he's allowed an extra half hour if he's in the middle of a good game with a friend), and like his tablet, turns off completely at 7pm. I don't see an issue with it tbh! Neither him nor me have a problem with him playing on the big screen in the lounge (which is what he goes now) but He is also convinced it will improve his game play 😂 we will see!

His 12yr old sister has a TV in her room that they share when OH and I want to watch something not child friendly downstairs in the evening (very rare, once a fortnight) or on a Saturday afternoon, but the rule is that she has to let her brother share, and the remote control is an app on her phone that I can block in-between times 😁

She obviously wishes it wasn't so but doesn't complain too much!

No!

I’d never let a kid have a tv in their bedroom. Basic parenting surely?

This is what I've said to daughter as I too didn't have a TV till that age (& even then it was a bloody tiny black and white one!)... I considered putting a TV in our room for that reason but her room is the biggest so seemed the best idea 🤷‍♀️

Following this post though I am tempted to move it to the store room in between times as it's pretty big and probably quite a distraction, even though she can't use it 🤔

Food for thought.

We only had one TV in the living room when I was growing up. I didn’t have my own until I was 22 and had left uni!

But if I’m honest I absolutely LOVE watching TV snuggled up in my bed with a cup of tea so my DC also had one from 13. We both love a binge watch and watched many things together over the years (he’s an adult now) but we agreed there’s only so many emergency service dramas (me) and episodes of Doctor Who (him) we could stand so I took my police car to my room and he took his Tardis to his!