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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for help in sorting out my disaster of a life?

13 replies

TheDancingHorses · 16/11/2025 21:05

I don’t really know where to start with this but I’m stuck in a miserable rut and need some help to get my arse into gear. There’s 3 main reasons for this:

  1. I lost my only sister in May this year and don’t think I’ve in anyway started to process this. For context, my mum also passed away last year so I’d only really started getting over that when my sister fell ill. I’ve focussed my energies on trying to support my 3 children and my sister’s 3 children and been putting on a strong face very day to get through work etc.

  2. My daughter (22) had her first child earlier this year. The baby’s father decided that the whole partner/parent thing wasn’t for him a week before the baby was born so my daughter moved back home and has been with us ever since. I’ve been trying to support her through the break up (turns out he was an absolute piece of work) and help with the baby who is adorable but it’s exhausting. I don’t want to be resentful as my DD didn’t ever want to end up in this situation but I barely get a minute that I’m not working or helping with DGD, or trying to do things with my other DD (13).

  3. my relationship with DH is crap. We’ve struggled for years with in-law issues as his family have continually treated my and my kids like crap but DH has a pattern of minimising their behaviour prioritising his birth family over us. He pretty much checked out emotionally around 5 years ago and I’ve been carrying everything since then. Things came to real head a couple of months ago and he went to stay with his dad for a few weeks so we could both decide whether we wanted to work on things or call it a day. We decided to give things another go but it’s only been a few weeks and I can feel things falling apart. He barely listens to anything I say, every conversation turns round to him, and I still can’t properly trust him to have my back.

all in all, I’m exhausted, lonely and have no real life of my own. It’s sad to say but I don’t have any friends where we live - we moved several years ago but I’ve never had time or space to do things as I’ve always put my DH and DC’s need first, and spent years helping care for DM and the DSis.
I know it’s on me to turn things around but I’m lacking inspiration and energy to do this right now. Any ideas would be very gratefully received!

Thank you.

OP posts:
OnceAgainDifferent · 16/11/2025 21:19

This is an incredible amount to deal with, OP.

You've lost your sister, and you need some space to grieve.

I think maybe some of these things you're doing for others need to be deorioritised.

22 year old DD is a mum and so are you. Yes her situation sounds stressful, and luckily she has been able to stay with you. But I think she should really be doing the lion's share of caring for her DD. Decide what you can help with comfortably and stick to it.

I expect all this going on with your DH is making you feel lonelier. There's someone around who is supposed to be there for you, and he really isn't so that must make everything worse. I think, either tell him to leave or simply start ignoring him completely and focus on your own needs. If possible, seeing friends and doing things you actually want to do.

The way I see it - the priorities here are looking after your 13 year old, keeping an income, and getting some space, rest, and peace for yourself. You deserve that. Everything else can drop.

Threesacrow · 16/11/2025 21:42

I'm so sorry you're having a rotten time. Losing your mother and sister so recently is terribly sad. You'll want to feel that you're caring for her DC too, but don't take on too much. You're grieving, too.
DH hasn't supported you at all, it's all about him and that's just not fair. Time for you to decide that he should leave, his behaviour is draining you.

Your daughter is lucky to have a home with you, but she is an adult - she is responsible for looking after her baby and doing her share of the housework. Your other daughter needs your attention more, she's also going through a lot. Can you arrange some time off to do some fun things with her?

Givenupshopping · 16/11/2025 22:05

I too am really sorry for everything you're having to cope with OP, losing two people you love in less than a year is incredibly hard, and if you haven't given yourself time to grieve, you really need to.

It sounds like having made the decision to try again with your husband has backfired, and isn't working. In fact it sounds like he is just another weight on your shoulders. Are you ready now to accept that the marriage is over, as he's clearly not giving you the support you need having experienced two such awful losses? If you're ready, then tell him that he needs to go, he's not adding anything to your life, he's had the opportunity to make things better, and hasn't made the necessary effort, so it's time to knock it on the head.

Then, once he's gone, tell your 22 year old that while you're aware she never expected to be a single Mum, she's lucky that she's had the family home to fall back on, but you still have a teenager to care for, and a job to do, so she needs to step up and mother her own child, and contribute to the household in whatever way she can.

Meanwhile, could you afford to take a holiday? If so, then I think it would do you good to go away somewhere on your own, and think about what YOU really want from your life at this point in time. I would suggest some grief counselling too, it may or may not work for you, but it would give you the chance to make time for yourself to actually talk about your grief, which may, from what you've said about how busy your life is, be being pushed down, and could end up making you ill.

How is your own health at present, are you doing anything to care for YOU? Do you get any exercise at all, if not, then at least try fitting in a walk in nature every day, even when it's raining, preferably go to a park or woodland or the beach if you have anything like that near you, but if not, then just go for a walk at a good pace, around the place you live in. The faster you walk, the better, especially if it's cold/raining, as you will exhaust yourself, but in a good way, and will feel loads better when you get back. Is having a bath something you enjoy? If so, then make it sacrosanct, run a nice bath with some bubbles or whatever you prefer, take a book if you enjoy reading, and maybe a glass of wine, and tell everyone that you are NOT to be disturbed. Another thing, are you getting enough sleep? If not, try and get an early night at least once a week, just one good night's sleep can make a world of difference. Finally, can I ask how old you are OP? As this would make a difference to advice that others might give you.

Sending you a big hug, you're not alone.

BestieNo1 · 16/11/2025 22:17

TheDancingHorses · 16/11/2025 21:05

I don’t really know where to start with this but I’m stuck in a miserable rut and need some help to get my arse into gear. There’s 3 main reasons for this:

  1. I lost my only sister in May this year and don’t think I’ve in anyway started to process this. For context, my mum also passed away last year so I’d only really started getting over that when my sister fell ill. I’ve focussed my energies on trying to support my 3 children and my sister’s 3 children and been putting on a strong face very day to get through work etc.

  2. My daughter (22) had her first child earlier this year. The baby’s father decided that the whole partner/parent thing wasn’t for him a week before the baby was born so my daughter moved back home and has been with us ever since. I’ve been trying to support her through the break up (turns out he was an absolute piece of work) and help with the baby who is adorable but it’s exhausting. I don’t want to be resentful as my DD didn’t ever want to end up in this situation but I barely get a minute that I’m not working or helping with DGD, or trying to do things with my other DD (13).

  3. my relationship with DH is crap. We’ve struggled for years with in-law issues as his family have continually treated my and my kids like crap but DH has a pattern of minimising their behaviour prioritising his birth family over us. He pretty much checked out emotionally around 5 years ago and I’ve been carrying everything since then. Things came to real head a couple of months ago and he went to stay with his dad for a few weeks so we could both decide whether we wanted to work on things or call it a day. We decided to give things another go but it’s only been a few weeks and I can feel things falling apart. He barely listens to anything I say, every conversation turns round to him, and I still can’t properly trust him to have my back.

all in all, I’m exhausted, lonely and have no real life of my own. It’s sad to say but I don’t have any friends where we live - we moved several years ago but I’ve never had time or space to do things as I’ve always put my DH and DC’s need first, and spent years helping care for DM and the DSis.
I know it’s on me to turn things around but I’m lacking inspiration and energy to do this right now. Any ideas would be very gratefully received!

Thank you.

Can you do a course where you have up get out once a week for a couple of hours and this is ringfenced for you ? Many many women fall in this trap because of society’s expectations. Good news you have time to start putting yourself too. I read a book called Womanhooded which has some action plans to get back to you. May be a good place to start.
i am so sorry about your Mum and Sister xxxxx but glad you have a beautiful new grandchild. What a blessing!

Praying4Peace · 16/11/2025 22:30

God OP, you are dealing with a mountain of emotional pain and physical exhaustion due to circumstances.
I don't know what to say that will make any difference but losing your mum and only sister is absolutely tragic and please allow yourself to grieve and cry as much as you want to.
Re your daughter and gc, that is totally exhausting and you must set boundaries to ensure that you have some space.
Don't make any rash decisions re your marriage right now.
Moment by moment and step by step.
Can you find something that you can do just for yourself (ie pilates /walking group as some examples) to start regaining a sense of self?
Re not having any friends, you can make friends anywhere.
I have recently moved and say hello to my neighbours and people at my pilates class. Most people are friendly and don't have to be intrusive. A good start.
Please take care of yourself OP, you are very special and have been through so much

Heronwatcher · 16/11/2025 22:34

Don’t have much advice but just a few things.

It sounds like it might not have been the right thing to do to give things another go with your partner so soon. It sounds like it’s not working at the moment and it’s
making things worse. Could you agree to a longer separation with him? Or bite the bullet and just start proceedings for a divorce.

As others have said you’ve had a huge amount of grief to deal with. Be kind to yourself, it’s an achievement that you’re holding things together at all.

Other than that are you getting all the help you could, financially and mentally? Have you checked your benefits? Also could you speak to your GP about counselling or other support if you feel it would be helpful?

Shrewsbury247 · 16/11/2025 23:06

Bless you - That’s such a lot to deal with. You need time and space to process your feelings.
how would you feel if you and your DP split?

TheDancingHorses · 17/11/2025 17:28

Thank you so much to everyone who has responded, your support and kind words are just what I needed. So much so that I took myself off for a long walk yesterday evening and had a good cathartic ugly crying session.

I haven’t had a break from work all year (other than to help care for my sister in her last few days and then bereavement leave) but I am very lucky to work as a tertiary educator which means I get two months off over the Summer (we live in New Zealand) - I finish in a couple of weeks so just hanging in there until then. I will definitely plan some stuff with my youngest and take time to rest as well.

As far as DH is concerned I think I’ll give myself the summer to look after myself as much as possible then I’ll be in a better position to decide what to do. Sadly, his own dad is very poorly and may pass in the near future so I don’t want to do anything drastic right now. This may explain his current behaviour a bit but it’s hard to live with when he’s not shown much support when I’ve been going through stuff. He also lost his mum just over 3 years ago so I sometimes think we’ve both been through a lot and he just doesn’t have the capacity to support me when I’ve needed it. I exhausted myself looking after our family, house and working while his mum was ill and after she passed and would’ve appreciated just a little of the same when I was going through similar with my mum but didn’t get it and I think there’s a lot of resentment there too.

Thanks again, your responses really mean a lot.

OP posts:
Irememberwhenitwasallfieldsroundhere · 17/11/2025 17:33

I'm so sorry for your loss. It must be very hard parenting your own children and your dd's child and your sister's children, that's a lot of hard core parenting, amidst grief too, even harder.

I agree with a PP who said your DD needs to step up and take responsibility and so does your DH. And you need to be extra specially kind to yourself. What is the thing that takes up the most of your time and energy? Is there any way that can be shared or reduced or minimised?

Wayk · 17/11/2025 21:50

Sorry to hear all you have gone through. Take baby steps. Could you cut back on work or maybe help your daughter pay for childcare? Once you have a clear head think about your marriage. It is draining you . Book a few days away when you get your holidays, even go to a hotel not too far away for a few days and literally just do nothing. Best wishes

Givenupshopping · 17/11/2025 22:37

I'm so glad you took a nice long walk and had a good old cry OP, it never ceases to amaze me the difference a bit of basic physical exercise can make, and releasing all those pent up tears is so good for you too. Obviously I realise that one walk won't solve all your problems, but it does sound as if you've been able to sort your thoughts out a bit, so that's a really good thing. Please don't be afraid to come back if you need more support as time goes by, you've been through, and are still going through an awful lot, and we all need some sort of support, even if it's from strangers on the internet. Take care of yourself!

CosySeason · 17/11/2025 22:59

I’m sorry for your losses.

I think you need to put down what you can. Your DD and her baby - They are safe so step back and let her be more independent. Does she have a plan to get back on her feet?

You need to pour into your own cup first.

OnceAgainDifferent · 18/11/2025 08:33

I'm glad our responses have been helpful and that you have some time off coming.

A slight word of caution here, too. You are clearly very capable, caring, and good at helping others. I'd be slightly worried that others might start expecting this from you, and when you have time off, you could find your time being quickly taken up. Which means you could finish the two months feeling just as depleted.

I think you may need to be very clear (with self and others) that your time off does not mean you're more available to help, or that your current level of caring and self sacrifice is sustainable.

You're going through an awful lot, and really need some real time/space to look after yourself to avoid completely burning out.

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