How to come to terms with being poor(er)

[Somewhereonlywego]

Due to a range of events, we're in a difficult financial situation now. Not in poverty by any means, we have a roof over our heads and food on the table, but two young kids and no idea how we're going to afford all the nice little extras as they get older, let alone holidays.

We both used to be in high paid jobs so never had to worry about that, but a few bad decisions and health issues make this seem unlikely to be the case again.

I have so much to be thankful for, but I need to learn to adjust my expectations and attitude.

I think this is maybe the nub of the matter. Your self worth being tied into your successful job and therefore the money that came with it.
kids don’t always need help with big ticket items, it’s life that many many people can’t do this.
Your kids can get Saturday jobs as early as they can and want to, they get their money from this and will also make friends through it so it’s enjoyable for them.
my parents gave me no help towards university, my mums version of help was we’d batch cook food together and I’d go back to uni armed with lovely home cooked meals for my freezer and I loved it!!!

maybe you can reframe your mindset of being thank ful for everything wonderful you do have, and do not let a few bad career choices and “what could have been” deter you from having enjoyment in your life now

I can so relate to this post. My hubbie and I gave up our well paid jobs after realizing we could free up a lot of money from our house and take a break. We relocated. We were exhausted supporting our autistic kids and thought we could make our money last and just be with them. Now though the money is running out and

Yes post Covid has done this to my family. It’s very hard to forgive yourself because as the responsible adult you always want to make life easier, nor harder, for your kids.

But you will have to forgive yourself and move on because life is like this sometimes and has been like this forever, for richer for poorer, and you still have to make a happy childhood for your kids and protect them from adult concerns for as long as you possibly can. This can happen to anyone and it does happen often. Don’t waste time with regrets. Live in the now.

Could you open premium bonds accounts for your children and whenever you are asked by family or friends what they would like for Christmas or birthdays, suggest a donation to the account? Kids have far too much ‘stuff’ nowadays and I’ve found that more and more, mine are being given cash, vouchers and even a direct bank transfer to our accounts. I’m sure closest family and friends will understand that it makes sense. I just wouldn’t ask for that directly if people have already thought of an actual present. Just use it as a back up