Long baths for 8 month old

[VividPanda]

My husband get our child ready in the mornings, most day she has a bath for 30 min with our son. He loves it and so does the little one, they play with boats and have a great time. I’m worried about his skin drying out but he won’t listen to me, instead he says I’m being irrational as he has been doing this for months and the child’s skin in fine (though he did have slightly dry skin on his cheeks for a few weeks but that cleared up). He doesn’t wash him with soap every day, it’s more a playtime, but I just wonder if I’m being unreasonable. NHS says baths should be 5-15 min, interested to know what other do?

You’re making it about you and are coming across as controlling. Just let him parent your DC in equal measure and lighten up. No harm is being done and the bath time sounds lovely.

I just can’t get past anyone having 30 spare minutes in the morning to fanny around doing a bath 😆

But as others have said, this is not a problem, your kid is fine, they’re having a nice time together and you’re not the senior parent

I would too if I were him. It is guidance, not law. The children are fine, they are all having fun. Stop micromanaging and consider if there is something heightening your anxiety. Might you have PND?

Or perhaps that you are being too controlling?

You sound very hard to live with. I would be more worried that your neurosis and controlling tendencies may start to damage your relationship.

But you're wrong.

As evidenced by your DS enjoying the bath and not having dry skin.

Do you want your DH to follow your instructions even when you're wrong? To the detriment of your children. How bizarre.

Let him enjoy bath time and get some moisturiser out for after if you are that bothered . Kids love playing in water , let him have his fun fgs

Wow, I've never ever thought about how long a bath , should be, let alone looked for the guidelines. Sorry but you sound really controlling over something that doesn't matter.

You’re micro managing him, I’d also laugh at you and ignore you. Stop thinking you’re in charge or the boss. Stop reading ridiculous guidelines and enjoy your baby and family before you lose them

Honestly the advice isnt a rule book.

Guess what I'd suggest? A few drops of olive oil in the bath? The websites would crash if they "heard" that. But that's honestly what worked for my kid's dry skin. Who told me? An old West Indian woman with 9 kids and about a million grandchildren. Health visitor said I'd drop my slippery baby. Baby is now a teen with great skin.

It's a guideline, not a mandate.
chill!

I can totally relate to you OP. It sounds like you might be dealing with more than a usual amount of anxiety and are responding to it by trying to control your DH.

If your DH actually does do as you're asking, he's only going to reinforce the ideas you have that the problems are actually real and valid. It's better for your health if he carries on as he is doing practicaly and just tries not to get frustrated with you.

Are you a more anxious person in general? Or feeling more anxious since having your baby? Consider talking to your GP or HV.

It’s advice, not a rule. You’re an adult, you need to differentiate between something that isn’t really important, providing your baby doesn’t have a skin condition, and what is important, such as red flags for seeking urgent health care.

If you are concerned re dry skin, choose a different bath product and look at lotions suitable for babies skin.

Agree with PPs that the bath is not an issue, you should drop that one. Only thing I would think is that it’s setting up a routine that is not going to be feasible long term and if they are expecting a bath every day before school and not wanting to get out etc it could become a problem then.

you are being ridiculous. a bath for a baby can be as long as you like, as long as the baby gets washed and enjoys it.

stop trying to control your husband and his interactions with your kids

are you very anxious? is this something you need to work on?

You’re going to destroy your marriage if you insist on nitpicking over things that don’t actually matter.

Seriously though @VividPanda, are you ok? You don’t sound ok at all.. do you have someone in real life who you can discuss your anxieties with?

Because you’re being silly. I have severe eczema and have baths over an hour long and they’re actually helpful for my dry skin. Especially if I add Dead Sea salts and moisturise straight after.

Your kids skin isn’t dry which means it’s coping fine with the baths.

This is nuts. Unclench, now.

I am glad I don't live with you OP you sound very hard work

I really don't blame him! Leave the poor guy alone

Honestly OP your DH sounds like a great and hands on Dad. Be glad he has bonded so well with his DC. Let him build his relationship with his DC and you build yours.

Yes op, you are fortunate he is hands on.

If there was any problem with the bath, you would have seen it by now. I used to put mine in an early evening bath for playtime with pouring cups etc when it was too rainy for the park after nursery and would sit with a book on a chair beside the bath. No soap unless actually dirty.

The dry cheeks will be the change in weather.

Put a pack of disposable baby wipes near where the dishcloth is - maybe even leave the lid open (with one sticking out waving at him!) so it is as easy for him to grab as the dishcloth.

But ultimately your dc will suffer more from having bickering parents or a dad who no longer wants to spend time because he is told he did it all wrongly.

OP has likely got way too much time on her hands. Time for some KIT days perhaps

@McSpoot How many threads are you going to start about how awful your husband is with your son?

This.
By my count this is the third thread the OP has started along these lines. Also I swear the baby has been three different ages over the last few days 🤔