I found a lovely Xmas party dress...

[DiscoBob]

Just as a bit of background, I'm broke and on benefits so can't afford to buy clothes until I really need to. So obviously no budget for an Xmas outfit. I have accumulated plenty of clothes over the years so not a problem.

I also just a couple of weeks ago donated a very large bag of decent stuff to a charity shop. Not designer but not Primark/Shein etc and a couple things that are really quite lovely but just don't fit me.

Today I happened upon a huge pile of clothes spilling out of several bin bags dumped outside a shut charity shop. I had a rummage and came upon a lovely Topshop sequinned mini dress in my size. I was delighted.

When I got home I tried it on and it looked fab. I told my mum and she first of all said it was great.

But then sounded concerned, she said 'oh, I wonder if the person who left it there will mind?'

I was pretty astonished and replied that if they were so precious about their discarded clothing they shouldn't dump it in the middle of the street. Knowing it won't be discovered for at least 24 hours by shop staff. By then it'd probably be soaked from the rain.

Am I in the wrong to think it's completely morally correct to take things in this circumstance?

Or was my mum right? Would you be upset if you somehow found out an item of your fly tipped clothing went straight into a wardrobe rather than possibly making a bit of money for a charity?

Interested to hear everyone's views. TIA.

I donate my old clothes to charity. There are big charity bins in my area. I actually leave bags of clothes outside those bins just in case someone local who needs new clothes wants to have a rummage first. I think most people who donate clothes just don't want them to go to waste.

I really need to see a photo of the dress now.

And no, you shouldn't feel bad.

I don't get it, you're so sure you're not unreasonable so why even post on AIBU if you're just going to argue with people that disagree with you?

I think her mum had put the doubt in her head.

TBF it was a pretty brief convo as once she said it I was kind of speechless then immediately went to make this thread, haha!

I watched a bin man taking away several black bags outside a charity shop and they were dumped in his cart and other rubbish put in top.
People shouldn’t leave stuff outside these shops - you saved the dress from landfill. Enjoy it!

Exactly that.

Beside the point, but if you are struggling to afford clothes then selling on vinted would at least gain you something to put towards clothing? Particularly as you said it wasn’t super low end.

If she truly doubted whether what she'd done was correct or not she wouldn't be arguing with anyone who has a different opinion.

Well, that would certainly cut the number of AIBU threads by a significant amount.

Every charity shop will bin anything left outside, even if it got dumped 10 minutes before they open.

Probably, but as it stands we could rename it "I don't think I'm unreasonable but can you come give me validation anyway."

From a purely selfish point of view, I'd have to donate some money even if it's a fiver. I have a very prickly conscience and I know I'd never be able to enjoy wearing it otherwise.
I'd donate a fiver if that's what I could afford and then be able to thoroughly enjoy my dress guilt free.

Oh come on.

Of it's any help, my friend worked at a charity shop and said loads of clothes had to go to be recycled when they they ran out of room anyway.
When I've donated stuff I'm just glad to have a bit freed up space which is what the person who dumped it did. They weren't bothered about the charity making any money or they would've donated when it was open. I dont give it a second thought, once I've taken it in it's gone.
They've made money on stuff you previously donated so you've done your bit.
It would've got ruined in the rain, the dew, got pissed in by a fox etc.
Ignore the people saying you stole it and enjoy it. No different to people going through skips or going through bins outside food stores.
The person who donated was basically throwing it anyway. I'd be pleased if my things went to someone for free especially if they loved it this much.
Why shouldn't you have a bit of charity if things are difficult at the moment which is the same for many people at the moment.
Gets down from soapbox....
Enjoy your new dress.!!

Thank you. Tbh I don't really have anything left I could sell right now. But yeah it's definitely a good idea in principle.

Thank you! X

I didn't think I was unreasonable, same as everyone else on AIBU. But someone else thinks I am and I want to hear what others views are on it. Pretty standard surely?

And that is ok, if you can afford to do so.

People dump things outside charity shops because it’s literally the easiest option beyond throwing them in the bin. Don’t feel bad; they could have taken the trouble to check when the shop was open but they didn’t bother.

I have worked in charity retail for over 10 years . If donations are left on the street and not handed over to staff then it’s disposed of and goes straight in the bin. This has been the official guidance for all three charities that I have worked at. At least you’ve saved it from the bin !

@DiscoBob YANBU, it’s not like you hauled the whole thing into the back of your car or something. I understand that dumping bin bags of stuff outside closed charity shops is becoming increasingly common and I wish the donators would not be so lazy that they can’t even research operating times and donate securely as it ends up getting nicked by passersby or just soaked by rain and then another chore for the staff to deal with.

Also you have donated in the past and I think PP saying you should make a cash donation I’d ignore personally as you already said you’re broke and on benefits and surely these shops are run primarily for the benefit of your demographic. Anyway, enjoy your fancy new dress!

Edited to say, just seen the above post so there you go!

I'm arguing with people with a different opinion because I don't agree with their opinion. I decided over the course of the thread that I would donate a fiver to the shop out of good will, so I am listening to what people are saying and changing my outlook to a minor extent accordingly. I'm not going to suddenly start thinking I should be arrested and charged with theft.

It’s absolutely fine. People don’t donate to charity purely to be charitable - let’s face it, the primary motivation is getting rid of stuff out of your home. Hence the dumping on the street. The charity shop may have made some money on it but they don’t like things dumped and it could have been ruined (or taken by someone else!) by the time they opened. Perhaps give the charity a quid or two if you can. You are happy, the dress is recycled, the donor has got rid of some clutter - everyone wins!

Thank you. Much appreciated x