Quiet coffee? Ha!

[pinklilys]

Ok, maybe I am, but went for a coffee in local cafe. Kids (3 around 9/10 years old) sitting behind squealing fit to bust. Parents actually moved tables leaving kids alone whilst they ‘did important work’ on their laptop.

I wear hearing aids and the screeching is physically painful. I never said anything but they obviously saw me looking at the kids, came over and tried to start an argument.

I did ask why if the work they were doing was so important they were doing it in a cafe, no real reason given. Of course it was then ‘she is ND, it’s not her fault’. Having a ND son I get that, but if I took him out and he was obviously annoying people I would take him out.

All I wanted was a quiet coffee which is getting more and more difficult now.

complain to staff?
Then screech louder than the kids if no joy?

That happened to me the other week. I had had a really busy week at work so I thought I would treat myself to a coffee and pastry in Costa. I sat in an empty corner. About five minutes later a group of about eight children, ranging from about three to nine, landed on the table beside me. They weren’t naughty, just loud. A few minutes later their mums delivered them some drinks and then sat at another table away from them, presumably so they could chat quietly! One mum actually said, ‘oh dear have we ruined your quiet coffee?’ 😡

lol! Staff studiously ignoring the noise, which tbh is par for the course, but it is also difficult, I’m not sure I would want to get involved if I was staff. They’ve gone now and it’s bliss!

I wonder if they’re on here…

I’m not sure I would want to get involved if I was staff.

What?

That's like saying 'I'm not sure if I would want to make coffee if I was staff'.

Dealing with minor customer complaints is all part of working with the public, and asking families to keep it down a bit in cafes is something many staff have to do quite often.

but you have to tell the staff. Keep telling them. Escalate to their management. This seems to be a trend in the UK (see other pp comment and the thread about children in a pub yesterday)

They take their noisy offspring somewhere, dump them to annoy everyone else and go to a quiet corner.

When they made the comment about disturbing your quiet drink, you should have said "yes, it is disgraceful behaviour, tell them to be quiet"

I was once out shopping and started to get a bad tension headache, so I thought I'd treat myself to a quiet coffee.

Got myself settled next to some empty tables, took some painkillers and was just reading on my phone waiting for the pain to subside.

A man came and sat on the next table and decided to watch loud motorbike videos. I did ask him to turn it down or wear headphones but he refused and also refused when the staff asked him. He said it was his right to do what he wanted 🙄

Alas this is why I splurged on a fancy coffee machine for myself, because quiet sleepy little café's don't seem to exist anymore. There's always someone with a shrill child or an adult who wants to play their music or YouTube videos out loud or people who don't seem to understand the concept of an inside voice. So I have my quiet coffees at home!

I went in a Starbucks the other day, dont often go in. Was enjoying a quiet coffee and all of a sudden there was dogs barking in there, couldn't believe it When was all this allowed? Doubt I'll be back. So they are losing a paying customer for dogs.

I have a to go coffee as quiet cafes dose not exsit anymore.
The last coffee shop i went in it was hell.
No kids in there surprisingly it was the adults so bloody loud.
Every table was louder than the next.
The over the top laughing over the top talking more of shouting.
It was head shattering.
I didn't finish my coffee I just left.
Now I get a coffee and sit in the park or graveyard or just make one at home.

If there were two parents you'd think they'd tag team so one can do the important work while the other supervises the DC in a less enclosed space if they can't help making loud noises.

It was half term last week, so whilst the roads were quieter, everywhere else was overrun with noise

Unfortunately typical of the entitled “I can behave how I like no matter how it affects anyone else” attitude being modelled by some parents to their children. The children will of course grow up equally entitled and selfish.

I'm sorry that happened to you. I have a choice of cafes where I live. The one I go to doesn't have noise, entitlement, "work station" problems. Lucky me I guess. If you don't have those choices then, sadly, a quiet coffee isn't going to be an option for you. I sympathise but I also wonder what on earth the owners of the cafes that allow quiet paying customers to be driven out are thinking.

The noise must bother them too, maybe they've got used to it. But I do wonder about the cost effectiveness of it. Do the people who stay for hours using their facilities as some sort of creche and / or work place really spend enough to be more valuable than a stream of customers buying food and drink, staying for half an hour or so and then being replaced by a new customer? Long term, I doubt it.

That's not your concern and no consolation to you. Maybe just hope that at some point soon a cafe owner might have the innovative idea of running a cafe as a place for people to go to and simply eat, drink and relax for a short time. Just like cafes used to be.

They have every right to work in a cafe. And kids that age are plenty old enough to sit apart from parents. But the parents absolutely should have checked the noise.

I try to avoid the main coffee shops. My home town is very small but still has a Costa which is always bursting at the seams with customers. Go up the high street and the Arts Centre has a brilliant reasonably priced quiet cafe to relax in. Love it.

It was a Costa, I have a lovely very local cafe I usually use but they don’t open on Sundays. Strangely enough you rarely if ever see children in there.
One parent (two women so I think possibly 2 families, but I never assume) made a really snarky comment possibly expecting me to ignore but I’m now old enough not to give a shit (to my DH embarrassment) so I replied. Weirdly the other parent said ‘they can’t help it, look at their face now you’re complaining’ but when we’d sat down and the parents were at the same table with the kids they were perfectly well behaved. It was only when the parents pissed off to another table the kids started screeching. So they obviously can help it.

I really wish some cafes had a no kids no dogs rule. I reckon from many of these posts they could make a killing!

I started going to museums and galleries for my coffee.

Coffee shops are just full of screaming feral offspring and their oblivious on their phones parents.

I’ve said before but I would happily pay €10 for a coffee if it was in a child free and enforced quiet place.

I tend to agree, however my experience of baristas in the UK is that they’re barely trained to make the coffee let alone basic customer service.

If a child ‘can’t help’ misbehaving then don’t take them out until they can.
There’s a café near me that doesn’t allow laptops or phone use. I’ve never been there when kids have been but it does mean people actually interact with each other.

There does seem to be an increase in the ‘they’re kids and that’s what kids do’. Not if you parent them properly it isn’t. Screeching and loud screaming is horrendous.

Well that’s until everyone else eventually finds it - which they will 😭.

I don’t mind kids or dogs but sometimes you just need a quiet third place and it’s a shame they’re increasingly disappearing. It’s actually good for your mental health to get out so it’s a shame to read so many people feeling they need to just buy a coffee machine and stay indoors instead.

That shouldn't have stopped the OP having a quiet word if the noise was bothering her.

I might ask next time I’m in (we have a lot in our town) about what there policy is, I will actually be interested to know if they would ask the parents to keep them quiet or ‘nothing to do with us mate’

This concept often appears on MN in the form of “It’s none of your business!”

I’ve seen any number of posts over the years where OP complains about inconsiderate behaviour from neighbours, people in restaurants or cafes, in the park etc where loud screechy laughter or shouting is going on, only to be told it’s not their business. Even sometimes “How does it affect you?” When it’s bleedin’ obvious it affects others.

We should all consider other people. But honestly, MN has made me despair sometimes - that attitude, which many of us have been brought up with, seems to be distinctly out of fashion and replaced by ‘You can’t tell me what to do!” or It’s none of your business!”🙄